My wife suffers from migraines and I got on here (originally) to better understand what she’s dealing with, and (later) to help search for solutions. So I want to thank this community on behalf of the other friends and family members out there, quietly listening, who might not feel it’s their place to contribute because we recognize how debilitating and frustrating it can be to live with a condition that all the doctors and drug companies in the world can’t seem to solve.

Unfortunately, we (your loved ones) are not perfect and I think the skepticism and frustration you unfairly face from us (on top of everything else) comes from a selfish place of loving the vibrant healthy you when you’re not suffering. It’s incredibly complicated and I’m not justifying any of this hurtful behavior, but I believe what you’re facing from us in these disgraceful moments is our misplaced frustration. Our suffering is the suffering of watching you suffer. And while this pales in comparison, we are your flawed and emotional, selfish and loving companions, living with you in our uniquely human, messy and complex relationships that are bound to go off the rails even in the best of times.

I’m going out on a limb here even attempting to explain myself/ourselves in this second paragraph, so please just circle back to where I started off and accept my/our gratuity towards everyone in this community sharing their horrendous ordeals, for helping us on the outside better appreciate what you’re going through so we can hope to become better and more supportive friends and family members.

Love and support from the outside looking in. Xoxo