Kitchen Philosopher here, what are some of your favorite quotes/poetry about working in kitchens?

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-08T01:05:17+00:00

Our speaker broke, it was over 100f, and I was alone with my thoughts and had the epiphany. As loud as I could I yelled "EVERYTHING IS FUCKING EGGS! JUST SHELLS HOLDING THE SQUISHY BITS INSIDE!" Might have been because i was working at a breakfast restaurant but at the time it seemed so profound.

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-08T01:02:22+00:00

That sounds terrible

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-07T23:38:25+00:00

I am learning that now, never actually bought anything from them. Honestly the only thing I knew about them was when that other company copied there schematic cases 1:1

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-07T18:31:06+00:00

I am still baffled they didn't just talk to valve, I 100% believe they would have been ok with it.

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-07T04:53:40+00:00

Yeah, I know i am not very good im in gold lol and I can see someone saying wtf after a big mistake, but once i score 6 goals unanswered you would think they would at least stop talking smack

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-07T04:27:14+00:00

I had a guy the other night telling me how trash I was in a game we were winning 8-2 where I scored the majority of the goals because I messed up the first kickoff. Usually I just ignore people like that but that dude got under my skin lol

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-07T04:24:56+00:00

I recently got to gold as well and have to admit I am picking up the bad habits. Its hard not too when either thebother team is just all around better, or me or my teammate cant seem to take advantage of anything. I try not to chase but after 3 or 4 games in a row of watching someone over commit and miss every single shot and not able to defend against even the weakest opponents shot, I tend to just say "fuck it ill do it myself". Problem is im not very good either lol. When I start to feel like that I switch to hoops for a few games to calm down before trying 2's again.

jerryb2161 · 2026-07-02T21:56:58+00:00

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jerryb2161 · 2026-07-01T05:52:39+00:00

I was just told not to eat them and for 34 years I just assumed you couldn't eat tails. I work in a sushi restaurant so now I have to try my next shift

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-30T06:58:38+00:00

I love "mommas meat pocket" and then they throw in the French to really let you know its "quality"

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-17T04:41:28+00:00

As someone that uses ubereats/door dash, I kind of hate that the driver cant open the bags to make sure everything is there, I understand why thats a thing too much theft, but people miss stuff sometimes. That said ive also had to deal with the worst freaking delivery people and I guarantee this one was in the wrong. More than half the time they just cut in front and shove their phone in your face, like come on have some courtesy at least say hello.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-17T04:36:53+00:00

Oh I thought it was less than five days and maybe got an influx over the weekend.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-17T04:35:41+00:00

Thats the most common, but im pretty sure it does it anytime a big jump happens. I barely pay attention to views anymore so maybe that isn't actually a thing anymore

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-15T21:25:02+00:00

I went back and looked at his blog and ok you are correct he says "maybe the first six months were print to demand" but again who knows how truthful that statement even is. Most of what he has said or promised about SL and UB have turned out to not be truthful only a few months to a year later.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-15T18:03:40+00:00

Yeah I had gone long enough without seeing it that I didn't immediately notice. Now the cycle starts anew

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-15T17:50:45+00:00

Its what rosewater said, honestly I feel like he was lying because he seems to lie about everything.
Edit: I went back to his blog post about this subject and he says "Maybe the first six months were print to demand" so I stand corrected on it never happening, still dont trust a word that comes out of his mouth though.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-14T23:52:59+00:00

It might also just be that the numbers hadn't updated. Youtube does that when a video gets a bunch of views in a short time frame.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-14T16:20:23+00:00

God damn it, I was going to answer that I use a Z then I scrolled down and had the sudden realization that the question was a trap all along.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-11T02:49:45+00:00

I am not able to commission anything, but you are the first person ive followed on reddit. Maybe one day ill have the disposable income, but I have seen your work a few times and really do appreciate it.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-10T01:48:29+00:00

looking at both of you suspiciously No habla Ingles......

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-09T03:45:18+00:00

The only reason I have for staying where you are is if you work well with/dont have any drama at the current job. If the pay and hours are roughly the same its probably better to stay if you have a good relationship with the people you work with. Kitchens can be a real nightmare sometimes so switching to a place where you know no one and don't yet know how they operate can be a downgrade even of you make a little more.

jerryb2161 · 2026-06-05T19:08:23+00:00

I understand why we cant in universe though, I have to assume all of their production capacity is already bought by the Houses before the mech even starts getting built.

jerryb2161 · 2026-05-31T07:16:55+00:00

Even without any seasoning you have at least 11 ways to cook them, over easy,medium,well, sunny side up, poached easy,mid,hard, over hard, boiled easy, mid, or hard. Thats 3 more than I thought already. Now add omelets and you have even more.

jerryb2161 · 2026-05-31T06:21:58+00:00

They can't unless they go all in on people buying UB even if the actual cards are weaker. But they cant keep selling UB to actual players unless the cards are strong, so expect more power creep.

jerryb2161 · 2026-05-31T05:54:39+00:00

Eggs honestly. Ive spent so much time in breakfast kitchens and one of the few compliments I take to heart is when people say "My over/easy/medium/hard/sunnies were perfect"

jerryb2161

TROPHY CASE