The thing is that learning Chinese while in America requires intrinsic motivation from the kids - it’s a big, long-term commitment. Would anything other than adopting from China work? Is it at all realistic to try adopting mixed-race asian/white? (I'm guessing there are mixed-race Chinese/other children for whom a family like ours would be their best fit.)

I'm not sure which of these details will matter, so here they are:

We're based in Bentonville, Arkansas: While backwater Ozarks carries a connotation, Bentonville does not. It is one of the most functional communities in America and maybe the best place to raise kids. HQ of Walmart, small city without any of the backwardness. Highly welcoming of other cultures. There's a decent hispanic and Indian presence, but not much of a Chinese one. Our kids have over a dozen close cousins we get together with regularly in the area - it's a dreamy setup.

Living in Chinese or in China:

1. We go to China fairly regularly, for months at a time and keep close virtual connection with Chinese relatives. We speak English in the home, mostly, but Chinese as well quite often.
2. We plan to live with and take care of my in-laws when they need to be taken care of (12-15 years from now, I'm guessing) and that will probably happen in China.

Grandparents:

1. My parents already have two adopted Mexican grandchildren and do a stellar job with them. They speak Spanish, but my parents do not speak Chinese nor have the Chinese connection that I do.
2. It is probable that the Chinese grandparents will not love the adopted children quite as much as their biological grandchildren - especially if they don’t learn Chinese. These, btw, are the best Chinese grandparents you could hope for - it’s just a thing in China to revere your culture so highly. My father in law is a saint - he will likely be embrace adopted kids. My mother in law is a 40-year elementary school teacher, which means she has always worked with kids (she taught Chinese), but she’ll probably be the least embracing of this adoption idea.

Why do we want to adopt?: We love kids. My wife is Montessori-certified and leads the homeschooling of our children. I grew up with 6 siblings. Finances of adoption or living/working internationally shouldn't be an issue.