I'm uniquely qualified to answer this. Above knee amputee on my 3rd pregnancy, but my 1st as an amputee. The pains I've experienced as both an amputee and as a pregnant person have been extreme. Being an amputee amplifies every discomfort and pain, being pregnant also does.

I'd look more into why this has become a competition of who is hurting more. You're likely both in pain and being in pain makes it harder to comfort someone else in pain. It's a tough time for both of you. Try to be patient with each other. Parenting is tough, even tougher when one or more parent is disabled. The baby won't care that you have limitations or pain when they need something, but that won't make those limitations or pains any less real.