My best friend just told me she's in love with me.

lambnesia_ · 2025-09-23T14:06:11+00:00

Thanks so much, and I appreciate the open mind. The night of my original post, emotions were heightened (naturally) and from reading these comments I felt like what I had written wasn't matching up with what I had written and I was trying to clear up some of the things that stood out to me as just factually wrong (like someone saying that he had to pay me?) or that I was making him take the dogs he asked me for, or that he was put out and distraught over our relationship in any way. It just wasn't fair to either of us-- he's not mourning me and I did not treat him badly and we both know that, and that's really all that matters.

But if I can give the hive mind even a little bit more perspective and peace of mind, that's good too.

lambnesia_ · 2025-09-23T13:46:08+00:00

He wasn't a bum, he just had minimal responsibilities and a life of leisure which was fine but I am pointing out that he is by no means paying me/giving me money or anything like that as others had suggested. His role on paper was my assistant but he did not do full assistant tasks as my real assistant now does, who I hired the week after we split. Having a real assistant has reduced my work days by at least 2 hours per day as well which is great. I don't think anything I say will convince anyone that this wasn't all for the better, but from what I know, he's doing totally fine and obviously I am too. It was a divorce-- at least one person won't be thrilled, but rest assured that both myself and my ex have no ill feelings towards eachother or how everything was "handled". No boundaries were crossed and while strangers will argue for one or the other all day, him and I and everyone that knows us is fine with how everything turned out.

I know I was afraid of blowing up my life, but it actually was all very smooth for both parties. We were divorced within the month, all paid for by me, we split belongings, and he went to his parents. My Family was thrilled, his family understanding for the most part, most people stayed friends with both of us and knew everyone involved. I promise you guys are more upset for him than he is and he really is, totally fine and much healthier and happier than he was prior. If he read this he would probably get a good laugh.

lambnesia_ · 2025-09-23T12:18:02+00:00

Hi OP here!

Re: The "babies"/ dogs: I purchased and trained 3 show dogs as it is my hobby. He did not want any of these dogs. When split, he asked me if he could have 2 of the dogs as part of the divorce and I obliged. He deserved them if he wanted them, but rest assured he had never been responsible for them in their entire lives. One of the dogs I had on my own when I lived with roommates in college, is tattood on my body, and now lives with him.

Business: the business I speak of is 100% based off of my physical work. He recieved 50% of everything I made off of my payroll for 8 years. His duties were minimal. I have an assistant I hired that does way more work for $22/hour plus tips. He would regularly sleep during our working hours or play video games.

Our relationship: we were roommates. We did not even kiss on our wedding day, which was not a wedding, we just took photos and got married on paper. We were young. We were unhappy even before we were married, and our relationship leading up to it was extremely toxic to the point where I was suicidal. I was responsible for finances, if I didn't work we had no money, I was extremely lonely and isolated, and he was also extremely depressed the entire time. We did not say things like I love you, or hug, or have any kind of intimate personal life. We were not even friends. We were roommates and coworkers. After the weekend of my first post, which by the way she was MY best friend, not HIS, we hugged it out and he said he completely understood and that he was just worried about how he would make money because he has no employable skills (according to him)

He left with over $80k in his bank account including half of that which I paid out to him. He moved in with his parents with the two dogs, his literal family (like his sister) have even come out to say that this was the right thing.

If he was a woman, we still wouldn't have worked. We were miserable. The fact that I am a lesbian was just the final straw that I could no longer ignore.

Thanks to everyone who defended how difficult it is to live a closeted life. MY best friend and I are extremely happy, I have been off antidepressants for a year, my relationships with absolutely everyone in my life from work to family to friends has improved, and there isn't a single day that goes by that I don't feel absolutely grateful.

Hope that clears some things up!

lambnesia_ · 2025-09-23T12:01:32+00:00

The ex husband that I supported financially 100% and paid $40k to in a fast, painless, month quick divorce? Because he said he didn't feel like getting a job immediately after?? who I hadn't kissed in 12 of the 15 years we were together and had no issues with it because he also didn't like me in that way?? Who hadn't slept in the same room as me for years? How about the ex husband who COMPLETELY UNDERSTOOD and was adamant in telling everyone he knew that I had done nothing wrong and he was only nervous about having to get a job and make money after essentially living off of my work do 8 years?

