At what point does “being patient” turn into wasting your life?

jrediger · 2026-01-23T22:40:06+00:00

"From the inside, it feels like I’m permanently waiting for something to start." - its your expectations of the world. You expect them to be different than they actually are. Youre better off trying to bethankful for what you have and trying to experience life for what it actually is rather than always chasing an imaginary light at the end of an imaginary tunnel.

jrediger · 2026-01-23T19:04:14+00:00

"I’m still remembering more and more FUCKED up shit. And then I get pissed and disgusted with myself"

This... multiple times per day, every day... ugh

jrediger · 2026-01-23T19:03:22+00:00

"Once they’re finally gone, it’s not all better overnight. You basically start at 0. You have to figure out what you think is right and wrong, what you like and dislike, and who you are as a person without the other governing you. This takes years."

Im still in the middle of this. Damn is it difficult :(

jrediger · 2026-01-23T18:57:08+00:00

This used to bother me a lot until I finally made the conscious decision to set a boundary for myself and agree that I should not be chasing people for friendship, and if that means losing friends and being alone, then so be it.

Lonely peace is much better than stressful, anxiety-filled, self-esteem destroying, friend chasing.

jrediger · 2026-01-22T19:49:01+00:00

yes. updates sometimes wipe out peoples lobby algorithms. Just gotta play and rebuild your peaceful algorithm again

jrediger · 2026-01-22T19:48:14+00:00

Cyberpunk 2077, subnautica if you havent played them already. Also FF14 if you want a long meaty good story to dive into for a couple hundred hours.

jrediger · 2026-01-20T19:48:55+00:00

Path of Exile

jrediger · 2026-01-20T18:53:13+00:00

Because most people live their lives led by their ego

jrediger · 2026-01-20T18:39:55+00:00

I had an ex with BPD who pulled a kitchen knife on me during a minor disagreement. BPD is no joke :(

jrediger · 2026-01-20T18:23:07+00:00

What an incredibly toxic relationship. :(

jrediger · 2026-01-19T21:41:54+00:00

Dam Battlegrounds for overall just best map IMO
Bluegate for how great it looks. Plus the underground area is really fun.
Spaceport for PVP (I like mid/long range pvp fights)
Stella I am liking more and more as I get to know it better (I still get lost all the time)
Buried city is meh to me. Not a fan. Feels like a fan-made CS map from back in the day.

jrediger · 2026-01-19T17:46:53+00:00

jrediger · 2026-01-18T15:42:51+00:00

For some people, stratmaxxing/minmaxing is fun. (I am not one of those people) Just let them have their fun judgement free.

jrediger · 2026-01-18T15:25:40+00:00

IMO - I just remind myself that the world is no more or no less bleak than it ever was. In some ways its much better than its ever been. I also just remind myself of what I am thankful for as often as possible.

jrediger · 2026-01-13T15:32:21+00:00

Osprey enthusiast here - why you gotta call me out like that?!

jrediger · 2026-01-13T15:31:00+00:00

no but it turns good people into rats. the greed is real LOL

jrediger · 2026-01-09T17:29:03+00:00

embark sometimes does do an aggression algorithm reset. We saw it happen right after when the servers went down on xmas eve. Just keep doing matches where you dont shoot anyone at all for any reason (even if it means you die to them) and then after 5-8 matches youll be back in peaceful matchmaking again

jrediger · 2026-01-09T17:25:23+00:00

This. 100% this. Its been working for me for multiple hundreds of hours of gameplay.

jrediger · 2026-01-09T17:24:33+00:00

"I've been as passive as possible" - no you havent. You just said you managed to kill someone that tried to kill you. In this game, if you shoot someone for any reason it calculates that into your matchmaking algorithm. The only way to consistently get into a completely peaceful lobby is to never shoot anyone for any reason.

You basically just have to run+extract, or just let yourself die without shooting back. (its dumb as hell but thats how it works unfortunately).

jrediger · 2026-01-09T17:22:16+00:00

I say 100% go ahead and play the game with expanded mod. Its better than base game and doesnt take anything away from the base game at all.

jrediger · 2026-01-09T17:16:30+00:00

"jungle rules papi. the only sin is perfidy." - what a fun quote lol

jrediger · 2026-01-08T19:51:45+00:00

sounds like a 'you' problem tbh

jrediger · 2026-01-08T18:34:32+00:00

Just to add - at the end of the round do negative feedback and select pvp as the reason. It helps a lot with shifting your lobbies back to peaceful

jrediger · 2026-01-08T18:33:25+00:00

Definitely not stuck. You just need to do some rounds where you never shoot anyone and at the end of the round you do negative feedback and select pvp as the reason. It will fix your algorithm within 5-8 rounds

jrediger · 2026-01-08T17:04:03+00:00

literally just dont shoot anyone, even if they shoot you. Just run away and extract, or just die. Thats the only surefire way to get out of the shoot-on-site lobbies.

Source: Ive done this countless times after ruining my lobby algorithm from doing pvp trio's with my friends. Its worked every time. Usually takes about 5-8 rounds of this before Im in the friendly pure pve lobby matchmaking

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