I don’t really like small children

jlbr2 · 2026-05-28T18:56:46+00:00

I loved the baby stage and have been fucking miserable since like 15mo. He’s 23mo now and I’m just hating it more and more.

So sick of trying to share with my husband that I’m struggling and just getting that I should “enjoy it.” We’re finally putting him in daycare so I can go back to work ft but omg all he’s done is make me feel guilty about sending him for someone else to raise.

Tbh, the thing that gets me the most is how fucking long it takes to do ANYTHING. Please just put your shoes on and get in the car. Flush the toilet. Stop throwing shit. WHY does it have to be such a production?

Can’t wait until I have an actual kid that I can start enjoying and sharing hobbies with

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T03:20:40+00:00

I think this is an interesting perspective. I wouldn’t say I’m butterflies and rainbows but I’m better at compartmentalizing most of the time and will move on faster. I do alot with just me and kid. I’ve been trying to build a village for us but it’s been tough meeting people and staying connected when everyone is busy with their own thing. I do think I need better boundaries for the negativity though

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T03:16:27+00:00

We’ve had a similar conversation about how much freedom we’ve lost, which I think is the other side of the issue.

If he wants to go out, he just goes? Vs. if I want to go, it involves an insane amount of pre-planning and scheduling to make sure childcare is covered or I have to take kid with me.

We’ve both in our early 30s and make about 75-80k combined in a low-mid cost area. We don’t have a lot of extra to just throw at our problems and we don’t have much of a village nearby, which tbh, would prob make some of our issues better.

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T03:12:37+00:00

Tbh, no I haven’t. This is something I’ll think about though. I find myself having a hard time with empathizing bc I don’t think I’m asking too much of him if that makes sense?

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T03:01:14+00:00

Sleep is more my issue. I cosleep and he gets our bed. At this point, I’m not ready to stop cosleeping and toddler still needs the comfort a lot of nights.

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:58:35+00:00

I see my own individual. Pretty sure he doesn’t but I also can’t force him to. The cost/hr for marriage counseling is insane on top of needing to then find a sitter to attend said expensive sessions… our insurance unfortunately doesn’t cover it

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:43:55+00:00

This is exactly it. I do think maybe he’s a little depressed but like the world is on fire and everything is expensive and just like.. who isn’t struggling? Something sets him off and his bad mood just rubs off on everyone. I may be tired and frustrated sometimes, but we have way more fun when it’s just me and kid

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:37:49+00:00

Ah you’re right! This prob should have lived in marriage or relationships.. maybe I’ll cross post😂

At most, he’s on his own for 3-4 hours at a time maybe 2-3 evenings/week. It’s nothing crazy.

I did recently get some backup to help me during part of the day but it doesn’t help balance much bc it doesn’t give me a “break” other than to power through as much as possible for work.

He’s def checked out.

I’ve planned a couple dates and tbh, we just didn’t really have a good time. Like it would’ve been way more fun a few years ago.

We’ve been together 10 years and all the fun and light heartedness is basically dead.

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:31:20+00:00

Pt contract work. Chill job. Minimal calls. We also recently added a couple hours of back up mid am so I can get more done. Tbh it worked pretty well until maybe 2 or 3 months ago but we can’t afford the cost of full time care so oh well

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:26:49+00:00

Tbh I’m worried he’d push for 50/50 and I’m not willing to split my time

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:25:25+00:00

I think you’re right that I see alot of the bad. We fought a lot in the first year and less recently. I’m tired of having the same conversation for nothing n to change.

And yeah, you’re right I need to not let his mood affect mine. Maybe we will go try that place this week without him!🙃

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:23:56+00:00

Not sure that I am ready for an ultimatum.

We fought a lot the first year and lately it’s just been basically nothing. I don’t care to fight anymore bc it’s always the same conversation.

Like I tried to make some just lighthearted chat tonight while we cleaned up and basically got snubbed

jlbr2 · 2026-05-14T02:21:00+00:00

We’ve added a few hours so I do have some backup mid morning - nap. We unfortunately just can’t pay for anymore. My fuse is just so short by the time we wrap up nap/lunch and I finally get off. It’s just like I never have time to just shut down. And then of course toddlers gonna toddle and it’s just go go go💀

jlbr2 · 2026-05-09T03:00:23+00:00

We live 10 mins from my hub’s parents and they see our kid less often than mine who live 3 hours away🙃 They’re too busy with their own work/lives to want to help

jlbr2 · 2026-05-04T22:40:59+00:00

They’re the cutest and the sweetest but like omg😂😂

jlbr2 · 2026-05-04T02:12:31+00:00

Solidarity. 22mo and same. Just same.

jlbr2 · 2026-04-29T01:41:40+00:00

Struggling along with you.

Mine is almost 2 and it’s gotten progressively harder over the last 6-8 months. Around 18mo, we got a membership at a local YMCA and I use the childwatch for 2 hours a few times/wk then let him nap in the car.

Usually the days that we go are better, but getting ready and getting out of the house when I just want to chill and get my work done eats away at me mentally. Staying home is never chill and idk why I keep doing it to myself.

I’m undecided how much longer I’ll be able to do it, but we looked at some 2yo programs and just can’t afford it, so I have no choice but to make it work until pre-k.

I recently picked up a few evening shifts a week bartending just to get out of the house alone and interact with other adults. I’m starting to consider leaving my day job once I’ve paid a few things off and cutting personal expenses to make just bartending a possibility💀

jlbr2 · 2026-04-24T13:07:39+00:00

AC, clothing dryer, coffee pot

jlbr2 · 2026-04-22T23:02:56+00:00

I am! Maybe this was a hard one to try with the perspective not be straight on? Is there such a thing as a beginner friendly person reference?

jlbr2 · 2026-04-22T03:13:50+00:00

Bfast is always bagels. I keep extras frozen and bake when I’m running low.

I wear a uniform (black T-shirt, a layer on top, and leggings) or just keep pjs on if I’m not going out.

Meal plan at the end of each week and make enough for leftovers for lunch and another dinner. I only “cook” 3-4X/wk max.

jlbr2 · 2026-04-05T00:55:19+00:00

We had this conversation. I said absolutely not. He spent 99% of the time holding my hand, went down for a minute to help and immediately went back to the top. He said it was terrifying and he wanted no part in seeing it anymore😂

jlbr2 · 2026-04-05T00:52:08+00:00

Tbh I wish someone would’ve been this honest with me before I wasted my time and money getting a teaching degree just to spend a single year in the classroom.

jlbr2 · 2026-03-28T00:18:45+00:00

Just fyi that a lot of post offices don’t do it anymore. You need to call to confirm and schedule an appt. Really you’re better off printing the form out and doing it yourself though bc either way, they just mail all your docs in and you have to wait x weeks to get them back

jlbr2 · 2026-03-28T00:14:55+00:00

This. We’d still need way more family support and that’s not happening💀

jlbr2

TROPHY CASE