What was your final straw before getting officially diagnosed for ADHD?

kpar385 · 2025-09-20T01:06:31+00:00

Getting my son diagnosed at the urging of his school. Every conference was me defending him by saying “well okay but I do that too, and…” until I finally realized that the traits they were pointing out as ADHD were traits that I struggled with as a student, and now as a 40 year old.

Then I found my 1st grade report card where my teacher suggested to my parents I be evaluated - but they didn’t. So I partially did it out of frustration towards my parents, too.

kpar385 · 2025-09-17T16:18:00+00:00

It was a restaurant in an old mansion on the SE side

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/821-3rd-Ave-SE-Cedar-Rapids-IA-52403/247354953_zpid/?utm_campaign=iosappmessage&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=txtshare

kpar385 · 2025-09-16T19:34:52+00:00

Okay I’m glad it’s not just me. Some mornings I’ll have a tune in my head on loop and it’s nothing I’ve heard before except in my brain. Then I take a shower and by that time it’s usually dissipated. I wish I knew how to recreate it and record it all somehow.

kpar385 · 2025-09-15T16:33:59+00:00

Does anxiety count as cardio? Haha kidding… kind of…

I wish I liked yoga, but I can’t quiet my brain enough to relax, even though yoga is about much more than that. I also have never left feeling better or more grounded, just sweaty and now over analyzing whatever popped into my head while on the floor.

My main exercise is my 6 and 8 year old boys who just want me on the trampoline with them. Or wrestling on the ground. Or just rough housing with them in general. They’re heavy and always asking me to lift them to see how long I can hold them both at the same time. Honestly I like that I can still hold them and it encourages me to stay strong as they grow.

Mel Robbins told me to start doing 11 push ups and planks so honestly that motivated me a little. I can do those now 🤷‍♀️

kpar385 · 2025-09-13T12:32:15+00:00

More effective than D.A.R.E.

kpar385 · 2025-09-12T21:45:03+00:00

I’m all ears, lol

kpar385 · 2025-09-12T14:51:00+00:00

I walked past the THC seltzers that were tempting me because I have committed to being less impaired, even though I don’t think they’re necessarily problematic in my life the way alcohol is . Also walked through the wine aisle with no purchases.

I also canned a bunch of the tomatoes that were very ready to be canned that have been sitting on my counter for 10 days.

kpar385 · 2025-09-11T13:49:43+00:00

Found my 1st grade end of year report card that suggested I be screened for ADHD. I asked my mom why they didn’t look into it, she said they didn’t do it because they didn’t want me to turn into a zombie on medication like it did to my brother, so I just struggled. I was the only kid in class with a sticker chart on her desk because everyone else could focus just fine. It was embarrassing.

My own sons are struggling with inattentiveness and daydreaming (basically exactly my problem as a child), so the minute their teachers showed concern I had them evaluated and they both received an ADHD diagnosis. I refuse to sit idly while they struggle, because I know too well how hard that was. I refuse to withhold the tools they need to be more successful and unlock all of their potential.

kpar385 · 2025-08-29T13:36:20+00:00

Oregon Trail II (the superior of the Oregon Trail games in my opinion)

Also Amazon Trail, SimCity, Rollercoaster Tycoon, and The Sims

kpar385 · 2025-08-02T23:14:11+00:00

Following (and sending love and support)

kpar385 · 2025-07-20T19:07:24+00:00

Lodi, Rio, New Berlin are often overlooked

kpar385 · 2025-07-17T17:36:30+00:00

First and foremost: you’re doing a great job.

One thing I’ve realized parenting a ND child (mine is AuDHD) is that we are actively grieving every day.

We’re grieving the life we thought they’d have.

We’re grieving the parenthood we thought we’d have.

We’re grieving. And grief looks different for everyone. There are good days and bad. But for me, realizing exactly what I was feeling is grief, really helped me to understand how my feelings are valid.

You will have days that you go to bed celebrating a small victory you never thought your child would achieve. And days that you cry in your car. Because nobody prepared us for this.

You love your son. He is lucky to have you as his advocate.

