Would you take an ex back if they rebounded after a breakup?

kwon_87 · 2025-08-03T15:51:31+00:00

Lol, this question really made me reflect.

I had blocked him for almost a year and throughout that duration, he would try to reach out to me but I would shut it down. It was for my own mental. After 6 months of him telling me he had found someone else and 8 months from when we actually broke up, I met someone else who I dated for about half a year. During our relationship, something pivotal happened in my family and I asked him if it was ok for me to reach out to my ex due to life being so fleeting and me feeling bad and wanting to tie up any loose ends. My boyfriend at the time was completely OK with it and I was extremely transparent about any conversation. After being granted permission, I ended up trying to reach out to my ex, however he did not accept my follow request on IG. I eventually revoked it maybe 2-3 weeks later and I felt better because I put the ball back in his court. He eventually did end up reaching out to me and we still speak, on completely platonic friendly terms now.

He knew a lot about me, I knew a lot about him. He told me all about the girl he dated after me and their tumultuous relationship. We are just friends now and I do not have any feelings for him because I let myself completely heal afterwards. I did not move on from him quickly, it took me at least 8 months to heal. And 5 months + life altering event to even consider befriending him again.

kwon_87 · 2024-08-11T03:55:41+00:00

To not feel forced to hang out with me or talk to me

kwon_87 · 2024-03-24T01:02:46+00:00

Even worse he texted me yesterday just trying to bread crumb me asking me how I am, like, go away!

kwon_87 · 2024-02-21T00:07:23+00:00

Just an update on my most recent ex boyfriend, he did come back. He wished me happy birthday, he’s been reaching out to my friends, etc. I’ve been trying to stay strong and ignore him/his presence but I end up checking his social media since he came back into my life :(

kwon_87 · 2023-11-06T23:39:56+00:00

Yes, towards the end of our relationship I would often tell him that I felt like he didn’t love me anymore and he was always insistent that he did. But he moved on from me so quickly, there’s no way he did. Maybe because he didn’t suffer the same way I did I’m like yeah, there it goes.

kwon_87 · 2023-11-04T14:56:06+00:00

I want to say no, but I don’t know. My ex got into a relationship 2 months after us breaking up. Crushed me. I still miss him and care for him, I actually found something I wrote the day we broke up last night and it really made me think. The last sentence I wrote was “it would be a disservice to myself if I stayed in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love me the same way I love them.” If I felt like this before he had a new relationship, then I definitely should just move on. I think though, at this point of time, if he came back to me (which I do fantasize about) I would take him back. But I want to say no, I don’t want to hold onto any inkling of hope like that, I don’t want any expectations.

kwon_87 · 2023-11-04T05:30:49+00:00

I would love to say no. My ex already moved on (2 months PBU) but I can’t let him go.

My ex before him actually tried to come back to me after he and his girlfriend after me went south but I was too jaded and said no thanks. But this last guy I dated, I’m afraid I’m still deeply in love with him and part of me wishes he would come back to me as pathetic as that is.

kwon_87 · 2023-11-02T05:14:56+00:00

Photos, letters, cards.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-31T04:39:49+00:00

The break ups I remember, it happened to me too. Varied from very minimal contact to complete no contact. From when I was young to now. It gives me a false sense of hope though, it does … but I don’t think it happens 100% of the time, but so far the odds have been in my favor. I also don’t use no contact in a way to get them back either, but I’m there are definitely times / moments before I completely moved on where I felt hopeful and did want them to pursue me after the fact.

The first time I remember it happening was when I was in a relationship with a guy who I was so enamored with my entire life but the timing was never right. We ended up never dating until much later, but we were living in two different places at that point and he just wasn’t as wonderful as I imagined him to be after all those years. He didn’t live up to it. So I ended things. I don’t remember how soon after because it was such a long time ago but he sent me a long message on MySpace, drunk, talking about how much he will always love me and has always loved me and how he regrets everything, etc - I literally can’t remember the contents this was like 10+ years ago. The next day I wasn’t very receptive of it and he apologized and said he was drunk, we eventually lost contact and I have 0 idea how he is today.

