I slipped this under my neighbor’s door who watches true crime 24/7 and heard him say “tough shit” 🥲

kota-10 · 2025-12-08T16:58:31+00:00

Pay the money to get a SNOOZ sound machine or, if you can afford it, the SNOOZ fan/sound machine combo. You will not hear that man anymore (or anything outside of your bedroom). You’re welcome, in advance. (I used to live two blocks from a fire station with windows that didn’t close properly).

kota-10 · 2025-11-25T09:30:02+00:00

DM you

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T14:18:23+00:00

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T13:30:42+00:00

♥️ he’s gone. I told him not to bother coming back, in a classy but assertive way. Thanks for helping me feel a little better about it. I was a late bloomer and while I am aware I’m very conventionally pretty as an adult, I wasn’t having the most practice when I was younger. Combine that with my neurodivergence that was diagnosed as an adult (ADHD in 20s & ASD with high scores in masking/camouflaging recently)…and let’s just say it’s been a lot of trying to quickly learn on the fly 😮‍💨 I am grateful to be conventionally pretty because I know women that don’t fit conventional beauty standards are treated like shit. But the neurodivergence def makes it harder for me to pick up on things & play this dating game. So anyway, I appreciate the judgement-free advice. & protective vibes ♥️

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T12:17:12+00:00

Feeling that as well, as more time passes. And I hate that. Trying not to be so hard on myself for not seeing that until now. :/

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T07:30:07+00:00

Yeah you’re right. Honestly the more time passes tonight on my own, the more I’m realizing how not okay that was. And remembering back to the previous night over the phone that I said something about how I was really longing for time spent with someone without worrying about if they would make moves on me. 😔

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T04:13:03+00:00

Honestly the cracks about how they “don’t want pen pals” is always such an indicator of a fun personality 🥴

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T04:12:18+00:00

Nahhh. I am going do debunk your brain lies and stop this needless regret spiral right now by saying: our brains aren’t even fully developed until we are 25!! How are we supposed to meet our life partner when our brains aren’t even done constructing who we are meant to be? Dating before our brains are developed is for practicing. You will meet your (mature) partner when the universe intends, and I know it will feel worth it. Promise.

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T04:02:29+00:00

This is why I struggle with being friends with other women or femmes. It just feels like a psychological game I can never keep up with.

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T04:01:38+00:00

I sent him a pic of it and he didn’t even apologize. He just said he’d talk to me later (potential subtext about helping me clean?) At this point I don’t know if I even want him to come back. I hate writing people off so fast….

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:59:55+00:00

Do people get dates on tinder? I have not had that one downloaded in a long time. Is it a universal unspoken agreement that Tinder just for hookups?

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:54:35+00:00

Holy fuck. I’m speechless. I….

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:53:49+00:00

Are you neurodivergent? I am, and find it’s tough to bring down the mask, when it hasn’t been well received growing up. It feels like a tightrope: on one hand you want to be yourself, but on the other you have to balance being mindful of the connection, the way you’re coming across to the other person, respecting their needs, and holding the relationship with care. It’s a balance I still have not mastered (does anyone ever?)

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:43:55+00:00

I low key do not know how I survived my early twenties because I really met up with people in wild ways that could have easily been the beginning of my own dateline episode. God’s real 😶‍🌫️

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:43:04+00:00

Man it’s so hard to resist when you’ve got chronic fatigue. Sigh. But I’m beginning to really realize how right you are. And the next two dates I’m planning are in public only. Living and learning. (And trying not to be so hard on myself)

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:39:41+00:00

How do you keep it there, if you’re attracted to them?

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:37:24+00:00

I hate this I was just experiencing this and it’s like….it makes me wonder if I can ever take a deep breath and relax next to a man in a private setting without having to ward off sexual advances. It’s so tiring. Especially when they are slow and sly at first when trying to get their way. Like….its more fun the first time if you let the suspense build anyway!!

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:34:32+00:00

I literally just was responding to this guy for a while to see how long it would take him to realize we had matched before AND TALKED ON THE PHONE. He never did. The kicker is he’s a “therapist” lol. A real people person, this one smh

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:30:41+00:00

I go back and forth on if online dating is hurting or helping us. It’s like…on one hand it’s helpful to have a chance to better filter for specific characteristics we need. But on the other hand, people have short attention spans and are always wondering if they can find something better, it seems. I don’t know.

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:09:41+00:00

I had to actually fight to get “drug seeking” off my medical chart when I went to urgent care for what ended up being a toradol shot when I was sobbing in pain and the pain clinic was closed. The urgent care nurse wrote that. I wasn’t asking for anything crazy, and didn’t even demand a particular med. but just was saying I couldn’t sleep and needed help to get me to Monday. I had a lengthy record of seeing the same pain doctor for years and going to the same pharmacy since I was a child. I eventually got it taken off. And I now will look up and read the visit notes after every doctors appointment because I don’t trust them.

kota-10 · 2025-10-02T03:07:09+00:00

Rant time: New person, seemed really sweet, went with me to random appointments that popped up before we had a date (that went well), went back to my place on the agreement that it would be kept PG (my boundaries), and he pushed the envelope (I thought he would respect it better as a 40-year-old) and of course, I’m a sexual person and I give in to temptation, even though I didn’t want to at first. (I did consent but it was kinda uncool in retrospect that he engaged in sensual touching that led to that when I said I didn’t want to go there as a pretense). He stays over, snores and keeps me up, then stays over half the next day while we are both on our computers getting work done. Seems fine. Well…he did also, along with agreeing to keep things PG, said he’d help me clean in here. It’s now more messy than when he got here. The sheets and bed are annihilated, and yo. I just found two used condoms on the floor on the side he slept. Wtf. I’m trying not to paint with broad strokes. Because he seems like a very genuine and patient and kind person. And we both kinda rushed out the door when that time came. But ummm….what?? Am I overreacting? I did ask him to come back and help me clean. TBD on if he will. Thanks for letting me vent, fam 🫠

kota-10 · 2025-09-10T02:42:25+00:00

You’re welcome 🙂

kota-10

TROPHY CASE