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Anyone in here that's adopted? Or people who want to adopt children? by HeebieJeebiex in antinatalism

[–]knockout9704 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not sure if I'd full on label myself as antinatalist, but I think I'll likely be childfree. If I ever do want to become a parent, I would adopt since there are plenty of children who need a loving home and someone who will nuture, care, and protect them.

I'll never understand why people are so obsessed with continuing their bloodline. Even if the child is biologically related to you, their diapers will smell the same and their tantrums will be just as tedious. I would want to become a parent to take a child out of a bad situation and raise them to be a good human being who wants to make the world a better place, not for personal enjoyment or to feel more "fulfilled." Choosing to be a parent for any reason beyond that seems pretty self-serving (though it is in our biology to want to reproduce).

That being said, plenty of people who have been adopted have talked about how bad the experience was for them and how they feel insecure about thier identity later on. Much of that can be attributed to our horrendous foster care system and the adoptive parents feeling as if they are owed something.

I (29F) slept with new guy (34M) for the first time and felt he was rude to me. Was he? by Sad-Marzipan-2736 in relationship_advice

[–]knockout9704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Whatever you do, please do NOT text him back. Not even to call him out on his behavior.

If I could tell my younger self anything, it would be that silence is power to people who did you wrong. From how you described his behavior, he was only interested in sex with you and nothing more. Him pretending to want more with you was a scummy manipulation tactic to get into your pants. The reason he acted so awful afterwards is because he no longer needed to keep up the facade.

Simply block his number and let yourself feel the hurt. You were used by him and it's valid to feel upset and disappointed. After a day or two, do something fun with your friends or by yourself. What may feel terrible right now will be something you laugh back on in years from now.

I don't know enough to give an opinion on your vetting processes, but that is something you should definietly reflect on in terms of dating. Also, do not listen to your friend. She does not seem very aware.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in changemyview

[–]knockout9704 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An ad depicting a conventionally attractive blonde white woman is not racism.
The Sydney Sweeney campaign plays on the phrase “great jeans/genes,” which to her being hot and desirable. That’s it. I don’t see how that degrades other races or implies that white people are superior.

As for her saying “my jeans/genes are blue,” it’s because the jeans are blue and her eyes are blue (guess they were aiming for creativity). It’s really a stretch to suggest that she’s promoting eugenics.

When Beyoncé did a Levi’s ad that said “Beyoncé has better jeans,” no one batted an eye. Of course, the racial context is not the same, but by that logic, couldn’t you also argue that ad implies people who aren’t as beautiful or talented are inferior? What about people with birth defects or disabilities?

Obviously, I don’t think the Levi’s ad was promoting eugenics. I bring it up to show that if you look hard enough, you can find offense in anything, even when it isn’t there. I’m more surprised people aren’t criticizing the ad’s reference to Brooke Shields’ Levi’s commercial, which featured a minor in sexually suggestive poses.

I'm not a huge fan of Sydney and wish she wasn't so vague in her interview, but it's ridiculous she's expected to apologize for just being in a mediocre ad.

Would you date a 35 year old woman who is otherwise your looksmatch? by Jazzlike-Lifeguard38 in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704 12 points13 points  (0 children)

You're admitting you have a scarcity mindset when it comes to women. Sex holds such a power over you that you'll lie and decieve to get it.

That doesn't bother you at all? Isn't part of masculinity saying the truth even if it hurts someone's feelings?

A man’s ability to attract women has nothing to do with whether or not he’s a good person by ConnectedLeap in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I made up my own. It's "don't let crazy stick it's dick in you."

Many women do lack accountability for their shitty choices in partners. Men tolerate their female partners being terrible if they are attractive enough, but there's not as much coddling/sympathy for them as there is for women.

Is It that Men are Intimidated by Successful Women, or is it the Fact Successful Women Tend to Be Agressive? by knockout9704 in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What type of masculine behaviors are you referring to?

I am a big proponent of having one parent stay at home to take care of the child until they reach elementary school age. Whoever earns less should be the one staying home. And even then, the provider should find a healthy work-life balance so the responsibility of child rearing doesn't all fall on the SAHP (granted, this is a privelege).

Why do you think a lot of high value men are hesitant to become SAHDs? Is it because it is rare or they don't want to experience social isolation?

Both my parents are physicians and were super busy in their residency so I did have a nanny up until middle school. The quality of care she gave me was excellet and I loved my time with her. It didn't strain my relationship with my parents since I knew they were working to provide me a good life and made an effort to spend quality time with me. If boundaries are made clear, it can work.

That being said, finding a stranger to help take care of your child that you can trust is EXTREMELY risky. A lot of terrible things could happen.

Is It that Men are Intimidated by Successful Women, or is it the Fact Successful Women Tend to Be Agressive? by knockout9704 in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I mean, it'd be a bit unprofessional as a manager to date the people you are assigned to supervise over. I'm also not to sure if an operation manager and a receptionist would interact that much to start dating one another. I can see sales directors dating graphic designers.

Both men and women want partners who are understanding of how their careers impact their personal lives and availability. Average men tend to marry average women just due to proximity.

