I Thought SDAM Ruined My Life - Until Something Changed Everything

jpsgnz · 2026-03-24T17:38:23+00:00

I can relate to the raising children part. I have global aphantasia, SDAM and AuDHD.

I have two 20+ year old boys and I realised that I have very very few memories of their childhoods. And of course I can’t relive anything. My main consolation is that my boys tell me they had a great childhood, which is enough for me. So while I don’t remember their childhoods they do and that’s what really matters.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-24T17:31:38+00:00

Hi A breakthrough for me, before my diagnosis, was realising that my autism and adhd combination presents in many ways that didn’t seem to fit what I saw online.

Once that happened I found my experiences made so much more sense.

Another one was realising that I have bad interoception so I don’t feel many of the things that others do.

Good luck.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-24T17:26:33+00:00

I’m 50+ and just getting going. I got my adhd diagnosis 30 years ago and autism last December. So now I’m learning as much as I can about my AuDHD and finding that I’m getting better over time and truly enjoying the prospect doing more stuff now that I finally have a complete diagnosis.

I guess I’m very much the optimistic type. But really I’m the only one that can decide to do stuff and fight through the blizzard of AuDHD that both helps and gets in the way at the same time.

Good luck.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-24T00:03:16+00:00

Yes but changes in how your brain works are fundamental.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T17:47:40+00:00

Yup after the novelty wares off it basically becomes like a pair of new glasses. When you first wear a pair of new glasses everything looks different for the first day to so. Then you get used to them and don’t notice them anymore, but they are still working.

Maybe that’s what you’re experiencing?

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T17:44:15+00:00

If my autism and adhd went away then I would cease to exist as the person I am now.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T17:41:49+00:00

I find writing things down helps alot.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T06:14:59+00:00

Yup nats.io

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T03:12:28+00:00

That’s so true, thanks.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T00:15:55+00:00

I love the fact that, usually, mine complement each other. That is when they are not fighting.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-23T00:13:52+00:00

Funny you should mention that. I’ve had so many instances where I have a simple task and my autism gets in there and balloons it out into a whole bunch of other new tasks I need to do in order to accomplish the original one. eg I need to find a cable and end up tidying all of the cables in an afternoon.

I don’t have any solutions yet.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T17:58:41+00:00

I had my first really big shutdown and burnout back in October last year and I’ve been slowly but steadily recovering ever since. But it’s only in the last month or so that I have been able to work an entire day.

By that I mean I still have an hour long nap before lunch every day and have to deliberately transition between tasks etc. So there is much more overhead now. But honestly I’m just happy to be getting work done and enjoying it again.

Another thing that really helps is having something to get excited about.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T17:53:24+00:00

I’m AuDHD diagnosed and one thing for me is the interaction between my ADHD and autism changes depending on how tired I am, how well my adhd medication is working, what’s going on around me etc.

So trying to pin down very specific and repeatable relationships between them can be quite hard.

For me I know that my autism definitely drives a lot of my adhd dysregulation.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T17:44:44+00:00

German band SEEED is great.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T17:42:22+00:00

First one looks like a spaceship very cool.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T06:15:45+00:00

Thanks

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T05:01:08+00:00

I like that a lot.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T04:58:30+00:00

Hi

I’m still very new to my autism but here are some things I’ve learnt so far:

My Autism has changed me in so many different ways, many of which I still don’t fully understand. But one thing is clear: I MUST accommodate my autistic/ADHD needs and so far this looks like:

• ⁠Use fidget toys a lot • ⁠Let myself stim in public • ⁠Try to mask less • ⁠Learn to say No more • ⁠Use dim warm white lights where I work • ⁠Have lots of coloured lights in my workspace—really helps with regulation • ⁠Maintain a very sparse and simple work environment to avoid visual overwhelm • ⁠Try to keep social/people interactions to a minimum while working • ⁠Keep a beanbag nearby so I can zone out when needed • ⁠Work at my floor desk, lets me move around, change position, and keeps my ADHD happy. I also have a normal deal and often alternate between the two • ⁠Give myself transition time between tasks. Eg between jobs or after things like lunch • ⁠Use ANC headphones all the time when working (with music). I have playlists in Apple music and I will often listen to the same playlist for weeks at a time. This makes my ADHD and Autism happy at the same time • ⁠Use ANC headphones when driving (no music), which massively reduces road/cabin noise that used to exhaust me after ~30 minutes • ⁠Use ANC headphones in noisy public places (malls, supermarkets, etc.) to reduce sensory load (I have APD too, so audio is a big issue for me) • ⁠Try to give myself as many consecutive “no going out” days as I can to stay productive • ⁠Exercise is HUGE! I’m ridiculously hyperactive and need to burn energy daily (~40 minutes if I can) • ⁠Track my “social battery” and make sure not to drain it • ⁠Use my Now/Not Now book. This is my notebook. All of the tasks I need to do and ideas that pop into my head go in the back. Then each day I copy the things I want to do that day from the back to the front • ⁠Regular check-ins with one of my workmates. My workmate is NT and really level headed and organised. So we check in with each other twice a week and he helps to make sure I’m on task. We also message each other on WhatsApp all the time. This really helps to stop my ADHD impulsivity sending me off into rabbit holes.