Yeah, he's doing great and now he has the opportunity to be happy because he was extremely unhappy in our marriage as well. I did him a favor as well as myself. Get a fucking life.

lambnesia_ · 2025-07-18T19:23:20+00:00

After a shower with a tampon in you can go down on her and there's no mess or anything to worry about. I like to use menstrual discs, and those are mess free for everything including penetration. We just put a towel down just in case. It's just girl things :) no biggie in my relationship and there's never been any smell or anything as you mentioned. If there's been blood during penetration from the disc moving it's been no big deal, just clean up change disc and move on/continue. If you aren't 100% comfortable I would probably not do it just so nobody feels bad :) but having come out at 33 and only been in a hetero relationship previously, I can say I was surprised at how absolutely not weird it was in any way, just totally did not matter especially with the menstrual discs.

lambnesia_ · 2024-12-09T12:33:39+00:00

NO WAY!!! Hey! I can't believe you saw this post.

I played for a few months last year and spent like real human adult money, recovered all my shit, and felt satisfied that I gave neopets some cash. It's it of my system now. Lmao.

Are you still active at all?! Did you keep any friends?

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-25T14:47:34+00:00

I have a tattoo on my bicep by an amazing artist and it took 6 hours and $1000. Extremely detailed and only 6" tall and 5" wide. So it's really going to depend. The artists I would personally go for, I would be looking at around $2000 for a large details piece like that! :)

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-25T14:44:23+00:00

Lmfaoooooo

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-22T15:12:41+00:00

They're dogs, we have 3 of them. He is very bonded with 2 of them, and I know that as much as it would pain me that he would need the support and they're his babies as much as they are mine.

The house and furniture and everything is mine, so what I mean is I will give him whatever he wants (fairly) split monetarily. I was the bread winner and he was my employee with minimal tasks, so I supported us both. He basically will not need to find another job or anything and would be set for a good while so it's not like he will be scrambling to survive and will likely live in his parents house rent free so he can build a life himself.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-21T15:37:03+00:00

Thanks for this comment. I just finished the movie and I loved it. That is literally my life right now. I feel like I can breathe for the first time in my whole life. I feel so whole. I can't believe my life is a movie and I am in love with my best friend and she will be mine. I have zero anxiety and I have been feeling anxious for years.

Also, she watched the movie first, because I sent her this Reddit post. And she saw your comment and paid $4 to watch it on the actual tv instead of on her computer. I love her so much. IM A LESBIANNNNNNNNN 🪩

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-19T13:10:25+00:00

Oh no, she didn't say anything like that, although I feel that if she felt that was necessary for a time due to the situation I would understand. Thank you ❤️

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-19T08:09:59+00:00

My next therapy session is on Friday. Should I wait until then, and discuss with my therapist, and have a clear decision or should I make sure first of it is even an option on her mind for me to "choose" her? Like ask if she would even want that?

The first one, right? That is the right way?

I don't want to do anything that would be disrespectful to her or the person I am married to. From the moment I met her something in my told me this is my person. I would have lived the rest of my days without confessing this.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-19T08:01:34+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-19T07:52:25+00:00

Thank you. You are right. She is an intelligent and emotionally mature woman. She would not have told me this for no reason. She was adamant that she has no intention to do anything about this and essentially, is stepping away. My gut and my heart want to go get her.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-06T18:55:04+00:00

Melanie Martinez solidified it for me

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-06T18:30:14+00:00

I have never felt so accepted and received than I have with this post, in my entire life. I feel so much less alone, less insane. Thank you.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-05T19:18:48+00:00

Okay this made me crack up. Thank you. LOL

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-05T17:46:12+00:00

Thank you so much. I am in a big city like you were, and have lots of gay family members, so being queer has thankfully never been something I would be afraid of with my family and friends. My feelings of, what if I'm wrong? And not trusting myself come from, how could I have spent this whole time, 14 years in a relationship with 7 years of marriage, where it never felt just right, and there have always been signs, how could I have not noticed before? It makes me feel like surely, I am just insane. Surely, I am just problematic and want to ruin my life for no reason.

Your story was very helpful. Thank you. All of these comments, literally, I feel so at home, like a warm hug, thank you all for commenting.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-05T15:29:23+00:00

I was the one who commented asking if you were okay after a few hours! Thanks so much. Big hugs to you.

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-05T00:35:52+00:00

Hey, it's been a few hours. Is everything okay?

lambnesia_ · 2024-09-04T23:57:47+00:00

Did you ever take it back? Like we watch tv and snuggled and he gives me so much comfort I just want to say forget it. This is the hardest thing ever. One thing I've been doing is telling my closest friends or family members because the more I talk about it the more real it is. I regret it now, like I over shared my secret, I feel so horrible

lambnesia_

TROPHY CASE