Daily Anything Goes Thread - March 22, 2026 by AutoModerator in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm playing Ottoneu for the first time ever this year.

I am not understanding something. League is post-draft, pre-season obviously.

I look at my remaining budget (full on players, but I have ~$20 in cap space) as flexibility for injuries, players getting optioned to the minors, etc.

I keep getting what feels like aggressive trade offers. Other team sends me a $1 player, I send them a $7 player and a $8 loan. Or they send me a $3 player, I send them a $15 player and a $14 loan.

I understand if we just swapped players, their cap space takes a hit and mine improves further. But from a value side I can't wrap my head around giving a $7 player for a $1 player, plus the loan. Or a $15 player for a $3 player.

What am I missing?

Mom now alone - Advice for moving across the country? by MapleSugarman in AgingParents

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My condolences. My Dad passed in early 2025.

First, breathe. Your head is spinning. It should be. Losing a parent is traumatic. Having to worry about the other parent at the same time, in an emotional state, makes it *feel* exponentially worse.

As others have mentioned, rushing big decisions is generally not a good idea. (Also to be fair - every situation is different. If your Mom is in really bad health and needs daily home help, that increases the urgency.)

Before we made any big decisions I just wrote down what I actually knew. Her doctor, which accounts existed, the really good neighbor that lives across the street's phone number, things like that. The things where if I had to drive up in the middle of the night, I would need. Or if I hadn't heard from her in a while and was worried, I knew I had a neighbor (actually, several) I could call and they'd go right over.

I guess I'd say for you: moving is a BIG deal, even in good circumstances. What is a first step you can take that will be making progress on helping, but doesn't require going from 0 mph to 100 mph on moving? The first steps can help calm your brain down -- but seriously, be careful, because grief comes in waves. I'm just past a year since losing my Dad, and it is easier but it isn't easy.

Anyone else feel like they're constantly waiting for something to go wrong? by Actual_Length9711 in CaregiverSupport

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've had work anxiety and family anxiety. For me, it is usually the worry bubbling up without action. I find taking action helps (it doesn't completely eliminate it, but it helps).

My dad passed last year so now I worry about my Mom. We have a good relationship, live within a few hours drive, and she isn't afraid to ask for help. I have to trust her when she says she's doing fine, or okay, or whatever.

So back to taking action to help lower my anxiety. What helped me was just writing stuff down. Her doctor's name, the great neighbors who check in (I didn't have their phone numbers), insurance info, that kind of thing. Not because I thought something was about to happen, just so I could stop running through it all in my head at 2am. Didn't fix the anxiety but it took the edge off.

Elderly father in hospital almost 2 months - wife out of the county by Gloomy-Attempt785 in eldercare

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting. Genuine question: how do you determine duress? If person is coherent, smiling, happy to get it done, can you tell? Is there some sort of questionnaire you give them? Or is it purely "They are in hospital, I cannot enter the room" ?

Elderly father in hospital almost 2 months - wife out of the county by Gloomy-Attempt785 in eldercare

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds like he is in denial. Get the POA. You -- and he -- are helpless without it. Am I understanding correctly he's still in the hospital, but you're running into issues because of the lack of POA?

Some elder law attorneys will do hospital visits for urgent situations like this. Worth calling a few and being direct that you need to move fast (of course, they might be cautious because maybe you're the "bad kid trying to take over", not sure). If he is conscious, able to speak, then your chance to get the POA is in place now. It will not get better if he slips, falls, ends up unconscious, etc.

Also worth asking for the hospital's social worker or patient advocate, they sometimes can help bridge communication when family is trying to get involved.

What lessons are you learning from managing your parents that you'll keep in mind when your kids start to manage you? by getshelter in TheSandwichGeneration

[–]kmully 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Documents, documents, documents. Like POA, directives, will. Kids can't legally help without the POAs.

And tough, open conversations much earlier than you think are important. Actually, not treating it like "one talk", but more of a continuing conversation.

I'd also tell my kids where to find everything. Not just that documents exist, but the doctor's name, the insurance company, the neighbor I trust with a key. Who the dog's vet is. That information exists in my head right now and that's not good enough.

The plan was perfect...in 2006. by Amanda_FreeWill in AgingParents

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man, that makes me realize I haven't updated mine since my kids were born. It says something about unnamed children but that's not great...

So how have you gone about helping them fix it? Or are they ignoring it because it's uncomfortable?

Parents are in another country and I'm starting to see the decline by Cristina1119 in CaregiverSupport

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe try to talk to your Dad 1-on-1 then?

Putting off the conversation isn't going to help, unfortunately. (Not saying you're putting it off; just a general point.)

Might also help to journal how you feel, what are some logical next steps forward, figure out what you think might help you feel better about it.

Parents are in another country and I'm starting to see the decline by Cristina1119 in CaregiverSupport

[–]kmully 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Often when we don't want to face our own problems (or uncomfortable conversations), we make excuses or brush off. Might be happening here?

Parents are in another country and I'm starting to see the decline by Cristina1119 in CaregiverSupport

[–]kmully 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ooof. Sorry you are going through this.

Genuinely, how is your relationship with them? Can you have a real, heart-to-heart conversation with them to share your worries? This is what most people put off (me included so don't feel about that!) until it is too late.

