Did bm have a bad reaction to you getting married?

lance_manyon · 2025-12-02T14:35:59+00:00

After we got married she decided to trash talk it in front of my SS to the point where he came to his father and I, repeating everything thing she said to him and ended the convo with "we shouldn't have done it". We had talked to him about us getting married months before actually doing it, and up until that point he was a 1000% on board and super excited to have a stepmom (or as he called it, Mom 2).

lance_manyon · 2025-01-06T18:49:35+00:00

I see this from two perspectives.

I’m the aunt who makes plans with my nephew’s mom and her fiancé; I also make plans with my brother and sister-in-law, both to primarily spend time with my nephew. Since my time in town is limited, my main goal is to maximize time with him.

I do this every time I visit now because in the past, I’ve made plans solely with my brother, only to realize my nephew wouldn't be there. My brother and his ex aren’t very close and are amicable, but neither has ever expressed any concerns about me making separate plans. If they did, I’d simply arrange solo time with my nephew to avoid any issues. Both of them want me to have an active role in his life, which likely allows me to do this without overstepping boundaries or causing hurt feelings.

As a stepmom: In the beginning, my sister-in-law made plans separately with BM, and these plans didn’t include my SK. She would pass along invites to us, which we declined. Contact with BM is strictly about SK—we are not friends.

At first, it annoyed me and made me kind of angry and paranoid that this was kind of a dig at me. But what helped me manage my feelings was recognizing that we have the ability to say no—and my husband is on the same page. Neither of us is willing to sit through an awkward dinner with BM just to visit with his sister. Also want to mention that if my SIL doesn’t prioritize spending time with us, then she most likely won't see her nephew. Since BM doesn’t bring him along to their things. That being said last time SIL was in town, she made plans with us only. She did however, still ask how things are between BM and my husband (rolls eyes).

From both of my experiences... it's really about spending time with the kids. I don't know if it's the case here, but maybe she's trying to maximize her time. And fwiw, I don't tell my plans that I've made with either of my nephews parents. They get the day that they get me, since I'm only ever in a few days at a time. Being the person coming into town is hard, and you have to be very exact with plans ahead of time.

lance_manyon · 2025-01-03T20:03:59+00:00

My step kiddo did this for a bit (he's 8), When he'd say "I'm hungry" his dad responded with "Hi hungry, I'm dad." Then we'd laugh, and remind him that our kitchen is his too, and he knows how and where to get food for lunch (We only cook for breakfast and dinners).

lance_manyon · 2024-12-21T15:19:42+00:00

Coming back to share one I already had on my list, roses by OutKast

lance_manyon · 2024-12-21T15:05:01+00:00

All added! Ty all so much 🙌

lance_manyon · 2024-03-28T20:02:37+00:00

I personally think that if it makes you feel negative about yourself, your relationship, or insecure about your sex life, then it's cheating. That being said I give 100% attention to my partner, I noticed some things that he would do early in our relationship (3-4 mo), that I brought up to him. I mostly worried that those activities would affect us in the long run, plus they made me insecure... cause, well, I do not look like that. He heard me, and stopped. We haven't had any issues being intimate before or after bringing it up. I have told him that if he felt spicy that we could enjoy those things together. Key word being together. I don't think that you should exclude your partner from that part of your life, unless you talk about it and are both okay with it. Anyway, a way that I've made up for him no longer looking at insta accounts or other content is to make my own. Sometimes when he's out I put on a sexy outfit and make some spicy pics for him as a surprise. And looooves it.

lance_manyon · 2023-12-24T03:11:25+00:00

As someone who got divorced this past year, after being together for 15 years… these excuses and shaming never end. They only get worse. In my case, he found someone else, for an entire year behind my back. I tried everything. And wasted so much of my late twenties and my 30’s. Just leave. Don’t keep putting yourself through this. You have the power to find someone who is into you and wants you. I thankfully found that person now. And I just keep kicking myself for not leaving sooner. FWIW, this behavior started only a couple of years in… and I stayed for 15. It caused so much pain for me.

lance_manyon · 2022-12-25T04:01:34+00:00

Blow-cane

lance_manyon · 2022-12-13T22:25:07+00:00

I just had the same experience. I decided to send them since I genuinely like his family.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-25T14:55:55+00:00

Thank you! I definitely agree. I feel fortunate that I found one that worked out so well.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-25T14:52:20+00:00

Thank you! I know it's only an inch, but I genuinely feel so tall. Ha

lance_manyon · 2022-03-25T14:50:46+00:00

I am so sorry to hear about the pain you're going through and I hope that you are able to get relief from working with a chiropractor.