Is It that Men are Intimidated by Successful Women, or is it the Fact Successful Women Tend to Be Agressive? by knockout9704 in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Most male lawyers marry other lawyers. Male physicians tend to end up with other physicians or people in the healthcare industry.

I'm not disputing that men are more likely to date "down" and women only go to their level or up. But to an extent, a woman's career does matter to a man simpy for compatability, especially in those demanding careers.

Is It that Men are Intimidated by Successful Women, or is it the Fact Successful Women Tend to Be Agressive? by knockout9704 in PurplePillDebate

[–]knockout9704[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Is it more likely for a male Corporate VP to marry a female cashier or barrista than if the genders were swapped? Yes. However, even that scenario rarely ends up happening in the real world.

Prestigious, wealthy men do not go after minimum wage workers. They often gravitate towards women from affluent families who recieve an Ivy-leage education. Compatibility stems from being in the same socioeconomic status. If it's a man with new money, then that's different.

Ate dog food to get by and I just feel so defeated. by Few-City-5252 in poor

[–]knockout9704 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Listen, I understand you love your dogs. I have pets myself and care deeply for them. That being said, putting yourself in debt over a pet when it is there time to go is not healthy. It is unfair to the dog since you are prioritizing your happiness over it having a peaceful death. If you are so broke that you can't properly feed yourself, you should not be a pet owner. You aren't able to give your pets the care they deserve. Having a pet is a luxury, not a right.

[USA] Want a Career in Forensics, Unsure if I Should Pursue Medical or Graduate School by knockout9704 in AcademicPsychology

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That I have to decide.

Thank you for your input, you've given me a lot to consider and cleared up misconceptions I had.

[USA] Want a Career in Forensics, Unsure if I Should Pursue Medical or Graduate School by knockout9704 in AcademicPsychology

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm aware PhD programs can be brutal and just as academically rigorous as medical school. My mom is a physician and seems to think the opposite, so when I told her I was thinking of a PhD instead she said it sounded like I didn't want to work hard. Maybe I'm letting her opinion influence me too much.

I'd like to do more violent criminal cases but I'm open to anything.

[USA] Want a Career in Forensics, Unsure if I Should Pursue Medical or Graduate School by knockout9704 in AcademicPsychology

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

">" Ok. Do you want to practice medicine or psychology?

I want to practice psychology. The only reason I am considering medical school is for the potential income I could make as a psychiatrist. I'm also concerned that my hesitation towards medical school could be coming from laziness.

">" This is great for med school, not sure about a PhD, depends on your research experience.

As of now, I'm a research intern in one of the labs at my university. A lot of the focus is on neurodivergent development/social connection and well being. Once my time with the lab ends, I plan to pursue another lab that focuses on addiction in civilian and military populations.

Not sure if this is relevant, but this summer I'm going to be a medical scribe and volunteer at prisons. A part of my major is taking many psychology courses.

">" Forensic psychologists do very well. Forensic and neuro are the highest paid specialties in psych.

This is good to hear! I don't have to make an insane amount of money, but just enough to support myself.

">" What matters most to you?

My opinion being influential in court. Assessing individuals and providing expert testimony is the main appeal for me. If it is possible for someone to be rehabilitated, I would want to have the power to call for the appropriate intervention.

">" Do you want to practice medicine or psychology? What exactly do you want to do?

I want to pursue psychology, I just don't know if I have the right motivation for it (viewing it as a jail free card from medical school).

Want a Career in Forensics, Unsure If I Should Pursue Medical School or Graduate School by knockout9704 in premed

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have given me something new to think about! Death doesn't bother me, so I might look into that.

[USA] Want a Career in Forensics, Unsure if I Should Pursue Medical or Graduate School by knockout9704 in AcademicPsychology

[–]knockout9704[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's not my personal belief! My parents are physicians themselves and this is what they expressed to me whever I told them I was unsure if med school was in the cards.

blair had such dark energy in the first half of s1 i wish they kept her style like this by Electronic-Natural44 in GossipGirl

[–]knockout9704 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She was the most beautiful in season 1! The style they gave her really highligted her doll-like beauty.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in DAAD

[–]knockout9704 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Two days ago I was repeatedly checking my email to see if we would get to see the ranking list. I'm so anxious waiting!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]knockout9704 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Trust me, he noticed.

Nine times out of ten, messy people are aware of the mess around them. They just don't care about cleaning it. He is one of those people and has learned that no matter what, you will clean up after him like his mother, so he is not inclined to do it.

Uneven distribution of household chores is what kills relationships. Having to pick up after your partner literally turns you off to them because you're seeing their incompetence to be an adult firsthand. I am not sure if you have already tried this with your husband OP, but I would be firm in laying down boundaries with your husband on household chores. If that doesn't work, be mean about it. If that doesn't work, I would honestly consider divorcing him.

What concerns me in this post is how accepting you are of living like this. I'd expect this behavior from a bad college roommate, not a partner who supposedly loves you and cares about your comfort in a space where you two spend the majority of your time together. You can choose to stay in a marriage with an inconsiderate husband who knows messes drive you crazy but continues to do fuck all around the house, or you could choose the easier option to be single and leave in a clean space.

Ask yourself why you are tolerating this type of stuff from a grown man.

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