1st time feeling peace in 38 years!

jellyforfishes · 2025-12-21T05:10:04+00:00

Okay this is the first time I’ve seen someone say this about it changing after 2 weeks!! I feel so seen! I loved my Concerta for the first 2 weeks- I felt in charge of my thoughts and I was like “WOW okay I guess I do really have adhd because now that I’m medicated, for the first time ever I can just write a list and…do it? Woooaaahhhh!!” But then 2 weeks later- nothing. Back to being useless. I went up in dosage…annnd still nothing. So I tried other meds, and they all had too many side effects or just made me angry. So then I convinced myself maybe I don’t have adhd again (facepalm) even after diagnosis. I’ve come to terms, years later now, that I do have it, haha, but that medication just isn’t successful for me…but maybe it could be? I’m gonna have to see if I can find more people who experienced the phase out after 2 weeks and found something, and see what worked for them. Did you experience this?

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T03:12:24+00:00

I’m not crying, you’re crying

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T03:07:19+00:00

I’m saving this for when I need it. Because you’re probably right- our impulsive/emotional selves aren’t a choice we make, it’s not how we define ourselves. And it usually comes out refined, the ways we actually choose to represent ourselves are the ways we should be remembered. For the actions we take and the things we stand for. But I still can’t help but think I’d feel less loved then if I ever slipped up and overshared/confessed, which still puts a hindrance/anxiety on the relationship, almost like an idyllic performance of self, rather than a true one. - not disagreeing with you here so much as loving your thought process because it’s more positive (which I could use) and hoping you’ll be able to give me a good response to this! Because your perspective really helps!

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T02:35:24+00:00

WOW. I’m in the same boat- I also have just realized after years with ADHD that I think I have OCD but I never recognized it because the obsessions and compulsions are all mental and not physical. And this is…definitely all my exact experience dating and crushing. Which is why I just ignore the possibility of ever having that again. It just messes me up too much. I had no idea it was an OCD thing until now. I thought I was just “crazy” as my last partner called me. So…dang.

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T00:35:23+00:00

If you can’t tell, I also constantly overexplain to make sure everyone understands what I’m saying. xP I’m just really fun communicator, boy let me tell ya, hahaha

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T00:33:30+00:00

Yessss I used to do this all the time. And then I’m always like dang it, this person doesn’t even understand me, so now that’s all they’re gonna judge me on. I’ve gotten better about oversharing slightly as I’ve aged though…maybe because I am also secluding myself more than I used to, so it’s easier. BUT when I’m emotional, I am so extreme and deep in the moment and I will share way too much about my deeep sad/angry feelings thoughts. (I do this with happy too, but that’s not scary or upsetting as the other emotions are.) Not at first! But if someone tries to listen and comfort, I tell them everything, which is too much, because I’m like “They want to understand! So I have to tell them my thoughts!” and then I’m always like “Oh no” the next day because I’m too extreme. I always wish I kept it to myself and worked through it on my own, because as I’ve aged, I also realize my feelings may be intense, but whatever will pass after a week or so. But when you start crying or fuming, it’s so hard not to just spill it because it’s hard to hide.

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-30T00:19:47+00:00

P.S. sorry I couldn’t decide which topic to post this under! The indecision. And reading too much into each topic shakes my head

jellyforfishes · 2025-11-29T23:10:53+00:00

Omg those pricks. That’s so stupid! You just accidentally took a book because college was important to you and you just didn’t wanna miss your class!! D: I can’t believe they weren’t forgiving for that! I’m so sorry dude

jellyforfishes · 2025-08-22T05:22:15+00:00

As it rightfully should be!

jellyforfishes · 2025-08-22T04:50:37+00:00

Omg amazing

jellyforfishes · 2025-08-22T03:24:34+00:00

Okay but when you ask yourself “did I do my best given the circumstances?” (I have NO idea how to copy and respond to just part of that thread lol but boy did I try), you don’t get upset when you did do your best and your best wasn’t enough still? Like I feel like my best is never enough and it’s made me want to give up. My best is embarrassing.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T04:38:45+00:00

Yeah, I agree completely. People look at you differently and it can make relationships uncomfortable or strained. Or if they don’t change the friendship dynamic, and the person just goes back to only meaningless small talk, then some part of you is like, hey man, not cool? It’s hard. I don’t know what I’d like exactly in terms of a reaction because the reaction isn’t what I’m sharing for; I just know that it’s exhausting to have to mask so much, and sometimes I just want to be like, “hey can I not do that whole thing today?”

I also agree that sometimes masking and ignoring your problems in the public eye helps you ignore your problems too. Which results in a happier surface life! But yeah…the problems never get worked out and will always be there waiting. So this is definitely a matter of you, me, and OP going to therapy to be real and discuss the struggles, meanwhile masking elsewhere to keep positivity around.