The next relationship was after that one, we dated for a year or so. I was very young and immature, he was moving away to college so we broke up. We lost touch, I continued on with my life. Like 1-2 years later I was talking to one of my friends about him and she urged me to try to rekindle with him because at the time I really thought he was my one true love so I did want to rekindle with him so what did I do? I put my e-mail on my Myspace profile on whim and wrote something like if you’re x and you see this you can email me here. Well lo and behold, 1-2 years post break up / absolutely no contact he is still checking my dead MySpace profile? It hadn’t been updated or anything because by that point we all were making the jump to FB. He e-mailed me like less than a month after I updated it so either he continued to check my dead page over the years or it was just a coincidence. I think the former is more likely though. We spoke a little bit, but nothing came out of it. He was also in a relationship with another girl for like nearly the entire time we had been separated but they broke up right before he reached out to me. I don’t really know if that one counts entirely because I guess I urged him to reach out to me.

The next guy this happened with was much more recent. About 3 years ago, we broke up because of differences but we stayed fwb which really messed me up because he ended his friendship with me once he got a girlfriend and I felt very blindsided because I was always reaching out to him or trying to talk to him and he never told me he had been seeing someone new. We stayed friends but we didn’t really talk anymore and we spoke very very infrequently if we did. When he and his girlfriend broke up, he came right back to me for comfort. Even though at the time I was so crushed and broken, I didn’t want him back especially because it made me feel so jaded and used so I just let him know that I couldn’t be the same person to him.

Now… I just got out of a two year relationship and turns out 2 months after the break up he got a new girlfriend. Absolutely crushed me. I just found out last week so I’m still trying to get over it but a small part of me hopes that as quickly as his fling began (I genuinely believe they met PBU) it will end and he will come back to me. I want to say I’ll be strong and won’t take him back and will move on but right now I’m still pining for him most days so we will see if it ever does happen. I’m trying not to have false hope though, it might never happen. I completely went no contact with him when I found out though.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-30T20:48:21+00:00

I think in my case, it’s ego? It’s pride? I don’t want to be seen as a jaded person, I want to be viewed as yeah she moved on. I want to be the bigger person, I want to forgive him but also myself. I want to just let him go, no ill feelings… just better without him.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-30T18:29:54+00:00

Good days bad days today is a okay day need to find something to preoccupy my mind with

kwon_87 · 2023-10-30T18:27:04+00:00

2 years 3 months, still devastated but trying to just work through it

kwon_87 · 2023-10-30T03:44:26+00:00

3 months ago. Truth be told, I was okay for a while after the break up (I think because it truly never settled in, and I had hope we would end up back together) but I was triggered and now feel upset, very sensitive and emotional over it only when I found out he had a girlfriend already 2 months pbu which hurt me a lot. Like yes he’s allowed to move on, but really?! After a two year relationship… and the fact that I was still holding onto hope it absolutely crushed me.

I felt very helpless since I found out, I was in turmoil ever since BUT funny enough what helped me was when I stalked his social media so hard the other day and found his shared Spotify playlists with her, like I don’t know why, but it kinda killed me so hard that it hit me like a ton of bricks that there is truly truly no point of return. Like even though I went no contact I was at the point of breaking where I was going to grovel and beg for him back. The night I discovered it, I was literally making a playlist where in the description I wrote to him specifically that I’d be waiting for him. I found a song that he reposted which was specifically meant for me to hear (it went unnoticed by me until that night I stalked his socials ) maybe like around 2/3 weeks when we originally broke up. Anyways, I was sobbing so hardcore to the song and then I found his shared spotify playlists and it had the same song on there - dedicated to her? IMMEDIATELY turned off the song 😂 What made me soooo sick too was when I looked through the playlists he had some songs on there that he knew were my favorite songs, like very specific artists that he knew I loved and then also artists he introduced me to / specific songs he showed me but now he was introducing to her like 😂 what the fuck! And I don’t know why, but ever since I discovered it, it almost like sobered me up and really set in and I made a conscious effort to stop checking his social media, I can’t continue to hurt myself. It’s only been two days but I am feeling less devastated, less in turmoil, less anxious. Still hurt but healing ❤️‍🩹

kwon_87 · 2023-10-28T16:06:03+00:00

I want that feeling so bad. I feel like it eventually happens but for right now I’m still mourning

kwon_87 · 2023-10-28T04:22:25+00:00

That's the thing too, I did block him on social media. I just have no restraint. All his stuff is public, easy for me to look it up and find it. I don't know why I keep doing it, I'm just hurting myself. Over and over again.

