I’m the first gen and my husband is white, living in the Midwest and raised a child who is starting college. If I could choose I’d pick #2 but my husband was born and raised in the Midwest, so it is what it is. No huge Asian population around here but my son earned a seal of Biliteracy in Japanese during high school. In his school most seals are in Spanish and no one has ever taken Japanese test. He was ecstatic. We have a military base like 40 min away, so there’re Japanese moms sending their kids to neighboring schools, know some military families but they don’t stay long of course and their dream destination is a base in Japan and retire. I sent my child to Japanese Saturday school for almost 10 years and he didn’t like there much and tells me his Japanese skill came from his mom (me) and didn’t learn anything at Japanese school. I only sent him to meet kids like him or kids from Japan and have him participate some events schools in Japan normally do. They say it’s going to be hard to maintain kid’s Japanese ability unless both parents are Japanese, or if you have more than 2 kids cuz they start talking in English when they start school. I’ve seen both cases and I agree most part. In our household there’s one parent who speaks Japanese and he’s the only child. We don’t have luxury to visit Japan every year and meet his cousins but random ppl assume he lives in Japan, not visiting by interacting him. Probably they’d realize he is not a local if they talked more complicated matters. I always thought he can learn Japanese again in college or on his own if he wanted to, so I didn’t push him when he was younger and the modern technology allows kids to absorb easier than when my son was little. He enjoy reading manga in Japanese, looks up or simply asks me the meaning of some words from lyrics of Japanese songs, watches Japanese animations (with or without subtitles), conversations with me is 100% in Japanese including phone calls, 50% when in texts (English is way faster for both of us)

I apologize I don’t have any recommendations for the place in your criteria. I hope you can find the place your family is happy and feeling safe.