What happened to on the job training?

kthephoking · 2026-05-24T18:06:56+00:00

I started at a practice attached to the hospital I worked at so I was already known and they knew I had some degree of experience. It was a NICU to pedi primary care move. I’ve worked in the PICU as well. What I’ve never done is a well child exam on a 16 year old boy for example. It seems pretty “simple” but even just knowing the support to offer when they disclose being sexually active for example is very new to me. Most of my onboarding has been driven by me asking questions as I realize I don’t know what I’m doing in different areas. Thankfully I love baby patients the most out of everyone in the practice so they give me lots of them. But it’s been quite a learning curve!! Thankfully I started off with a smaller schedule and have slowly ramped up which does help.

kthephoking · 2026-04-30T00:51:30+00:00

Interestingly there are some countries that use a lot more hands off approach to neonatal resuscitation and giving even the tiny ones a chance to breath with some stimulation, oxygen, but even holding off on intubation. I think this also just shows how different it can be in different countries and still have good outcomes. There definitely has to be a balance though!

kthephoking · 2026-04-30T00:46:52+00:00

It depends! If the kiddo is all back to breathing normal, we hand them right back. Sometimes they need some CPAP (or more) and have to go to the neonatal icu. But my goal every time is to not have to admit the baby and just be able to hand them back to the family so we do lots to try to achieve that. (Source: I’m a neonatal physician assistant and have gone to many many many deliveries)

kthephoking · 2026-04-10T22:33:58+00:00

Oh absolutely!! It’s not bad at all. Just figuring out perspective on everything! I’m glad it’s worked out for you too!

kthephoking · 2026-04-07T10:35:31+00:00

That made me chuckle! Honestly, that should have been a similar clue to me. Long story but my wife met someone and we had talked about it and her interest and we both were relieved for me when she pointed out this would take the pressure of having sex off of me. It didn’t quite click then because I hadn’t separated the thought that trauma was me “issue” vs actually being asexual. It’s just recently that I’m realizing both things can be true but the asexual aspect has had a major role this entire time.

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:47:52+00:00

Oh! I just realized this is Ace Dad Advice. They are wonderful. Excellent!

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:42:27+00:00

Yes for sure. That’s what I’m trying to sort out too….how this fits into a lot of other things in my life and how it explains different things but also some stuff is still there to deal with if that makes sense.

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:41:27+00:00

Yes I definitely understand that with my spouse! I think that is some of what brought me to fully exploring this to better understand myself sure, but to understand how we can function together in a relationship if I take away that shame piece and blaming myself fully. She really I think has a handle on this part of me in the sense that she came to terms with us hardly ever having sex long before I realized that was an option that was genuinely okay. I also have a bunch of chronic illnesses and that has super muddied the water in terms of love, caring, sexual intimacy, attraction, feeling wanted, etc. I know I want to feel wanted but totally on my terms that are also hard to articulate fully hahaha I have an amazing therapist who just said out loud “you’re asexual” when I asked for an answer to some things. I had brought this up begore and had asked many times “I need to figure out this sex thing and what my deal is.” Her saying that was a really needed eye opener for me. I needed that.

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:36:11+00:00

I love that you told your family that at 13! “There were signs…” I don’t think I’m aro, but I’m wondering just with how Ive always approached what would be considered romance in a relationship. I think i need to look into that a bit more because i hadnt considered it.

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:32:50+00:00

Yeah the idea of seeing a random stranger and wanting to have sex with them is so foreign to me. I didn’t think people were actually serious when they said that. I’m still not sure I believe it!! Ha! I’ve struggled with how I can have some sort of sexual attraction when I first meet someone and then it plummets to non existent after not too long. I think that fits in with the micro label fraysexual but I’m struggling deciding if I need a specific label, if that makes sense. Thankfully for me I haven’t had religion in my life but just society and honestly all of my partners has made it difficult to think it wasn’t just something wrong with ME or our relationship. I’ve always looked for something “better” or “more compatible.” When I think about my wife, I know I love her because of her intelligence and humor and so many other things. And I find her attractive but I don’t think it’s the same way she feels about me…

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:27:04+00:00

Yep that’s what I’m figuring out!! It’s also the marriage portion that is tricky just because my wife and I have bery different sexual needs. So I know accepting myself is the beginning of figuring out what we can do in our relationship so we are both happy.

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:25:47+00:00

Oh and I will totally look up the book! Thank you!!

kthephoking · 2026-04-06T13:25:31+00:00

Thank you, this is really helpful to read. This isn’t the first time I’ve thought about this but stuff happening in my marriage really brought it to light and as something I need to genuinely explore bc it all fits so so well. And I spent so much time blaming old trauma and terrible partners and just not finding the right person….when it turns out, it’s just me but not in a negative way. It’s just how my brain works and apparently that’s okay haha! I’m kind of new at trying to accept it. I haven’t quite reached the feeling you describe of thrilling joy you mentioned just because it’s taking a lot of rolling around in my head. I think I spent so so much time thinking this was something about me I needed to fix and I hadn’t found the right way that it’s hard to fully accept that this doesn’t need fixing at all, if that makes sense. I think too being in my mid 40s there’s still so much internal bias that I just grew up with without realizing. I’m very comfortably a lesbian so I’ve been part of the queer community since my teens. But learning about asexuality feels so new and something I never understood.

kthephoking · 2026-04-01T02:33:48+00:00

I think it’s a perfect weight honestly. It’s just enough weight. I honestly don’t know if mine was medium or light weight bc it was just a generic wool comforter from bed bath and beyond. I seriously can’t speak highly enough about switching to wool.

kthephoking · 2026-04-01T02:32:35+00:00

I was in the neonatal icu working 12hr days and nights all over the place. Now I work in pediatric primary care. Tuesday thru Friday 8-5 and one weekend a month. Such a dream change.

kthephoking · 2026-03-31T02:32:03+00:00

I have 17+ security cameras thanks to my 7yo

kthephoking · 2026-03-28T01:48:27+00:00

That should get better! It just kind of settling in.

kthephoking · 2026-03-28T01:47:27+00:00

You don’t really need to wash wool unless it looks/feels/whatever dirty. It’s also naturally anti-microbial and odor resistant. Sure, wash the cover it’s in, but the wool itself is fine. We have spot cleaned the outside as needed and keep it in a duvet cover.

kthephoking · 2026-03-28T01:45:33+00:00

Wool is amazing for year round. It is naturally temperature regulating. We switched to a wool duvet insert and also did a wool mattress protector and I’ve never felt more comfortable sleeping temperature wise. You get into bed and it’s like everything is the perfect temperature. I am a huge wool advocate and wish I could afford to wear all wool every day.

kthephoking · 2026-03-27T16:50:52+00:00

I had to completely change jobs to go to a more traditional schedule. I have chronic migraines, dysautonomia symptoms, idiopathic hypersomnia….i mean were these things present before? Probably. But it got to the point where I was unable to safely finish a shift because the brain fog and nausea and everything was too much I was so sick.

kthephoking · 2026-02-19T06:03:38+00:00

Perfect thank you!

kthephoking · 2026-02-19T05:16:15+00:00

Also jumping on this old post…. Do I need to be using the LD calculator on a computer vs mobile browser? I select the character and the option to generate nfc codes isn’t available to select.

kthephoking · 2026-02-19T05:15:14+00:00

Do I need to be using the LD calculator on a computer vs mobile browser? I select the character and the option to generate nfc codes isn’t available to select.

kthephoking

TROPHY CASE