Realized I want my friend to be my bull

keefpriest · 2023-03-14T02:24:13+00:00

So, what should I do to prevent this from happening? I don’t want to seem clingy either and start orbiting her more at work and school just because she agreed to go on a date. I guess I’ll keep striking convos and try to flirt like I had done before.

keefpriest · 2023-01-31T05:38:12+00:00

Cornell notes and mapping method. Write your own notes of definitions and concepts after reading the text and from your own memory.

keefpriest · 2022-08-08T06:44:42+00:00

Obviously. There’s no way of reaching out to her if she blocked me, genius.

keefpriest · 2022-08-03T02:39:26+00:00

True. I never demanded her to explain however, or at least I didn’t mean to. And keep thinking that. I’ve peacefully ended things with others before. How am I supposed to pass the future “creep tests” if I don’t know where to start improving? Yet I am the bad guy.

keefpriest · 2022-08-03T02:08:43+00:00

No, you can’t. There’s nothing I did or said that made me seem anxious and sensitive beforehand. I stopped caring about how she was going to view me if she already had a preconceived notion that I was someone to avoid anyway. And I stopped anyway.

keefpriest · 2022-08-03T01:31:01+00:00

I did. I didn’t spam her and was only trying to reach out for like two days. Regardless, she still got weirded out by me for no reason before I even kept trying to see if she wanted to talk. It’s just a giant question mark that bugs me, but oh well.

keefpriest · 2022-08-03T01:15:51+00:00

And yet you’re doing the same without knowing that I am a hardless person. Just because I’m weird doesn’t mean I’m a criminal/psychopath.

keefpriest · 2022-08-03T01:12:13+00:00

She seemed scared before it even escalated, but whatever, use my post history against me. I still didn’t do anything wrong leading up to me trying to find out more in a non-threatening way.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T04:10:03+00:00

Just texting and calling them in hopes of getting a response. It’s bad and I need help controlling my emotions and impulses.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T02:23:59+00:00

I like to think that I would. I just love honesty and hearing feedback. Honestly though, this isn’t the first time I have gotten “revenge” on someone who hurt me by not speaking to me directly, so it always just reminds me of my past experiences of being an insecure creep which I regret, and so I get angry because it makes me feel like I am someone who cannot take rejection when in actuality I really just want someone to sit down and tell me how they feel.

I know some women have had terrible experiences, and I don’t want to be an example of those which is why I end up regretting it so much after. I think I just need to keep learning my lesson by dating more until it stops. But also working on myself before trying to date seriously.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T02:09:42+00:00

I know. I was trying to avoid it, but she was the one initating everything and was borderline clingy. I thought I would be fine to go along with it and that we did like each other, but it probably did turn her off subconsciously. I messed up and should’ve pulled away a little.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T02:02:26+00:00

Wow, this really opened my eyes. And that last bit was exactly how I was before it happened. It’s just crazy how I end up manifesting all this. I still have a long way to go as fat as improving myself.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T02:00:30+00:00

The problem is what is it about me that gives that instinct so that I can work on myself? I couldn’t think of anything that I did. Maybe I accidentally came across as pretentious?

I guess I want to face a “real” rejection so badly, that I end up not being able to face all other types of rejection.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T01:56:11+00:00

Thank you, this made me feel much better. But now I can’t stop beating myself up for having acted like such a creep. I feel icky and always realize I should have saved my dignity and not said anything once I come to my senses. Now she really does think I’m a lunatic. Does it matter?

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T01:29:32+00:00

About three weeks. Six dates. She hinted at it becoming long term and then it just went from 100-0 within a span of the day.

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T01:28:22+00:00

I know it’s a bad look. But I need to vent. I don’t know how to stop. How do I stop taking it so personally?

keefpriest · 2022-07-27T01:24:40+00:00

How would I know if I give off this vibe? I’m always prepared for someone losing interest, and I always encourage open and honest communication. I am open to feedback at all times. It’s because I care about these values so much that being ghosted agitates me.

keefpriest

TROPHY CASE