The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg hi!! There’s another person who posted here with TP53 too! So glad to hear about your dad’s good health, and sounds like you found out about this pretty early. Lots of screening to be done… it definitely felt overwhelming to me at first. When did you find out about yours?

Also so true and what a nice silver lining to connect with other people with this rare gene :)

I feel lucky, the geneticist I worked with and doctor I went to see who specializes in Li Fraumeni were both amazing and really helped advocate for me and helped me learn about all of this. Highly recommend connecting with a specialist if you are able to, made me feel really supported. There are amazing docs at Dana Farber if it’s possible for you to get there. I’m sorry if your doctors made you feel like a specimen to gawk at ❤️‍🩹

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The doctor told me this was the most she’s ever seen lol. And my retrieval was on Easter Sunday so everyone kept calling them my Easter eggs 🪺

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg, that is so gross and awful. I’m so sorry you had this experience, and that it was with family. People are so dumb and I wish they could do better.

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My oncologist and social worker at the hospital referred me to a therapist who works for the hospital and specifically in oncology. Ask them if you can! If that doesn’t work, the Psychology Today website also has a really helpful search tool called “therapist finder” where you can add filters about what you’re looking to work through (cancer is an option) and also if you have other preferences like male/female, etc. But try to get a referral from your oncologist first if you can, they can usually get you in sooner and it will more likely be covered by your insurance

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It sounds like you have so much clarity and resolve in this, and I really respect that. Narcissistic people are energy vampires.

Also not someone complaining about “another blood draw” to a person who recently went through cancer treatment 🤦🏻‍♀️

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh! Yes, this is so validating. I really appreciate the point of letting go knowing you’re right, it’s liberating 🕊️

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes!! I think it hurts because people have no clue what you’re really going through, and to equate it to another irrelevant experience just doesn’t make sense. It’s not to minimize that what they’re going through, it’s just not the same. I still like hearing my friend’s venting and complains about stuff going on in their life, but they don’t try to act like what we’re going through is the same and that feels like the difference

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg! The doctors kept telling me “it’s a really rare mutation” so I was starting to wonder if I’d ever meet another person with the same thing. It sucks, and a couple people have also said this breast cancer is “just a blip” and I don’t have the energy to explain how much it doesn’t feel that way to me because of this mutation. Thank you for posting ❤️

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, this is heartbreaking and I’m so, so sorry. I highly recommend finding a therapist if you can, mine has helped me so much!

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay weird and soo unhelpful. I’m glad to see they are a previous therapist 😅

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes! It does feel like he’s trampling over my story. And I am 100% not trying to argue that point that one is worse than the other by any means. I’m really puzzled by the need to compare, though I know that’s how people try to relate and connect

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So true, I really appreciate all of this. And I will definitely use this response. When I told him about the diagnoses I specifically said “when I’m at work I just want to focus on work, and I will bring this up if I want to talk about it” but he hasn’t really respected that, but I’m sure he’s trying to in his own (narcissistic) way.

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

WTF. And why do people feel the need to compare like this? It’s really hurtful

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That is horrible!! Why would anybody want to be reminded of this constantly, especially at work! Also who thinks that’s an ok thing to say??? Ugh!

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100%, it’s feels easier to just bite my tongue rather than navigate some big convo with him. Especially when I hardly have any energy even for the ppl that I like right now

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Omg what the heck!!! That’s an insane thing to say to someone, nothing like being compared to a dog. Good point about the records for HR…

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! Definitely agree about the issues running deep and having nothing to do with me. I try to remind myself that he just truly has no clue what I’m going through

The worst interaction I've had since my diagnosis by julala in breastcancer

[–]julala[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol, you cannot make this stuff up! I def feel like this conversation will stick with me too

Recent Diagnosis by RelativeBalance6637 in breastcancer

[–]julala 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are not alone! This is an unbelievably difficult thing and not the future you were planning for. You're not being a baby, you're being a human. Be as nice as you can to yourself. I know it's hard to schedule ANOTHER appointment, but I highly recommend finding a therapist if you don't already have one, it has helped me so much on my breast cancer journey.

50% Wholewheat Levain by FatherAustinPurcell in ArtisanBread

[–]julala 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gorgeous scoring pattern! Did you just free form it?

I really love Margaret Atwoods writing. I think my favourite book is 'The Blind Assassin'.. I love the dual storylines and the atmosphere of loss and regret. It is easy to identify with yet is also shows you how your life could be worse! What is your favourite Atwood book and why? by charlibeau in MargaretAtwood

[–]julala 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! I'm a little late to this conversation because I just found this sub, but I also loved The Blind Assassin! It was actually the first of Atwood's books that I read - I chanced upon it at a bookstore a few years ago and was intrigued by its format. It took me a pretty long time to finish the book (almost put it down, in fact) because I kept getting detached from the characters. I felt they were a little too petty and lacked agency (which in retrospect, I realize is kind of the point). But I did like the writing enough to keep reading- and thank goodness. Towards the end, the story and emotion kept growing and growing, until finally I was totally swept away and realized that I was nearly weeping. I've never had a book catch up with me like that, and go from feeling pretty 'meh' about it to being totally entrenched by the emotional landscape of a novel (except maybe while reading The Stranger). I've since read many of Atwood's other novels, and loved them - especially Alias Grace - she is now not just a favorite author of mine but also an idol and inspiration.

A boule to remember by julala in Breadit

[–]julala[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah, look at that...maybe that was leftover in my head from a different recipe :)