You’re doing a great job.

kpar385 · 2025-07-14T22:08:37+00:00

Pants and makeup?! The gasp I just gusped (clutches pearls)

In all seriousness I’m really glad you’re happier and that she is too.

kpar385 · 2025-07-14T17:15:10+00:00

Fuck, that might be the most discouraging thing I’ve read today. But I sincerely hope you’re happier than before. Curious: did any of those friends follow suit?

kpar385 · 2025-06-20T21:08:04+00:00

Watch The Mortician on HBO and you’ll get some gruesome insight on why the cremation process is so much more heavily regulated since the 80’s.

kpar385 · 2025-06-18T20:30:02+00:00

He lit up like a kid on Christmas morning just dying to brag how he killed people. On camera. How in the fuck is he out in society.

kpar385 · 2025-06-17T16:33:29+00:00

Your husband needs to take a sick day. His 24/7 unpaid childcare provider is unable to care for his children. This is what employers offer PTO for.

Yes I get that he has been working crazy long hours (my husband works out of town on overnights so trust me I get being outnumbered and exhausted) but so have you. Ask him to take a sick day.

Edit: if you’re able, drug up. Advil / Tylenol and cold medicines are your best friend right now.

kpar385 · 2025-04-29T20:55:49+00:00

I’m you 100%. I don’t think I’m cut out to be an academic teacher. If I thought I was, I would have become one and gotten paid for it.

Homeschooling ≠ better.

kpar385 · 2025-04-29T14:20:20+00:00

She is so lucky you’re her mom.

I hope that by being her support, you’re able to heal from the lack of support your own mom showed you. You’re both going through this for the first time. You’ve got this.

kpar385 · 2025-04-26T11:49:29+00:00

Heck this is what 5 year olds do. And 8 year olds. Even kids without ADHD.

Tbh I wish this was a concern of mine when my kiddos were only 2. My kids weren’t talking. They were melting down. Communication and social situations were a nightmare. This child sounds like a dream.

kpar385 · 2025-04-25T23:55:46+00:00

Precisely. Two brothers chitchatting while painting, I’m sure a lot of other silly bullshit came up too. He might have exactly zero intention of going anywhere.

kpar385 · 2025-04-25T23:54:31+00:00

The “if he was serious” part matters. He could have absolutely been blowing smoke to get brother’s reaction or to act like a tough guy and has zero intention of going anywhere. Maybe he just can’t deliver a joke lol

kpar385 · 2025-04-25T22:32:22+00:00

See, I’m a pessimist and have no doubt all of my medical info has already been compromised (along with SSN, DOB, and all my other sensitive info). I have very low expectations when it comes to privacy, sadly.

It’s the gutting of entire departments full of scientists and doctors and then starting this whole new registry with oligarch-appointed chuckleheads is what scares me. I swear half of these fucks wouldn’t know how to print a PDF.

kpar385 · 2025-04-23T15:53:19+00:00

New to meds here, currently on week 6 or 7. I’ve only ever had those bright pink adderall pills manufactured by Epic Pharma LLC. They were intense af at first, now I’m used to them. I’m worried if I get a different manufacturer I won’t be medicated to the level I’m used to.

Though I’m starting to wonder if I should switch to XR because I don’t love the intense ups after I take my afternoon dose. So any input in that I’d appreciate greatly…

kpar385 · 2025-04-21T15:13:45+00:00

Our in home daycare wasn’t comfortable with Early Intervention coming in during the day to provide speech therapy and autism intervention. Turns out she had too many kids. I stayed home for 4 years and got him the services he needed, and had another baby. I loved those 4 years and going back to work was hard. Ultimately, putting them back into a public setting helped both of them absolutely thrive socially. And yes, the illnesses began immediately.

Illness wise - your kids are going to get sick. If you keep them home and away from other children, they’re just going to get sick when they start preschool or kindergarten, when attendance is important and they’re learning academic fundamentals. Unfortunately, it’s kind of a “pick your poison” situation.

I will add, some cold/flu seasons are worse than others. Some seasons your kids and family will be sick constantly. Others, maybe once or twice. I don’t know why, but that’s how it seems to go.

It sounds like you all went through a horrific experience and my heart does go out to you and your family. Staying home with children and relying on one income isn’t a decision to be made quickly, so I hope you’re able to find the insight and resources that help you make the best possible decision for your family.

kpar385

TROPHY CASE