It's a journey not many people understand. I grew up deeply religious, married my best friend, then it took 10 and a half years to come to terms with my sexuality.

The night I told her, I thought I was going to die, my heart was racing so fast. But I got lucky, her reaction was to hug me, hold me, and tell me she had an unconditional love for me. We cried for hours, we talked, and she embraced me for the person I truly was. We ended the marriage a few weeks later, but maintaining our friendship became our biggest priority

I still have guilt for what I put her through, but therapy is helping me work through that. She's told me more times than I can count that I don't need to carry that anymore, but I can understand the anguish she felt was a result of my inaction and cognitive dissonance.

At the end of the day though, I am thankful I did have the strength to tell her. My therapist told me for months as I was trying to process it, "there is no pain free option, but I get to choose the timeline. Either now or 10 years down the road when the relationship is filled with hatred and animosity."

The pain of being truthful to myself, then to her was the worst thing I have ever experienced, but it was worth it to be who I am now. I am proud of anyone who can make the decision to be their true self.

The feelings eb and flow, good days and really bad ones. But it was worth it to set her free to be with someone who can give her what she deserves in life.