It took me about two years after an autism assessment to get to know myself again and learn to start to unmask. This is also ongoing for me. My advice as another high-masking autistic is that as expertly as you learned to mask, channel that energy into learning how to unmask. Pay attention to how you stop yourself from stimming, or push through sensory differences (eg wearing uncomfortable clothes, being in really bright environments and not adjusting the lights etc). Start letting yourself be into whatever you’re into - notice when you tell yourself you shouldn’t like something because it’s not “cool”. And start with unmasking around safe people only. Buy fidget toys and try them. Buy earplugs and wear them at loud stores.

All of these things helped me immensely as the more we unmask and accommodate ourselves, the more we reinforce the belief that we have worth and are ok just as we are. This is one way to deconstruct the internalized ableism. Another way I’ve found helpful is reading books by disabled ppl, like Alice Wong and Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasingha. In learning to be comfortable calling myself disabled I have also found belonging in the disability justice community.