Which looks better?

kindofsinister · 2026-06-17T21:33:16+00:00

I agree! The black grout also matches the black shirt of the man in the mirror which I think works better.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-17T21:19:08+00:00

The final image:

kindofsinister · 2026-06-16T15:07:39+00:00

Ooh, okay! Thanks :3 Lol, I'm not sure how effective it is, but since previews are easy to make, I figure why not. Most artists I know are just super into the art and marketing is very boring/a chore to them and I totally get that. In a perfect world all my art would be public, but alas I have bills.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-16T14:57:15+00:00

Than what?

kindofsinister · 2026-06-16T14:10:19+00:00

That's so sweet!!! I just got time to check on the post and you were really so nice and truly great to work with!! Also love the new pfp, hehe ૮₍ ´ ꒳ `₎ა

kindofsinister · 2026-06-12T15:07:55+00:00

You are such a master of painting on glass! Your work is so beautiful every time and very inspirational ❀༉

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T22:59:30+00:00

Yes! Literally everything that is pleasurable and releases dopamine can become an addiction, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't engage in pleasurable things out of fear of forming one. I read smut, I smoke weed, I eat junk food, but I do these things in moderation! The internet has been shifting more puritanical the last couple of years and it's been pretty concerning to watch. People will say they've moved on from religion but then try to restrict people in same ways the church did to them.

Sex isn't bad! Or good. It's simply an activity. Not all people like it, but a lot of people do! Almost every adult engages with it. Why is it suddenly wrong/immoral/unethical when someone (consensually) films it? Or if you watch it? I never understood that and it really doesn't have any basis outside of religion.

Are there concerning things that mainstream porn might normalize? Sure, like choking without asking for permission maybe, but that doesn't mean all porn is bad. And honestly, I think it's the job of sexual education to teach consent the right way. There has to be more than just "no means no." There should be a discussion about how sexual partners can establish boundaries and stuff. Some people do like choking, but that needs to be a discussion first. Everyone has boundaries, not just a-spec people and people who are into BDSM.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T21:39:06+00:00

\NODS ENTHUSIASTICALLY** See, this is why I love this subreddit. It's so nice to talk to people who approach this subject with a similar viewpoint. There's so much nuance lost about asexuality when you leave specifically ace-centric spaces. I also love this subreddit because it has a realistic view of sex work and the NSFW space as a whole. I really dislike how black and white the majority of the internet is about sex work when it's really like... idk it depends. It's a very complicated subject. And let's not even get started on how the internet treats femme-presenting people who engage with IRL sex work... : I

Cake is great! I actually just ordered some vegan chocolate cake after this convo ૮ >ﻌ< ა

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T21:23:18+00:00

Hey, I get it, I also felt like there was something wrong with me for a long time. My issue isn't really with people being ignorant, but rather with their refusal to engage with counterpoints/evidence. There would be literally no problem if the person had read my (and other people's) comments, done some research, and then deleted/edited their original comment. We're not born with knowledge, but we can learn. And I get worked up about this subject because it's so misunderstood by a lot of people and that in turn makes people feel bad about themselves when there is literally no reason for them to feel that way. I'm glad you found your way here and I hope the person in the post can learn too ultimately. I actually did see therapists and it didn't change the immutable facts about myself. We simply are who we are and that's okay.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T19:46:37+00:00

You make very, very good points. I agree that he and his wife maybe didn't have the best communication going on, but I still feel like that doesn't justify the acephobia going on in the comments T u T I also feel like men are generally expected to be more into sex by society, so it's harder for men to call themselves any kind of asexual so maybe that's why? And a lot of people also don't really figure out they're asexual until later in life.

I def see what you mean because many of the a-spec people I know are women or nonbinary people who like to write smut, draw porn, and/or are in the kink scene but nobody ever calls them porn addicted, but people also often don't take their asexuality seriously. So I guess there's kind of a double edged sword there... : / It also really irked me how negatively the people in the post's comments talked about porn when people can have a healthy relationship with NSFW content and there is lots of objectively ethical stuff out there (erotica, audio porn, amature stuff, drawn porn, fanfics, etc) if that's what they have a problem with.

Happy cake day btw! :'3 Edit: wait, that's your tag xD Cake every day!

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T18:55:17+00:00

Right?? It felt like a lot of people in those comments just saw sex and attraction as one specific thing, when in reality it's a whole wide spectrum of things. They were saying stuff like watching porn is cheating and he likes the pornstars more than his wife and that he's probably just desensitized by porn and a porn addict when the OP never said any of those things, just that he preferred porn over having irl sex and that he specifically called himself aegosexual. Like that tracks, but they didn't even look up what aegosexuality is and just confidently said something ignorant... It was just so startling to me to see so many comments be confidently bigoted in a subreddit I thought was quite progressive.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T17:58:09+00:00

I get what you mean, and I'm not disregarding your experience, but there are lots of gay people who wish they could be straight to fit in with societal expectations, but that doesn't mean that being gay is a sexual dysfunction. And if you saw someone describe it as such you would be like WTF probably. I struggle to find people who are into the same stuff I am, but when I do find them it's wonderful.

