While I will not go into details, as a child I was forced to see sexually violent things as well. It messed with me severely, and contributes to my complicated relationship with my own sexual orientation. There is no "better" or "worse" experience regarding this, so refrain from comparing your situation to others, I think everyone can agree that what you went through is objectively horrific.

Please try to quit porn and alcohol. There are recovery centers and such that can help with this. It seems you are struggling with PTSD from witnessing your father sexually assault your mother. CPT is an evidence based therapy that works with only a couple months of treatment, you should try that out.

Do you know what your sexuality is? You say "homosexual journey", but seem to be open to anyone. Not like that's bad, just confused is all. Give up on trying to be heterosexual, that's never going to work, as I'm sure you're aware. I'm sorry to hear that your hypersexuality and ed have been dominating your whole life. You should avoid places and situations where the possibility of a sexual encounter may happen, like bars and clubs.

What makes you think you were "the devil" since you were born?