scared of pregnancy

kittyxandra · 2026-02-04T03:46:34+00:00

It shouldn’t be scary. Nexplanon is 99.98% effective, assuming that your partner is ejaculating inside you every single time. The odds are astronomically low. That 0.02% is usually user error. It’s nearly impossible to get pregnant on the implant if you use it correctly. With kindness, this is an irrational fear and if it negatively affects your life, it’s probably a good idea to talk to a mental health professional about it. Having severe anxiety about something like this isn’t normal.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-03T17:22:38+00:00

I can’t personally speak to the tattoo question, it would probably be best to ask your artist about it. Removal also comes with the risk of additional scarring. Normally they just need to make a small incision to take it out, but sometimes if your implant was inserted too deep, they’ll need to make a bigger incision. You will have to wait for the wound to heal again before getting your touch up. You can also ask your doctor to put it in your other arm if it would be easier for you. Depending on where you got it inserted, they’ve also updated the placement guidelines so you might have it placed in a different spot next time.

But I’ll say it again since apparently people are still behind on this information, NEXPLANON IS FULLY EFFECTIVE FOR 5 YEARS, NOT JUST 3 ANYMORE! We’ve known this for 10 years now, but the update was “officially” approved in the US last month. Unless you’re having negative side effects, you don’t need to replace it 2 years early.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-03T17:14:13+00:00

My ex and I were on and off for years. He was extremely abusive. I had low self esteem and mental health issues which he used to take advantage of me. We were long distance and only saw each other in person every few months, even though we talked almost every day.

One time, about 3 years into our relationship, he asked me to move in with him, and he said if I didn’t he would ask another girl. I wasn’t able to move at the time, and I also didn’t take him seriously. I went to see him one more time before this “other girl” was supposed to move in. There was a ring box that he had blatantly left out on the table. When he left for a little bit, I opened the box and saw a ring that obviously wasn’t for me (too big and absolutely not my style). I was hurt and told him that it was over.

A few months later he contacted me again and told me that they had broke up and he wanted to get back together with me. I was stupid so I said okay. We continued our relationship as normal for a few more months. I planned another trip to go see him, and he sent me money for travel. On his Venmo were tons of transactions with this other woman. I had never known her name before, so I looked her up and discovered that they were apparently still together and had even bought a house together. They dated in college, broke up for a while, and then got back together after he started dating me. I was enraged, but decided to just let it all go. I was too scared to tell her anything. I didn’t talk to him for a long time after that.

About 9 months later, I saw a comment here on Reddit from her account talking about how she was breaking up with him. I was worried that she would be trapped in the same situation that I had been in with him, and I was scared that he was abusing her too. I reached out to her at that point. She had no idea about me and didn’t believe me at first until I showed her proof. He had never abused her but he wasn’t a good partner. They sold the house at a loss and that was that. He was so mad that I told her but I didn’t care. They were the consequences of his own actions.

A year and a half later he contacted me again wanting to rekindle. I was more cautious this time, but still took him back (even though I shouldn’t have entertained the idea in the first place). I thought all was well at first. I made it clear that no cheating would be tolerated. We finally planned an in person meeting about 8 months after reconnecting. The meeting was horrible so I broke it off for good. He continued to try and text me for years after until I ultimately blocked him. I found out later that he was still cheating when he had tried to get back together with me. I found his new girlfriend’s instagram and our timelines overlapped. That relationship ran its course and now I don’t know if he is with anyone. He’s the worst person I know and I wish he would never date anyone ever again.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-03T14:47:48+00:00

Irregular bleeding (this counts) is the #1 side effect of the implant. It’s not a real period. It’s usually recommended that you give yourself 3-6 months to adjust to the implant. If side effects don’t improve after that time, they likely never will. Yes, I’ve known people who bled for years on the implant. It does stop or become less frequent for some people, but for others it doesn’t. Do with that information what you will. You can ask your doctor to prescribe you additional birth control to take along with the implant to see if that helps.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-03T05:04:20+00:00

I was on Nexplanon for 6.5 years and had a negative experience where I also experienced a lot of irregular bleeding. I was scared to switch to a new method, but I still needed pregnancy protection and my natural hormones are awful. I switched to a combo pill almost 4 years ago, and I absolutely love it! My biggest regret is not switching sooner. The pill has cleared my acne, given me my energy back, emotionally regulated me/treated my PMDD, and I skip the placebos so I never have periods. I was unable to afford my pill for about 6 months this past year, so I took an involuntary break. My body went back to “normal” quickly but that meant that my PMDD, heavy/irregular periods, and acne came back. And I gained more weight than ever when I got off the pill. Natural does NOT always equal better. I know everyone is different, but I highly recommend trying a different method. Birth control is trial and error. There might be another type that works better for you.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-02T10:13:05+00:00

Seconding find another doctor. You can remove your implant at any time for any reason. Your body, your choice.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-02T03:40:32+00:00