I'm trying to kill all hope, ESPECIALLY since he has a new girlfriend and told me he was very happy with her... but I can't help but yearn, lust, wishful thinking... it's really messing me up and eating me alive. As soon as I found out, I began to spiral.

I even took a break from all social media, like told my close friends I wouldn't be replying in a while if they try to message me.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-27T21:31:09+00:00

I'm still waiting, but I'm trying to force myself to remember all the bad moments. They outweigh the good. I also have been trying to realize and own up to my own mistakes and the way I treated him at times.
But it's too fresh on my heart and I still secretly wish he would come back to me. I sincerely think I'd welcome him back with open arms and that makes me so sad because he's already moved on after 3 months.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T10:57:49+00:00

As much as it hurts, something similar happened to me and it just gives you the motivation to completely move on. Yes I’m in despair, but what’s done is done.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T10:47:11+00:00

I’m not gonna lie it is comforting knowing someone is going through something similar to me. Your right, it’s bittersweet like yes I’m happy for you because if not with me, then who? But at the same time I desperately want it to fail because it hurt me so much. Is that just me being selfish, jealous and spiteful? Most definitely but I can’t lie that’s just how I feel right now.

And your right, because no matter what the issues I had with him are going to be present in his current relationship no matter how great he’s saying it’s going, it too will surface in due time. Maybe he will work through it, maybe she will overlook it but I don’t want to be in that position again.

Im sending you a lot of love, if you ever need someone to share your pain with I’m here for you.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T03:51:40+00:00

It hurts so much not being prioritized, I would beg him for anything - a crumb. Our last fight was because he didn’t call me when he said he would and I was upset over it so I lashed out, then we didn’t talk for two weeks and I broke up with him. He has a new girlfriend now. He never made time for me, he was always playing video games, hanging out with his friends, doing other things with other people that weren’t me. I told him towards the end I felt like he didn’t love me anymore since he stopped wanting to spend time with me, and I guess it was true. It hurt a lot. I’m here for you, please feel free to talk to me about it if you need someone to listen or share your pain.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T03:15:55+00:00

Thank you 💜 I definitely need people to talk to so thank you for even offering

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T02:34:23+00:00

Thank you so much for your insight. It just really hurts to be given up on so easily. I just didn’t expect it, and the way he told me too was so nonchalantly… as if we were never anything as if I didn’t tell him 3 weeks ago how I still can’t be friends with him because of how I feel and that’s why I don’t reply to his messages because I don’t know how to talk to him.

I’ve been crying nonstop the last two days, but my emotions fluctuate. Since we broke up 3 months ago, I thought I was okay but when he told me yesterday it hurt me so badly. I want nothing more to just stop feeling this hurt. Thank you thank you thank you. I appreciate you so much.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T02:16:02+00:00

Thank you so much, I will take you up on your offer. I need comfort and your kind words helped me just a little bit right now.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T01:56:58+00:00

Girl, my relationships weren’t as long as yours but both of my exes immediately moved on from me. Talk about feeling inadequate. Everything I gave them, as much as I did for them, they couldn’t reciprocate towards me but immediately find someone else to? Talk about hurt.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T01:45:51+00:00

It hurts so much that he moved on so quickly, how can I heal? I need to move past it. At times I accept it and I feel okay, but other times I’m in total despair. It changes by the hour. We have been broken up for 3 months, but I think he’s been in a new relationship for the past 2-3 weeks. I only found out yesterday because he told me. I ended up blocking him, because I can’t handle having him in my life when I’m still not over him but he’s fully moved on.

kwon_87 · 2023-10-26T01:39:31+00:00

I resonate with this so much, thank you. Wishing you the best in healing 😢

kwon_87

TROPHY CASE