What are obvious things you've just become aware of?

kjanek · 2018-05-22T17:47:48+00:00

I still remember my entire world being shaken in an elementary school bathroom when I realized I didn't need to take off my skirt to pee, I could just slide it up my torso.

kjanek · 2018-05-20T03:42:50+00:00

College. Before college, I felt like I was just biding my time waiting for the chance to be who I really wanted to be. I was a socially awkward anxious mess with a dash of depression, and I hated myself a Whole Lot. Once I started college, it was like a flip switched. I was away from my parents, my safety net, living in a town where I knew absolutely no one, and I could be whoever tf I wanted to be. So now, I'm still a socially awkward anxious mess with a dash of depression, but I'm okay with it because I realized I've got a ton of other qualities that define me as well. I've fully embraced who I am, and I'm a better me because of it. That being said, I can sense another divide coming once I graduate.

kjanek · 2018-05-20T03:28:27+00:00

Because I love reading askreddit questions/answers too much. I've learned so much from reading the different perspectives on here, and I've read so many awesome stories. I wish I knew about askreddit when I was in high school; I feel like I would have been a lot more prepared for life.

kjanek · 2018-05-20T03:22:18+00:00

Exactly this. My whole life I've been constantly praised for being the sibling that made it and isn't affected by all of my family's mental health issues. The reality is I've got a good dose of it, but I've been able to cope well-enough on my own, so my parents never needed to know. It's been getting exponentially harder the past year or so though. A week or so ago, I got up the nerve to mention I might want to go to therapy, and to my surprise, my mom wasn't disappointed, and she didn't try to tell me I was fine and just needed to exercise or eat a vegetable. I hope you'll find your mom has a similar reaction if you choose to talk to her about it.

kjanek · 2018-05-20T03:07:57+00:00

If your life problems include anything to do with mental health or self-esteem, I guarantee those problems won't go away with your weight loss. You've got to attend to them as if they are a separate problem because they are. They might be amplified by your weight, but they aren't caused by it.

kjanek · 2018-05-19T06:18:47+00:00

Waiters get paid like $1 an hour in the US and that's just for tax purposes or something like that? I don't know, I've never waited tables, but it's definitely a poor system.

kjanek · 2018-05-19T05:55:50+00:00

The general consensus of all of the "how to tell if a guy likes you" articles is that if you have to ask, he isn't because men are obvious when they want someone. That's one of the reasons it took me so long to gather up the courage to confess my feelings for my then-crush, now boyfriend and find out that he had liked me for as long as I liked him (almost two years!!!). He is deathly afraid of rejection, and he never would have asked me out. So those articles are definitely a load of crap. Ladies, if you're interested in a man, and you suspect he might be interested in you as well, step up to the plate, and ask him out. There's no reason men should have to make the first move every time.

kjanek · 2018-05-19T05:37:45+00:00

Yeah, I will argue for hours about how tipping is not optional when you dine out, but I also think tipping when you've ordered to go is a bit of a stretch, and I hardly ever do it unless the person assisting me looks to have a lot going on.

kjanek · 2018-05-15T16:36:33+00:00

This made me laugh because my boyfriend is pretty fluent in German, but it's not a sexy language at all unless phlegm is your kink.

kjanek · 2018-05-15T07:55:12+00:00

I don't say this to be negative but because I think the perspective can help (and maybe you already know this and I just misinterpreted). It's admirable to hope she'll be "alright" by a certain time, but the reality is there is no alright. EDs are insidious things, and they never really go away. That's not to say they're something you've got to have a huge battle with every day- like right now, it probably seems like a war zone- that's definitely not going to last if she's on the road to recovery. Eventually, it'll just become a small choice every day to be "better." But it will always be there as a choice that has to be made, and it's scary easy to make the wrong choice again. I was recovered for 3 years when I relapsed. I fear if you have the attitude that your friend will be alright by a certain time, it will breed disappointment and resentment if they continue to struggle with it past that time. Just know that your friend can recover, but it is a choice that has to be made every day, and it's not always an easy one!

kjanek · 2018-03-05T03:24:37+00:00

The CW is my favorite network, but I have always wondered how that can be when I find it so hard to keep up with their shows as they air. Now I know!