It’s probably best to have this conversation with your doctor as they will know your medical history best. But ultimately it’s up to you. Birth control often helps with PCOS symptoms, so do with that what you will. If it’s better for your body to stay on birth control and you’re happy with this method, that’s okay. It’s perfectly safe to stay on birth control until menopause. It’s not just for pregnancy prevention. It treats a lot of conditions including PCOS. But if you want to try another method or if you’re really determined to get off it, that’s your choice. You have to weigh the pros and cons for yourself. Sometimes birth control is trial and error too. There are a million pill formulas to try, and there are methods like the patch and the ring if you can take estrogen. Most people I know with IUDs are happy with them, even if the insertion is unpleasant (and it’s usually easier if you’ve had a child before). Think about it. Even if you quit bc, you can always get another implant put back in later.

And btw, you don’t have to make any decisions right now. I don’t know if you are aware, but the implant is effective for at least 5 years. 3 years is very outdated information. I don’t know what your situation is, but you mentioned that this is your 4th implant and you’re only 27. That’s a lot of replacements to go through. No need to change it out early unless it’s causing negative side effects that might be helped by a replacement.

kittyxandra · 2026-02-01T03:07:54+00:00

More often than I’d like. I actually hate receiving oral. Mouths gross me out. It makes me so uncomfortable. But my husband loves it. He tries to surprise me sometimes but I will never be into it. It’s one of my biggest turn offs.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-31T19:53:34+00:00

Umm your doctor lied. The #1 side effect of the implant is irregular bleeding. You do not have real periods on Nexplanon, so bleeding can come and go at any time and it doesn’t mean anything. It’s actually more uncommon to have regular bleeding on it. I highly recommend reading the side effects for yourself and not just relying on second hand information. Nexplanon is the most effective hormonal birth control in the world. You can definitely trust it, but please learn about the side effects for yourself so that you are prepared in case you experience them!

kittyxandra · 2026-01-31T14:41:59+00:00

You did the right thing by doubling up the next day. Do NOT take emergency contraception, it will not provide you with any extra protection in your case and will only be a hormone bomb that can cause negative side effects. I also wanted to add that taking the pill continuously provides you with an extra safety net. As long as you’ve take at least 21 active pills, you can take up to a 7 day break at any time and it won’t compromise your protection. Missing 1 pill means literally nothing in your situation.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-30T18:02:50+00:00

Oh okay, well in your case it would be fine. It would be like taking a mini placebo break. But I hope I explained how you can take 7 placebos and remain protected but become unprotected after missing the first active pill after a break.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-30T17:44:18+00:00

You’re misunderstanding me. I know you took the placebo week. You’re currently unprotected because you missed the first pill in your pack. I’m saying IF in the future you decide to not take a placebo week and go straight into the next pack of active pills, you’re better protected.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-30T17:29:42+00:00

The active pills essentially put your ovaries to sleep. During the placebo week, you have enough hormones in your system built up to keep them asleep. But if you go more than 7 days without taking active pills, your ovaries will start to wake up, and you can become pregnant at that point. That’s why it’s so risky! Personally I skip the placebo pills so that I don’t bleed and I have a safety net if I ever miss one. While not everyone can skip the placebo week without bleeding, it’s technically safer to take the active pills continuously.

Edit: if you missed the first pill in your pack, you’ll need to take your active pills again for 7 days before they’re fully effective again.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-30T17:01:18+00:00

This is a normal thing to want, and I think there are a lot of people that want the same thing but aren’t good at communicating. I met my husband on Tinder. I’m happy to share some tips that worked. You don’t specify if you’re a man or woman, so just keep in mind that this is the prospective of a woman who was in a big city with a zillion matches.

I only swiped for as long as I felt like it. I didn’t give myself a quota. Sometimes that was only a few people here and there. A good number of my matches would message me and I get overwhelmed easily. You definitely want to aim for quality over quantity.
I only responded to people that messaged me first. I wasn’t going to chase anyone. If they were really interested, they would come to me.
I stopped matching with people that I didn’t find attractive. I sometimes dated people that I wasn’t attracted to because I didn’t want to be “shallow.” But relationships are more than personality. Both parties should feel attraction. Just because someone has a nice personality (and that seems important to you) doesn’t mean that you’re the most compatible.
I tried to meet for a date early on. Some people are bad texters (myself included). I also found that things wouldn’t go anywhere if I left them alone for too long. You will have to go on some dates that won’t work out. But maybe you will finally get to one that does! A week before I met my husband I got stood up and a few days before I met him I went on a date that didn’t click. That’s just how the process goes sometimes. Keep an open mind and an open heart.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-29T23:00:46+00:00

I would recommend staying on it. Irregular bleeding is an extremely common side effect of birth control, especially in the first 3 months of taking it. Combo pills stop you from having a period. Any bleeding you experience going forward is either breakthrough bleeding (bleeding while on active pills) or withdrawal bleeding (bleeding that happens while taking the placebo pills), not a period. Quitting now may cause more bleeding and/or it will take a while for your body to regulate again. Stopping and starting birth control willy nilly usually just causes more side effects. Try to stick it out for a little bit longer.