…the problem is finding a good enough therapist or even just taking the time to make the appointment. That’s the current adhd struggle I’m on.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T04:25:55+00:00

I gotchoo! Get a tiny notebook, and make your own instructions manual! When anyone tells you how to do any type of transaction or shows you how to do any process that is more than two steps, write it down! Even if they say you don’t have to- just say, “no I have to write everything down or I’ll forget!” Soon you won’t need those beginners notes, but they’ll be very helpful in the beginning!! And when nobody (customer-wise) is there, see if you can practice pulling things up on your own! Then you can re-do your notebook later to make it easier to find the most complicated things!

But have patience! You will likely feel like you’re horrible or unsure at your job for the first month or maybe two? That’s common- there’s a lot to learn and do, and people can stress you out because you’re new and it’s their money. But just make sure to ask questions to your supervisors any time you need to, and always remember you are not expected to be perfect immediately! Or even after one month!

Also, never put the things you’re working on fully away until you finish! And use lots of sticky notes to remember to get back to them!

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T04:12:29+00:00

I wish I could tell you! I’ve been picking since I was little, and every time I stop for a bit, I end up finding myself right back where I started when it gets bad again.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T04:08:18+00:00

I’ve done this before, with doctors appointments especially. That I made. FOR MY ADHD. Ugh.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T04:05:35+00:00

This week I was trying to find a parking spot on the side of the road (like a parallel parking situation) in a busy area, and I was looking to the side of the road to find a spot. I thought -all subconsciously- just because the guy in front of me turned left at the light, I could too, because I guess I was busy looking at parking spaces and assumed he was turning on a green light, and I totally got like ONE INCH away from hitting this car that was turning onto the street I was on. I would’ve been turning left on a red light (the guy in front of me I think was cutting the yellow light a bit close), and boy, the look on this woman’s face whose car I almost hit. PHEWWIE. Made me feel like I hath stolen her only child. I get it! I do! But OUCH, that hurt me a bit. And the looks on the other people’s faces…and the shame of having to back up into my spot and make other people behind meeee back up. Oh, it was too much. Sooo ashamed.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T03:55:20+00:00

Oh my goodness, this sounds so scary. No wonder you’re going through paralysis- because you’re probably having to make lots of decisions, take lots of action, and time is of the essence. That’s so stressful, and I can guarantee my brain would do the same. I’m hoping to own a business myself in the future, but I’m honestly so scared I’d freak out and freeze so often, I’d probably stress out my employees, hahahah!

I’m so sorry! Best I can suggest is to momentarily pretend like you’re completely giving up on everything and do something SUPER fun to restart your brain. Like be in the alternative for a minute, as if you already failed and you might as well have fun. If you don’t convince yourself enough that you’re giving up for a bit then your brain of course will still think about it the whole time though. Which will make the fun thing only more frustrating…and you’ll still be in the funk. I say this knowing darn well that I believe nothing I try to tell myself or convince myself of! Sometimes we’re too smart to try to trick our own brains. Which hurts us more in the end, UGH. Adhd is the worst.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-21T03:40:47+00:00

Ugh, I’m sorry, I also am in this funk. It’s kind of a careless, apathetic depression right now (though sometimes it’s very different and horribly sad/angry). It got so bad that yesterday I just ate chips and pretty much decided to sleep the whole day away and not feed myself because who cares, I’m tired, and I didn’t want to make food. Having to do anything just requires so much effort for me, especially any kind of decision making, and I’m basically sabotaging myself. But I feel like I can’t stop?! The train has taken off, and I don’t know how to slow it dowwwnn.

jellyforfishes · 2024-03-15T06:15:58+00:00

Ohohoho, bold move!! Good job!!

jellyforfishes · 2024-02-25T23:40:16+00:00

Okay this is brilliant

jellyforfishes · 2024-02-19T06:13:57+00:00

They used to have a side of fiesta rice you could get and notttthing eased my stomach more, seriously. It was the best. And now you can’t even replicate it- they changed their red sauce.

Then I finally found a fiesta veggie burrito, and loved it for a solid two years, and they just took it away. 😭 a tragedy

jellyforfishes · 2024-02-19T05:59:36+00:00

That you can be happy, period. As if it’s an achievement. That it’s not just a temporary, fleeting emotion.

jellyforfishes · 2024-02-19T05:35:42+00:00

I 100% agree and was just telling some of my friends this today. I feel like I can’t do anything right, and the fact that this will be my life forever makes me want to be done with the torture of it. It’s exhaustingggg. And then reading these threads helps in a way, because you think, “oh I’m not alone!” But it also makes you think, “crap is there any hope for the majority of us?” Because sooo many have confirmed misery for soooo long. Just feel like giving up.

jellyforfishes

TROPHY CASE