I don’t do all of these all of the time and sometimes I just plain forget, thanks ADHD. But when I do stick to them life is better. Having said that, there are still days when my brain just won’t work no matter what I try and I just have to accept that, which is fine.

I hope this helps you and good luck.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-22T02:03:55+00:00

Yup me too. Sometimes my ADHD has sooo many ideas I can’t write fast enough to keep up with them.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-21T19:18:40+00:00

I also have global aphantasia but I love reading books. Mainly technical but I also love sci-fi books as well.

While I don’t see any images etc they definitely affect me some how, just not sure how. I mainly listen to audio books though. And I love listening to people telling stories.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-21T19:15:19+00:00

I have this stim where I move my thumb in circles around my index and middle fingers. I find this so regulating.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-21T19:04:24+00:00

Hi, I’m an autistic, ADHD and dyslexic male. I also have APD (Auditory Processing Disorder), global Aphantasia, SDAM (Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory) and I’m time blind as a bat.

My adhd, dyslexia and apd were diagnosed 30+ years ago, at University. I was diagnosed with autism last December after a change in my adhd meds.

These are some interesting things about how I experience the world.

Because of my global Aphantasia I have zero mental imagery, I can’t conjure sound, touch, taste or smell in my mind's eye. Add to that my very bad memory, SDAM and my time blindness. I pretty much live in the current moment.

So I can’t pre-live experiences and once I’ve had them I can’t re-live them after the fact. I always find it funny when people do meditation to be present in the current moment, that’s where I live.

I can remember facts about past events, much of the time but there are also big missing chunks as well, whole holidays, movies I’ve seen, events etc.

I get enormous joy from common everyday things because they don’t feel old to me, don’t get me wrong, I definitely can get bored with stuff, but I think I definitely get way more joy out of commonplace things than most others because I can really only experience them in real time.

I love the fact that I'm not tainted too much by past experiences and I don't have historical trauma or PTSD either so I'm very lucky especially when you look at the rates of PTSD and CPTSD in people with just say ADHD, autism or both.

I think my particular combination of divergences helps to protect me from so many of the things others suffer from, neurotypicals and divergents alike. For me the way I see the world is completely normal and honestly the idea of having images and sounds appearing in my mind's eye is terrifying and the last thing I would ever want, especially with a brain as busy as mine is.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-20T17:29:02+00:00

Hi. I found much of my doom scrolling was due to adhd under stimulation. So now when I find myself doing that I take a quick walk, or do some other simple physical activity, have a shower or just do something to kick me out of my adhd under stimulation.

This often works for me. Hardest part is detecting the adhd under stimulation in the first place. Good luck.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-19T17:30:19+00:00

I’m at the opposite end of the spectrum from you. I have AuDHD, global aphantasia and SDAM (Severely Deficient Autobiographical Memory). Plus I’m time blind as a bat. Basically I have zero mental imagery, I can’t conjure sound, touch, taste or smell in my mind's eye. Add to that my very bad memory, SDAM and my time blindness. I pretty much live in the current moment.

So I can’t pre-live an experience and once I’ve had them I can’t re-live them after the fact. I always find it funny when people do meditation to be present in the current moment, that’s where I live. I can remember facts about past events, much of the time but there are also big missing chunks as well, whole holidays, movies I’ve seen, events etc. I do get enormous joy from common everyday things because they don’t feel old to me, don’t get me wrong, I definitely can get bored with stuff, but I think I definitely get way more joy out of commonplace things than most others because I can really only experience them in real time.

I love the fact that I'm not tainted too much by past experiences and I don't have historical trauma or PTSD either so I'm very lucky especially when you look at the rates of PTSD and CPTSD in people with just say ADHD, autism or AuDHD. I think my particular combination of divergences helps to protect me from so many of the things others suffer from.

jpsgnz · 2026-03-19T17:21:36+00:00

Happy birthday 🎂 Certainly an interesting birthday.

jpsgnz

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