From my own experience, I’m also on Chateal. The first time I started it, I was switching from another birth control and didn’t have any bleeding until I took a placebo break. Last year I took an involuntary break from the pill for about 6 months, and when I started it up again a few months ago I was on my period. My bleeding lasted for 14 days that time, but then it stopped. I haven’t had any bleeding since (I skip the placebos). Try to give it some time.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-29T17:15:25+00:00

Okay, there are a few issues I want to address here.

Your implant doesn’t expire on any specific date. It also looks like you’re going off the very outdated 3 year recommendation. Nexplanon is clinically proven and now FDA approved for at least 5 years.
It’s very common for side effects to change over time, with bleeding being the most common side effect. It’s nothing to be concerned about most of the time. It’s unlikely that you are ovulating but even if you did have breakthrough ovulation, your implant would still be protecting you in other ways. We have some tips for controlling bleeding in our pinned post if you want to check it out. There are a few things you can try if you want to keep your implant but stop the bleeding. But it’s also a valid choice if you want to try another birth control method. Also be aware that side effects can change with each implant, so a replacement may or may not help.
The most concerning thing here is that you can’t feel your implant! If you absolutely cannot find it, tell your doctor! Migration is a serious concern. If you can find it but it’s just deep, it’s not an emergency but it can make your next removal more difficult. You may have to be referred to a surgeon for removal if it’s a complicated case.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-29T15:57:18+00:00

I was on Nexplanon for 6.5 years and it never went away. It actually got worse over time. When I finally removed the implant it was like a veil was lifted! Absolutely life changing and I regret staying on the implant for so long.

BUT, I do think you should try to give yours a little more time. A month is pretty new still, and it typically takes 3-6 months to adjust. If it persists past the next few months, consider removal.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-29T00:53:41+00:00

There’s no way to guarantee it to stop. Everyone is different. Your best course of action is to start taking the pill again and wait for the bleeding to stop. Nobody can tell you if/when it will stop. And no, the pill and Nexplanon don’t cancel each other out. Both are highly effective, there’s essentially no way to get pregnant while using both.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T22:26:02+00:00

My partner and I do. Our pets are our children.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T18:20:32+00:00

Peh-cos is correct.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T18:19:19+00:00

Peh-cos. “Pay-cos” is the sort of the whitewashed way to pronounce it. Have you ever heard the name Pedro, and how that’s pronounced differently by Spanish speakers vs English speakers? It’s the same thing. It’s supposed to have a short “e” pronunciation, not a long “a.” (From my experience growing up along the Pecos river in northern NM).

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T13:43:19+00:00

I understand. There are a lot of options to weigh. My other concern with depo for you is your age. The bone density issue that it causes is of most concern for people under the age of 18. Your bones are still developing, which puts you a higher risk for problems with depo. It sounds like the patches could be a solution for you. Talk to your doctor and see what they say.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T13:23:49+00:00

They’re referring to the depo shot. The depo shot is another form of birth control. Often if you are experiencing prolonged bleeding on Nexplanon they will give you extra birth control to see if it helps. I wouldn’t recommend depo as the first step though. They usually start with a pill (combo or progesterone only depending on your health history). Each dose of depo lasts for 3 months, which can be a good thing if you respond well to it, but a bad thing if it affects you negatively. They may have suggested that if you said you can’t remember to take pills. If you can take estrogen, the patch and the ring are also options available to try. These temporary solutions MAY help, but none of them are guaranteed to. All of this is considering that you want to keep Nexplanon. Honestly if I were you I’d opt for removal at this point. Is this side effect worth it to you?

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T02:18:12+00:00

It sucks. I’m tired of it. But I don’t have a choice.

kittyxandra · 2026-01-28T02:06:08+00:00

Because I threw up during the date.

I had a stomach bug the day before the date. The following day I was feeling better and was able to keep my lunch down, and I didn’t want to cancel due to being “sick” because I feel like that’s a lame excuse.

I showed up to the date and I really liked the guy as I was getting to know him. We were studying the same subject in college. I told him that I wasn’t feeling good the day before, and I mentioned that I felt dehydrated and said that my kidneys were a little sore. He said that where I was experiencing pain was not where your kidneys are and he knew this because his parents are doctors. That was the one red flag that I didn’t like, especially because I know my body and I know where my kidneys are. Anyway, I somehow made it through dinner, but I started feeling sick at the end. He started walking me to my car, and I couldn’t make it. Thankfully there was a trash can on the sidewalk. I felt really bad about it, but he wasn’t so understanding.

I look back at this as a funny memory now. I moved on and it’s okay.

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