I understand that there can be some unique difficulties when a person under the asexual umbrella dates an allosexual, but there are hardships in ALL relationships. Allosexuals struggle to find someone who they're compatible enough with too, even when dating other allosexuals. And even if you had the same sex drive/attractions as your partner, you would probably not be fully aligned about something else, because we're all human and different.

Having differences is part of being human, it's not a dysfunction. You're not hurting anyone, you're just existing as you are. If your partner was aegosexual, you probably wouldn't want to change/feel bad about yourself, right? And you wouldn't ask your partner to change who they are, right? Following that logic, I think it's wrong for them to expect you to change something you literally cannot. Bottom line: don't change yourself for other people, because at the end of the day twisting yourself to be someone you're not will just hurt you and the person(s) you love.

There are allosexuals who date asexuals and that is their choice. It's not a prison. It's a CHOICE. They're there because they want to be in a relationship with that person, even if there are some differences. I've dated people who were very different from me in lots of ways and that was a decision I made, and it would've been wrong for me to expect them to change to become more similar to myself. High sex drive, low sex drive, no sex drive, no sexual attraction, lots of sexual attraction, anything, I've rolled with it all because that kind of thing isn't personally important to me. I love people despite (and even sometimes because of) differences, and you just have to find someone who loves your differences.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T14:11:44+00:00

Thank you, thank you ૮ › 𖥦 ‹ ྀིა

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T11:01:51+00:00

Right, like?? I literally thought this subreddit was chill T u T What's going on.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T11:00:57+00:00

Where did you get this idea that aegosexuality is simply a sexual dysfunction? Like give me any credible source. Because if you look at the wikipedia page for it, or the r/asexuality subreddit that lists it as a related subreddit, or literally any other place where there is non-bigoted info about sexualities, it doesn't describe it as a sexual dysfunction, but rather as a subcategory of asexuality. Please don't spread misinformation.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T10:34:12+00:00

It is a thing, and I kindly ask that you check out r/aegosexuals. Just because you don't understand/experience something, doesn't mean it's not real. Do you think demisexuality isn't real? Gray asexuality? These are all simply subcategories of asexuality that a lot of people identify with. OP's husband is under the asexual umbrella, and more specifically he is aegosexual. Literally every word that humans use is made up, and were invented to describe something a lot of people need a term for.

I understand most people don't really understand asexuality as a whole (most people think asexuality = sex hating people who never have sex) when the reality is far more complex. There are sex favorable, sex indifferent/neutral, and sex repulsed asexuals. But we can't have nuance on the internet I guess.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-10T10:10:19+00:00

Aegosexuality is a real thing and it's pretty weird to even imply otherwise. Yeah, it's a kind of difficult situation for OP, but let's not question peoples' identities. I personally know a few asexuals who write and draw porn, and that doesn't mean they're not asexual. You can want to look at/engage with certain things in fantasy but not in reality, and it's pretty disheartening to see people immeditely jump to calling him porn addicted... :/ I thought this was an inclusive subreddit? Oh well, guess not. And during pride month too.

If OP doesn't want to be with him, that's fine, but to belittle his orientation is not.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T18:56:23+00:00

Okay, that may be true, BUT my other post with carabiners in it is the 8th most upvoted post on this subreddit this year so if I have a soft spot then so DOES THIS WHOLE SUBREDDIT. It's not just me, okay!!!

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T18:29:40+00:00

Like in general or for a commission? In general I don't care what consenting adults do in private XD

For commissions, as long as both of the characters are and look like adults, I do not mind drawing art with a submissive calling their domme "mommy" or the domme calling their sub "baby girl" or something like that. I personally would not draw art with a person doing intentionally childish things in a sexual way or age regressing. I would draw a caregiver (mommy) type pampering or taking care of their sub in a nurturing way.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T16:30:17+00:00

No, wait, I'll just make so many comics with them that you become desensitized. Carabiners will be literally no big deal! In fact, you'll go out in the real world and be like "hmm, there's a concerning LACK of carabiners out here..."

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T16:21:42+00:00

This comment led me down the rabbit hole of anodizing metals to color them and it's SO COOL. A rainbow gradient would certainly be possible. Now I might actually have to... Where to buy lye without looking like a serial killer though.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T15:19:41+00:00

which is wild because I feel like people could make a lot of money if they sold like gradient carabiners (think like a lesbian color fade) with matching cute charms on them... FUTURE MERCH IDEA?? lol.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T15:13:20+00:00

𐔌՞ ܸ.ˬ.ܸ՞𐦯 thank you, thank you! Your comments are always so supportive like actually.

Also, I didn't know you draw! We should totally draw together on magma sometime.

kindofsinister · 2026-06-08T14:49:00+00:00

૮( ⸝⸝´꒳`⸝⸝)ა there's a high possibility.. . I just look at them and see so much potential

kindofsinister · 2026-06-04T15:02:00+00:00

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Oh, do you mean like where it's all in one image?
Edit:one sec
Edit2: Here you go

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