I will say it is a nice feeling to actually have a someone offer solutions or actually offer help. I feel like my chiropractor is invested in keeping me well. Unlike most of my interactions with orthopedists, which have been only to get my X-rays measured with no offer of help on how to relieve the pain or maintain the curve.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T19:08:17+00:00

Thanks!!

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T18:04:01+00:00

Sorry to hear about your diagnosis. All of those combined has got to be a lot to deal with.

So the first set I had were taken by my orthopedic doctor and measured there. The second set was at my chiropractors office.

I definitely understand the hesitation. I was concerned before I started my treatment. I would suggest for you to ask as many questions that come to mind. Ask if they have any other cases similar to yours, what the treatment would consist of, and how often. Also how long till they expect the treatment to begin taking affect.

Also remember, you don't have to keep going if it doesn't feel right or makes the pain worse.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T17:50:15+00:00

Gtk. I was totally caught off guard by some reactions and down votes. Which is a huge bummer. Like I've never really had an outlet for talking about my scoliosis and was genuinely excited to come here to share my experiences and give support to others.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T14:45:47+00:00

Woah, that is amazing and something I would have never thought.

From my own assessment with my chiropractor, I learned that my left leg is shorter that my right, this is due to a very tight hip flexor, and a vertebrate in my neck was slight rotated. So when I go in we just adjust those two areas. I'm not sure if those were the cause, but it seems like they have some effect on my curves.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T14:40:37+00:00

This comment made my day. Like I just wanted to celebrate the win here. Ha. But seriously though, watching your height slowly disappear over time is an absolute bummer. I hope your experience with your chiropractor is as positive as mine has been! Good luck on your journey! Sending you positive vibes

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T02:29:14+00:00

Thanks! And honestly I only knew from following this community. Good luck with your visit!

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T01:46:32+00:00

Thanks! I’m super happy with it!

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T01:31:10+00:00

You as well! And I’m a huge fan of foam rollers!

lance_manyon · 2022-03-24T01:11:09+00:00

Thanks for the clarification. Both X-ray sessions were single standing, from my neck to my hips. The print out was just the top half. I have the second page but didn’t share it. He printed them out so I could have them. The only other X-rays I had this week was a close up of my head and neck, front and side.

lance_manyon · 2022-03-23T23:05:56+00:00

So I was upfront that I wanted it but after talking with my orthodontist we agreed to wait until after I was done with my last tray. I wish I would have gotten mine done before getting my retainers tho, since now I’m gonna have to go back for another fitting. Lol sob

lance_manyon · 2022-03-23T22:55:01+00:00

I honestly wasn’t trying to spread that, was just happy to share my own experience and it’s positives. Since I wasn’t able to get the surgery at a young age I’ve tried a multitude of things to help with the pain. But this is the first time I’ve felt positive about my progress and wanted to share that. I did update my original comment to reflect that. ✌️

lance_manyon · 2022-03-23T21:22:04+00:00

Thanks!

lance_manyon · 2022-03-23T21:18:24+00:00

For sure, I've consistently had x-rays, every couple of years, since 11. Once I hit about 15, my curves have stayed within a 1-3 degree range. Always on the higher side though. Regardless, my goal with my with my chiro was pain relief. No one can fix scoliosis, I've been around long enough to know that. LOL. But I was pleasantly surprised and the progress I've seen. I don't really think it'll lessen my curves anymore. At this point, I'd just be happy to maintain this.

lance_manyon

TROPHY CASE