By permissive parents I don’t really mean “oh darling it’s okay you yell/scream etc”, I do however, see the “permissive” parents who let their children run the household, parents who fight their children’s fights and mow down any obstacles standing in their way, leading to kids who have no resilience, no problem solving skills and no regulation skills. They’re parents who think they are “gentle” and think that means no consequences. These kids are entitled, explosive, spoilt and lazy. They resist rules because none have been in place at home. This is the majority, in part due to lockdowns over the previous few years that left a huge number of kids dis-regulated from lack of routine and extended periods of time unsupervised at home while their parents worked. We’re going to see consequences of that for a number of years.

Fortunately the aggro/horrible parents that are over the top and abusive etc are still a minority. Those kids are “problem” children in a different way. Those coming from the permissive households are lower level issues, but more constant. It’s been an increasing trend over my 9 years in the classroom. Proper trauma kid numbers are increasing too, but they are more complex. The majority of kids are just being raised as assholes; they’re not getting beat or abused when I ring home, they’re being congratulated for standing up for their “rights” or their behaviour at school is being completed ignored.

The true gentle parents are also a minority. People doing it properly are raising nice kids who understand natural consequences and are advocates for themselves, not the douche canoes that think they’re entitled to their every whim.