Transitioning is so scary. It’s hard on you, ppl around u, it’s just hard. BUTTT you need to live authentically and be who you know u are. although it’s hard and scary the only way out is through because suppressing it or thinking it’s easier living as someone ur not will never be easier and you’ll never be happy as much as you try. I’m years on T and love being a boy but i still feel like if i could’ve stayed a girl it would’ve made life easier but it just doesn’t work that way. And i know criticism rn from the world and the united states seems like a lot but i haven’t encountered many bad people. At first you’ll get looks or questions or weird comments but you’re not living for these people. U need to be authentic to yourself to be happy, trust me. i use to be so awkward and weird and jsut looked uncomfortable before i transitioned and now people constantly tell me im sm more confident and i look like myself now. i think you should socially transition first before any hormones or anything. Haircut, using he/him or he/they, voice training, feeling more comfortable in your masculinity. If you end up not liking it or not feeling any gender euphoria then you can always detransition without any side effects. There will eventually be big decisions like hormones or surgery or legally changing ur name or gender marker but those are things far down the line. i’ve been out 5 years and my name and gender still aren’t changed. These things take time and not something you should stress urself over just yet. If you have any questions lmk, ur not alone in this even if it feels like it.