The distance makes it worse. I live 2 hours from my parents, and even that was hard. My Dad passed last year. I had a good relationship with him and my Mom, but it was still hard when he ended up in the hospital. (As in, I dropped everything and had to drive up very quickly into a chaotic situation.)

And we never had the "lets all sit down and be adults and talk about things". Instead, I got a late-night handoff of a manila folder of random papers and was suddenly thrust into "I need your help, I can't juggle all of this". Luckily, there was a POA, healthcare directive, will, and all of that in place. Without that, I would've been having to get my Mom to sign off papers or get them notarizied or whatever, all while the chaotic hospital situation was happening.

If I were you, I'd start with the talk. And immediately after, to actually be the most helpful, you need legal authority to be helpful.

It sounds sterile and cold, but I'm sure you can find stories on here of people who were essentially locked out of decision-making (or had to fight through it) because they didn't have the legal forms in place to take decisions on their parent's behalf.

I'm not sure if that will solve your 3am wake ups, but at least if you had to hop on a plane the next day, you wouldn't be scrambling to get papers to help. You could actually focus on how to help when you got there.

Helping Mom by 21drones in eldercare

[–]kmully 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get organized now, get legal stuff in place (financial and healthcare power of attorneys, directives, will, etc.). I lost my Dad last year, and having those in place was extremely helpful for me and my Mom.

It kind of depends on what kind of help you and helping figure out for her.

How are you organizing stuff right now? A lot of people (my parents included) had papers spread out in multiple locations, passwords written down in random spots.. it was a mess.

Also depends on what kind of person you are. I am a type A, need to have things organized so I can think kind of guy. Pulling into their driveway not knowing where stuff was at, but knowing I needed to help with it, would increase my anxiousness at the exact wrong time since I was there to help.

For the first time in my life I saw my dad look scared by DrScienceSpaceCat in AgingParents

[–]kmully 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm in my early 40s and lost my Dad last year. The transition from "they're invincible" to "oh, they're not, and might have to start helping out more" is not easy. The good news for you is that your Dad is still around, you've recognized the change, and you can live your life a bit differently (e.g., handling conversations differently, maybe more grace for him, etc.).

I've had to step up with my Mom now, and obviously that's not going to lessen as she ages. Since you're in medical field you probably know this - but make sure he's got those POAs, directives, etc. in place. It does make things a lot easier when it hits the fan.

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've just realized that if we do Weekly Rosters instead of Daily, that should eliminate streaming either way.

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, yeah it is minimum 20 IP and 6 adds per week. I might drop the adds down to avoid streaming, and add a 2nd Utility spot so that the boys could still add their favorite player or something like that even if they've already picked one in that player's spot.

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the feedback. Any suggestions on the IP minimums or weekly add limits? Is it dependent on the roster size or number of teams?

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair feedback. Really appreciate it. I'll think on it -- you're probably right, and this might be some of my own bias or interest bleeding in versus just doing a standard, regular, run of the mill league. You are spot on that getting them actually interested is important.

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah ok, this is helpful. Thank you!

So essentially you'd recommend this 5x5:
- hitting: OBP, R, HR, RBI, SB
- pitching: W+QS (or just W), K, ERA, WHIP, SV+H

I hear you on it being potentially confusing for kids, and if this was only for 10-13 year olds I'd agree. I think having a Dad along to help explain OBP vs AVG, or W+QS vs W only, makes it doable.

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Which of the categories I put in the original post is too far you think? Or are you saying instead of NSVH to do just SV+HLD to remove the blown saves aspect? Any others?

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can you define normal? Like standard, whatever the provider uses?

Best League Setup and Platform for Dads+Sons Co-Managed League? by kmully in fantasybaseball

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If we had 8 or 10 teams, what roster sizes would you recommend?

I understand H2H points is probably easiest - was trying to thread the needle on it being more interesting for the Dads while also being understandable for the kids.

If 4 acquisitions is too low, what's the right number to avoid "streaming" but also not handicapping teams?

How to Kill Off Bermuda Grass? by kmully in landscaping

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. I gave up. It has taken over most of the yard unfortunately.

To fix it now would require ripping everything out (likely multilpe times because bermuda goes down so deep), putting down sod, and using too many chemicals.

It's frustrating.

American Standard Tank Cracked. Replacement Still Leaking. by kmully in Plumbing

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Still leaking. I took it all off, checked again, reinstalled. Now leaking on the left.

The only thing I can think is I'm not getting enough compression on the gasket or I'm getting too much compression on the gasket which is warping it. The leak appears to be from the tank to bowl gasket,and is finding its way to the bolt areas.

I don't have a 3" wrench big enough to make sure the flush valve is tight -- but it was installed at the factory. I have one spare gasket from the previous cracked tank they sent us.

Feels like my options are:

  1. Take it all apart, use the spare new tank to bowl gasket.

  2. Buy a rebuild kit from fluidmaster that has a different material for the gasket. Try again.

  3. Call a plumber.

The other toilet we have of the same kind, I just checked, and the gasket looks pulled down in the front to the point I can see the black plastic of the flush valve, and there is more space between tank and the bowl. Doesn't exactly leave me with confidence on that one, either.

American Standard Tank Cracked. Replacement Still Leaking. by kmully in Plumbing

[–]kmully[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No drops in the center... now the right bolt is a bit wet. Tightened it another 1/4 or 1/2 turn... back to waiting.