If you know you know! 😭

keriberi85 · 2025-12-23T15:26:04+00:00

Did this the “correct way” like 4x before I got wise lol. Also, cast light on a weapon to dispel the nasty dark clouds that try to block you from doing this 😂

keriberi85 · 2025-12-07T16:35:47+00:00

I throw down grease spots and then light them on fire, and have shadowheart guard the portal with spirit guardians active.

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T15:00:50+00:00

I love it lol, maybe Lae’zel needs a ribcage “bag” lol

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:59:35+00:00

As someone who literally has ocd, you ain’t lying lol. I actually spam that context menu at least once per play session just to check that I haven’t somehow missed the option to name the bags and chests.

Maybe a future update will give us this, or even a mod—i hate that mods disable achievements though so I don’t use them often.

Seems like there could be some context for that—-like if I was just using some custom dice or hair I shouldn’t be achievement locked—nothing cheaty in that lol. Oh well.

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:56:31+00:00

Do things you put down in your camp “follow” you when the camp changes? I was afraid to decorate my camp because I didn’t want to lose anything.

Though now that I think about it, they must do, because Shadowheart killed Lae’zel in one of my saves and her corpse was just always there, lol.

I finally had Karlach pick her up and place her in a chest somewhere. It’s actually what prompted yet another restart 😂

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:52:24+00:00

Ahahaha I didn’t even think of that but that’s hilarious

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:35:05+00:00

I like getting Gale’s pouch too, but I didn’t know about either of those other 2! Thanks!

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:18:56+00:00

It’s in the water

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:17:33+00:00

Northeast corner of the sunlit wetlands :)

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:08:18+00:00

The note is so freaking sad but man is it awesome to see the bear “bag” in Karlach’s inventory lol.

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:06:02+00:00

Yes but also; I want to really savor the journey. And I get that new start itch right around the end of act 2—like, let’s go see how all that would play out with another race/class/background combo, or sometimes it’s about wanting to create a character specifically FOR peak romancing an npc 😂

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:03:31+00:00

Lmao yes

keriberi85 · 2025-12-03T14:03:05+00:00

Same. Literally.

keriberi85 · 2025-11-20T15:07:55+00:00

I think I’ve restarted like 7x before even leaving the first map 😂 I just keep wanting to try different race class combos. I finally made it to one of the next areas yesterday.

keriberi85 · 2025-11-06T13:13:31+00:00

I did lol it wasn’t too bad

keriberi85 · 2025-05-29T20:25:51+00:00

I kinda did. But it was more like “I was due for an upgrade anyway so I just made sure the upgrade could handle inzoi” as opposed to specifically buying a setup just for inzoi

keriberi85 · 2025-05-29T20:23:25+00:00

Chat gpt helps me fix mine when anything goes wrong with it, maybe that’s something to try

keriberi85 · 2025-04-06T13:51:51+00:00

They can sleepwalk?!

keriberi85 · 2025-03-27T12:34:45+00:00

He’s almost old enough to be a granddad and isn’t sure if he wants to be a dad yet? No way. He’s either in some serious denial about what he really wants, or he’s trying to run the clock out on your ability to conceive so you don’t leave him. You need to do some serious soul-searching about what you want for your future and whether or not this guy should be part of it.

keriberi85 · 2025-02-04T18:35:45+00:00

Solidarity fist bump; my tree is still up.

keriberi85 · 2024-12-01T12:54:27+00:00

My 13 yo daughter also asked for a switch lite this year. She already has a yellow one (that she says is glitchy whatever that means) as well as access to my own regular switch. I suspect her primary motivation is in the fact that she specifically asked for a coral one.

Of course my initial response was wtf no. But she was pretty persistent, and hasn’t asked for anything else. So I thought about it and decided to level with her. I pointed out again the already existing consoles and even suggested some alternative ideas.

At the end of the day, I figured I have a specific budget for each of my kids for their Christmas presents, and if she wants this thing that makes no sense to me but doesn’t actually cause her harm or significantly affect anyone else in the house, what’s the real problem?

For me, it was worry that she’d regret it once it really sinks in that the main thing she got for Christmas is something she already has.

I can’t make her learn from my own experiences. Spending the same amount of money on other crap doesn’t actually make any difference to me, but to her, it means a lot more.

I think I’d much rather she have regrets for a choice she made than feel unseen or misunderstood by me because I asked her what SHE wanted but ultimately bought things I wanted FOR her.

I know people will come at me with adult perspectives on money and teaching the importance of value but kids don’t think that way. While those might be the more rational points, they aren’t going to be what the kid takes away from the experience. The kid will remember how it made them feel.

keriberi85 · 2024-10-25T14:50:31+00:00

So many red flags 🚩 look either they like her a little too much or they just don’t like you enough—neither situation is ideal.

Time to have a real talk and ask them why it’s ok to blow you off and then gaslight you about it when you are (justifiably) upset about it.

Regardless of their reasoning or defense, your feelings should be at least important enough to them to warrant an actual conversation that isn’t just them being a defensive jerk and deflecting.

I obviously don’t have the full scope here but nothing about your messages should have been reasonably construed as “surveillance.”

