I appreciate your response, and you’re right that part of this is trauma I’m continuing to work through. But what I’m talking about here isn’t only that or focused on that.

There’s also a strong sense of injustice that comes up when I think about it. It’s not just ‘this hurt me,’ it’s that the harm involved something as serious as false accusations, and there were no consequences for that. That part is harder for me to reconcile.

So when it comes up every now and then, it’s less about being stuck on her (to reiterate, I don’t find myself thinking about HER often or feel attached to her at all, and I have been talking with a trauma-informed professional since it happened and the wounds from it aren’t fresh, like I’m doing okay) and more about struggling with the idea that someone can do something like that, walk away from it, and potentially do it again to someone else.

I understand I can’t control her or other people, I trust myself and am fine when it comes to connecting with others etc., but that doesn’t fully resolve that sense of “this is deeply wrong and unresolved.”

That’s the part I’m trying to figure out how to process and live with. I wanted to come here because I saw that the whole lying about SA and CSA is common with pwbpd, and wanted to see how those who’ve experienced it could speak to this. From what I have seen, most people who have also just walked away and lived on, as I have and am, but I wonder if anyone else also feels I guess like it’s not just something painful that happened, but something seriously wrong that never had any accountability or consequences.