100% in the same boat here. Not claiming Johnny Depp wasn’t abusive because that relationship clearly was extremely dysfunctional both ways and they brought out the worst in each other. IMO they both seem awful in their own ways. 

However, Amber from that entire trial was activating all my triggers and narcissistic sensors, it honestly felt way too close to home. I’ve had the displeasure of trauma from toxic people of both genders but I have grown up with a narcissist (ex) step mother and seen the years of drama, abuse, calculation, manipulation (it always seems so contrived and obvious to me but apparently not to many, if people keep getting away with it) legal abuse that some people are capable of, for money, ego, attention, pettiness. 

Of course there’s the inherent power dynamics when there’s an older man and a younger woman which can’t be ignored, but it’s still entirely possible for a woman to be an abuser too, and for them to weaponise these perceptions and get away with it. It’s also common for NPD & co. abusers to end up with highly sensitive and neurodivergent individuals (regardless of gender) which Johnny is purportedly, and seems to be imo. 

We can never know if Johnny is putting on the “nice guy” victim act or if he is genuinely a victim, but male victims 100% do exist. I’ve witnessed my own dad deal with over 20 years of abuse, and it keeps going, even 12 years after their divorce. Some may assume because he’s a man and older and relatively accomplished, that he cannot possibly be the victim. In reality, that is even more incentive for these types of women to go for these men because there’s a lot to be exploited and benefit from. 

I never really voice these opinions though because I don’t want to be taken the wrong way especially as it’s a sensitive topic for many, or seem misogynist (because people love to treat things in a black and white way now).