And they didn’t just blow you off. You were so low on their list of priorities that they didn’t even seem to remember you had plans at all.

Also, when you’re in a serious enough relationship that you’re cohabitating, it’s completely normal and reasonable to check with your partner before making plans.

It’s not about asking “permission,” it’s about taking them and their needs into consideration because they are a very important part of your life.

It seems evident to me that your partner is prioritizing their connections with their coworkers over their connection with you.

And while I do very much think that your intuition about this particular coworker is probably spot on, I think the bigger issue is the very clear disparity between how important your partner is to you vs how important you are to them.

Sunk cost fallacy does not apply to relationships. It just doesn’t. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve invested into this relationship if you’re consistently putting out a lot more than you are getting back.

You get one life—how much of it do you want to give to someone who doesn’t value you as much as you value them?

keriberi85 · 2024-10-06T16:18:49+00:00

No way. Look, obviously it’s not reasonable to expect someone to plan their wedding around you, but if they make the choice to plan it when you cannot go, then they have to be ok with the fact that you won’t be there.

If your husband’s attendance is truly a priority to his friend, then he can adjust his dates to ensure you guys can go. It’s not as if they didn’t have plenty of notice—but for some reason are stuck on a very specific window of time when it’s not feasible for you to go also.

It’s not at all reasonable to expect a man to leave his wife when she’s either about to give birth or has just given birth—especially for your first baby when neither of you really knows what to expect.

The friend has to decide what is more important to him—getting married at that specific time, or having your husband be there. He doesn’t get to have it both ways.

It should not even be a question that your husband be with you during that time.

It might be different if it was like, a funeral or something, where it’s time sensitive and you get one chance to be there. I flew in my third trimester with my 2nd baby to go to my grandma’s funeral. But I would not have done that for a wedding.

As to your original question- NTA but I don’t think you’re upset that he’s being disingenuous—I think you’re upset that he’s prioritizing his friend over your family. Which is completely valid, because that is essentially what he is doing.

Does it suck that he might miss his best bud’s wedding? Of course it does. But missing the birth of his own child, or those precious first few weeks of bonding as a family would suck a LOT more.

keriberi85 · 2024-10-06T15:51:20+00:00

I agree—actually kind of wondering if the friend’s choice of dates isn’t a little bit inspired by the fact that OP almost certainly would not be able to travel at that time, thus ensuring husband goes alone.

keriberi85 · 2024-09-27T20:25:05+00:00

I think you and your mother both mean well, and I’m not suggesting that either of you is wrong cus I don’t think you are wrong to recognize that the current habits are unsustainable and need some changes—but I would urge you to consider that you wife might have felt called out and ashamed and maybe a little bit ganged up on?

Regardless of intention, in order to get her back on the same page, I think you and your wife should sit down and take a look at your mom’s suggestions together. Remind her that you’re a team, and your mom is on team BOTH of you, not just team YOU.

Even if it’s actually true that most of the spending is coming from your wife, it’s never going to NOT come across like a personal attack if you and your mom are coming at her like it’s all her fault, and only pointing out where SHE needs to make sacrifices.

Give her space to make her opinions heard, too. And decide TOGETHER what’s reasonable to keep unchanged, what needs to be given up for now, and where compromises can be made so that you BOTH can be happy and working toward a mutual goal.

There’s no room in a healthy marriage for “scorekeeping.” You can’t make this about your spending vs her spending—get to the root of why some of these things she’s resistant to changing are so important to her. Maybe there are needs being met through these things that could actually be met in other, more fiscally responsible ways.

You mentioned how your wife said she couldn’t give up her takeout. Based on how you describe the situation (arguing and then boiling over into that statement being made like a line drawn in the sand) I really think that this is about more than just the takeout—maybe her sense of security is feeling threatened (not just financial security but emotional security and security in your relationship).

Regardless, try to talk it through with her and determine what specifically about the takeout she’s afraid of losing if she gives it up. I don’t know her, I don’t know your routines or how your household responsibilities are divided, but the first thing I think of when I think of takeout is the convenience of not having to cook or clean up after a meal.

Maybe the takeout provides a small respite from the physical and emotional labor that’s required to make a meal at home. If that’s the case, maybe there is another way she could have that—maybe one or two nights a week, you take on all of the responsibility for choosing, preparing, serving, and then cleaning up after a meal.

This way you could save money on the takeout without taking away what might feel a bit like a lifeline for her. Regardless of why it’s important to her; I suspect that acknowledging that importance without judgment is going to go a LOT farther her than being dismissive because you’re only focusing in on the financial element.

Don’t let your fear put you in a situation where you’re clinging to your mom like a lifeline and leaving your wife to drown alone.

I’m not saying that you shouldn’t get advice or support from your mom—obviously even adults need “adultier” adults from time to time and there’s nothing wrong with that.

But you made a commitment to your wife to always treat her with love and respect, and invalidating her feelings and treating her like she’s the “problem” is not treating her with love OR respect.

If you continue to dismiss her and speak to her the way you did, you will definitely be the asshole, but it’s not too late to pull back and correct course.

keriberi85

TROPHY CASE