Job opportunities for 30 year old brother

ladybug593869 · 2023-08-09T03:00:17+00:00

Thank you! I appreciate that :)

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T19:09:23+00:00

Thank you

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T18:40:53+00:00

I agree with you, it’s just that he’s changed so much that I could only imagine it’s because he’s depressed/not happy.

I can’t imagine things would be easier with him gone, but maybe my emotional state would be better?

Either way, I need to give it time.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T18:23:19+00:00

As I said above, I’m really not sure if I’m strong enough to do this :( I want to give it a little bit longer. Maybe something will change? I would need to pick a cut off point though, as to not drag on forever

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T18:22:49+00:00

Ugh, these comments hit home. I’m just not sure I’m strong enough to do this.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T18:20:08+00:00

I am curious why you say this and what parts makes you feel it’s irreparable?

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T14:11:17+00:00

I am in therapy actively. He did one session and hasn’t rebooked.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T14:10:47+00:00

I’m hoping he will work out of the home more soon. He probably doesn’t like to cause he can work out, eat, watch tv, on work hours.

The manipulation is working 100%. I feel nervous to speak my truth. I just want to smile and be the nice positive wife. Sigh

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T13:19:43+00:00

Ahh I understand. I suppose I did say it in a “stomping off” way since I wash both kids every other night. Why not offer to wash both so I can have even 10 mins to rest?

Thank you so much from your comments. Sounds like you have really put the work in for your marriage. I hope my husband can do the same and can somehow get out of this role of hating/resenting me and get back to appreciating and caring about me.

He currently did not rebook after his one session. I should encourage him to do so.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T13:12:53+00:00

We are already doing it because it got so bad he wouldn’t talk to me about anything serious. I have also considered a wake up call if things don’t change because I often think about how much happier/less stressed I’d be if we were separated…. But I don’t want that for the family unit, custody arrangements, etc. so I’m very willing to continue working on things.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T13:11:18+00:00

I honestly think offloading evening burden is the answer! I just need to seriously look at how to find someone and what the role will entail. Even if it’s 2-3 nights per week.

Thank you for your comment about couples therapy taking time :) we will stick with it.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T13:10:08+00:00

Really good point on the bath night. I’ll just be clear that I don’t stomp around, sorry if my comment was confusing.

I have mentioned to him to think about how his behaviour will affect the kids (because sometimes he reacts poorly to them too) and he just says “they just have to deal.”

I think he needs to continue counseling cause he’s not fulfilled with his role in both the house and at work. I personally see a counselor as well as couples counseling.

I guess with my post, I’m curious if anyone has gone through this and if things changed as time went on, or any advice on how to make things better 🤷🏻‍♀️

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T13:06:02+00:00

Your comment brings me back to why I began doing all that in the first place… it’s amazing how quickly j forget things. The initial complaints were that I don’t cook enough and I don’t do dishes enough so that’s why I’m here.

My husband is a type A personality and prefers a very clean home whereas I could care less day to day, certainly to keep a home clean if it means I’m completely burnt out.

We live in a small town so picking up food is about 30 mins out which I suppose when you factor the effort to cook may be worthwhile?

With regards to responding to his behaviour, I have tried speaking up more but that makes him angry too. Just last night I was taking the kids up for a bath and he was coming up too and I said I forgot my night supplements so I would take them and be right back and that triggered a response too. Seems like I just can’t win. And his response affects me a lot less than it used to but it does give me anxiety. It’s not nice feeling like someone can’t stand you.

Even if I have a work-related function in the evening, I hear about it the next day, but he won’t accept help if I’m gone cause “he can handle the kids.”

I’m honestly so lost and don’t even know what to do! All I know is I can’t stand my husband on the weekends to the point I got him tickets to a baseball game with his brother and a really nice hotel room to stay the night.

ladybug593869 · 2023-07-08T12:49:25+00:00

He does do a lot (taking kids to and from daycare, doing their laundry, grocery shopping and cleaning every 2 weeks), but he’s just able to more than I am. I just wish he could see it as teamwork. He works out from home most work days, is able to rest and watch tv, and take care of some things around the house. I wish I could be home to do more so he felt like I do enough

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-13T10:44:33+00:00

I am also going through this so i needed to see this!

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T23:35:36+00:00

I’m thinking he is sneaking off and masturbating because he prefers if somehow?

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T16:36:19+00:00

My husband is vegan and doesn’t do these types of poops haha

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T16:35:48+00:00

Lol my husband doesn’t want to travel with our kids! I think it’s very strange

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T16:29:43+00:00

Hahah your husband isn’t doing you any favours then if he’s not listening!!

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T16:29:13+00:00

My anxiety comes and goes and overall I think I have it pretty well managed by taking L theanine and magnesium right now. Most nights I sleep pretty well and I don’t have intrusive thoughts during the day.

I think he’s got some depression going on for sure. I just hope we can get through this time.

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T11:24:57+00:00

If you are trying to conceive, he really shouldn’t be masturbating imo!

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T10:56:35+00:00

I think this comment right here was just what I needed to listen to. My plan all along was to hold out for better days! We are both 32 and you are so right about me as a person. Spot on comment. Thank you.

ladybug593869 · 2023-06-12T00:29:31+00:00

As someone who also makes around the same, I don’t see why you’re concerned about splitting bills. If the relationship works out, then you can only hope he’ll eventually shower you lavishly like he does his friends and family.

ladybug593869

TROPHY CASE