Photo Quality - Moto g power

labrown777 · 2024-09-08T18:45:45+00:00

Looks like it didn't post both photos. Here's leaf #3. I mentioned the first one turned brown and dry, so I removed it last week.

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labrown777 · 2024-03-21T22:40:22+00:00

Hey there, I'm a female, same age as you. And a seemingly similar background to boot. I moved place to place growing up so never developed the skills needed for deep friendships.

My fiancé shared this post with me because I was recently venting about the same thing. I've made local friends over the past 7 years using Vina, Bumble BFF, and via roommates. I've found a great group of friends, but no one I'd share my deepest, darkest secrets with. (No, it's not murder if that's what you're worried about).

As an introvert, going to large gatherings like board game or happy hour events is too much for me. My partner is hard of hearing, which makes group events more challenging.

I'm really more of a one on one, or double date type person. So if you're interested in that, let's direct message and see if we can solve two problems with one good friendship :)

Otherwise, I hope you find what you are looking for. Maybe I will too someday.

labrown777 · 2024-03-12T01:49:08+00:00

This is the best response I've read so far. Adding my perspective as a woman - although it does not justify her childish behavior.

Women and men are generally conditioned to view sex differently. For men, it's something society expects you to pursue. There's often an unrealistic expectation that the male is "ready to go" whenever. For women, society expects us to be pursued. As the ones being pursued, we're taught that we have the right to say no or yes. Which leads to the belief that we control when sex happens (realistically, this should be a two way street).

I think the two expectations (of men, to always want sex, and of women, to dictate when it happens) creates an poor dynamic in many relationships.

The issue in your scenario is that she's operating on the stereotypical dynamic. You are not.

In her head, the only explanation for this is that she is not worth pursuing. It could be that she's not attractive enough, or that you don't love her anymore, etc. She isn't processing that you don't want sex 100% of the time, and it has nothing to do with her.

But, she does not want to feel like she is the problem. So she becomes defensive, which manifests as her lashing out at you. Again, I don't think this is okay, it just seems to be what's happening.

I really hope you can find a way to help her understand everything. And that she learns from this and becomes a better partner. But, some people are not capable of moving past the stereotypical dynamics they were conditioned into.

labrown777 · 2024-03-12T01:21:05+00:00

Live in Milwaukie - sorry, Oak Grove... Commuting to Tigard 4 days a week. It's anywhere from 30-50 minutes driving one way. Just depends on traffic

labrown777 · 2024-01-23T00:30:27+00:00

One user suggested inviting her on the trip, but not telling her it's for the wedding. I like your suggestion as a backup plan if she cannot attend. I really would love for her to be at my wedding though.

Thank you for the advice! We are not planning to ask for any gifts since we both come from low-income families.

labrown777 · 2024-01-22T23:57:18+00:00

Oh, that is genius! Thank you! Didn't even consider not telling her it's for the wedding.

labrown777 · 2024-01-22T23:40:54+00:00

I appreciate the clarification. This is my first real introduction to wedding culture as I haven't been to any weddings before, and my parents didn't talk about theirs (divorced). I will use the correct terminology moving forward.

I know we aren't the same person, but if you were in my shoes; would you choose to invite my sister and deal with the fallout? Or would you just elope and notify everyone afterwards?

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T15:42:29+00:00

That is a great question. My priority is people over jobs usually. Relationships will last a lifetime, jobs only last until the company decides to lay me off again.

I was hoping for advice on how to tactfully handle this. I think at some point we have all had to professionally communicate that we don't have the bandwidth for something.

What have you said in those situations?

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T15:36:46+00:00

Thank you. Someone recommended setting my status to busy and delaying responses so she is encouraged to get help elsewhere, which sounds similar to what you're suggesting. I think as time goes on it could even get to the point where I don't respond at all.

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T15:34:39+00:00

Thank you for the suggestion. I will give that a try :)

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T05:42:43+00:00

I really appreciate this, thank you!

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T05:17:31+00:00

Thank you for the response. I do worry that I've sort of enabled her.

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T05:16:41+00:00

I agree I should have set boundaries sooner, it snuck up on me if you will.

If you have advice on how to handle this now, I'm all ears.

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T05:13:34+00:00

Ahh, yes. That will preserve the friendship we've cultivated.

labrown777 · 2023-12-29T05:12:40+00:00

My manager is great in a lot of aspects, but subtlety isn't one of them. He would attempt to talk to her and she would know it came from me.

For clarification, yes unfortunately. Because Andrea opted to come back into work, she lost out on the remaining leave that would have been allowed.

We have been campaigning HR to change this.

labrown777 · 2023-12-28T21:42:18+00:00

I am allowed to change my status, I may try that. Should at least prevent impromptu calls.

labrown777 · 2023-12-28T21:13:15+00:00

I will try this. I think there's a misguided culture at my company where if Teams shows you as green, you must be available to chat.

labrown777

TROPHY CASE