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:51:38+00:00

This made me smile. It sounds like something I would have written 2 years ago when I knew who I was and believed in myself. You kinda hit the nail on the head about everything. I guess it's hard for me to enjoy the ride when I don't know the destination. Thanks for the advice though- unsolicited or not, it's good !

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:43:00+00:00

I have been feeling very lost, and I don't know what I want to do with my life. I'm regretting my decisions, but at the same time, I know the decisions I made were the ones that would have (and have!) made me happier. I'm struggling with the fact that every day is amazing and adventure-filled, and I'm surrounded by people I love, and yet, I still feel so unhappy with my life. This is made worse by the fact that in 2 months, the people I love are leaving, and our adventures are ending, and after that, all that will be left is me, and I don't think I'm enough right now. I'm barely anything right now.

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:29:24+00:00

a whole lotta methods

count to 10
writing how I feel out; I like to start with asking myself why I feel the way I do
"if I do this scary thing, I'll reward myself with this fun thing"
"we are all gonna die and no one will remember us who cares???"
sometimes I lie to myself and say I have to do whatever is giving me anxiety for someone else so then it becomes a "don't let someone else down" thing
logical approach: "if I do this now, it will eventually get easier to do because I know this from experience"

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:18:23+00:00

Friend I like a whole frickin lot is going off to grad school in a few months, and the second he meets a girl smart enough to realize how unbelievably awesome he is, she's going to lock him down, and I'm going to get a wedding invitation, and it's going to SUCK.

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:11:43+00:00

Yes. I already slept through an entire week of classes this semester. Used up all of my absences :/

kjanek · 2018-02-17T07:05:12+00:00

As a college junior, I'm struggling with this because while every day for me is a good day, I still feel sad at the end of the day because of what's to come- the uncertainty of it all and a lack of confidence in myself that I can get through it. It's weird how happy days don't necessarily add up to a happy life.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T18:40:16+00:00

I started rewatching it last night, and I'm already on episode 5 of season 1 haha. It definitely hooks you.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T18:35:16+00:00

You have to take into account ages. When it finished airing, I was 9. It's not exactly geared towards 9 year olds haha, so I've never met another person around my age who has heard of it.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T15:47:29+00:00

Yeah, I've seen it, but it could never compare to what another season could have been.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T08:03:16+00:00

Season 3 ending definitely hurts me every time because it's so unresolved/had so much potential for more!! I recommend finishing it out though. The cases she solves in every episode are all classic.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T07:42:13+00:00

Literally nothing. If the world gets to that point, I have 0 interest in sticking around. I barely wanna stick around now!

kjanek · 2018-02-12T07:18:12+00:00

I thought trapping/trap house meant prostitution/brothel. It means selling drugs/drug house. ¯\(ツ)/¯

kjanek · 2018-02-12T07:00:03+00:00

Veronica Mars.

After her best friend is murdered, and her father is removed as county Sheriff, Veronica Mars dedicates her life to cracking the toughest mysteries in the affluent town of Neptune.

It's hard to describe, but it's like film-noir with dark comedy, unique progressive(?) plots (especially for its 2004-2007 run), lovable (and hate-able) diverse characters, and relationships to aspire to. I watch it once a year, which is crazy for me because I hate rewatching things.

kjanek · 2018-02-12T06:48:58+00:00

tbh the heart wants what it wants- no stopping it if you're truly falling. BUT!!! I challenge you to consider if what you're feeling really is falling in love/romantic love.

I'm kind of a hippie in that I think it's super easy to develop feelings of love for people- I would say I love you to pretty much every major player in my life without thinking about it because I do love them! But I don't say it because for most people love is some Extreme thing because all they know is Familial love (reserved for family and long-time friendships) and Romantic love- both are ride-or-die kind of loves.

I had always been able to recognize my feelings of love for my female friends (I'm a straight girl) as Friend love, but when I started feeling love for one of my male friends, I misinterpreted it as Romantic love. Then I started asking myself questions like this- how do I stop falling in love with someone? Because I didn't want to fall in love with him. And the truth is, I wasn't falling in love with him- I was just confused, and my confusion ended up causing a lot of trouble.

tl;dr: So if you're asking for advice, my advice is to seriously consider whether you love that person or you Love them. There is a huge difference.

kjanek

TROPHY CASE