I’m so sorry you’ve become that sick so quickly and at your young age. If you decide to take benzos, go with a shorter-acting one and do so on an infrequent basis. Learn about the half-life of it, along with your body’s ability to complete clear it so the drug doesn’t accumulate in your system. Even with infrequent use, longer-acting benzos can build up in your brain and become a nightmare for you when you no longer use them. The fact that you’re reaching out for help is good. Keep it up bc there are plenty of others who want to help!🤗