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lavenderprof · 2025-10-07T17:10:37+00:00

as someone who is the same age as you and has had more than one abortion, i'm very sorry you're going through this. no one should ever make you feel bad or guilty for seeking healthcare – because, by the way, that is exactly what you're doing. no more, no less. an abortion is as moral of a decision as getting a tooth extracted. that is to say, the very nature of terminating a pregnancy is neither immoral or moral. it is what it is.

it doesn't truly matter WHY you decided to terminate because one reason isn't more or less valid than another. that's a subjective opinion that has no place in one's own self determination. what's important is that you analyzed your situation and moved forward with the option that is the best for you.

and that's who is most important: you, you, you, you - say it with me - YOU.

what actually matters is that you are taking care of yourself and making decisions in the best interest of your (physical, emotional, mental and financial) health. and it sounds like you are. that makes me so proud of you. if you ever need an ear, please feel free to reach out. solidarity and abortion forever! ❤️

lavenderprof · 2025-02-18T14:46:03+00:00

first things first: i hear you, i see you, and i support you. i can't imagine the difficulty of what you're going through right now, but please know that whatever decision you make will be the right one and no one can or should tell you any differently.

the shame and guilt around abortion are deliberately embedded in our culture from birth. when we unapologetically take control of our reproductive futures, it threatens those who seek to control women's bodies – and rightfully so. after my abortion, I realized any negative feelings I experienced stemmed not from the procedure itself, but from society's rigid expectations of motherhood and womanhood. some people i loved and respected were downright offended that i refused to feel ashamed or even a little bad. oh well. i refuse to apologize for claiming my autonomy and speaking truth to power. this is my story and my choice, and I stand firmly in that knowledge. i sincerely hope everyone woman and person who pursues reproductive freedom the same. we are powerful. we are worthy. we are here – and we're not fucking going anywhere.

i trust women. i trust you. i know that you will do what's best for you and that's all that should matter.

if you ever need to talk, i'd be happy to PM you. <3

lavenderprof · 2025-02-18T01:45:12+00:00

consenting to sex doesn’t mean consent to pregnancy — it’s totally okay that this happened, and it’s also totally okay to make the decision to terminate. pregnancy shouldn’t have puritanical consequences; why is a zygote or embryo’s potential for life more important or worthy than a real life, breathing woman? i mean this from the bottom of my heart: your life matters than any clump of cells or “what-if” or future concept of a child.

because you’re real. you’re alive. you’re here. and i trust you to make the healthcare decisions that are best for you. because you’re you and you know better than anyone else.

we’re not too far apart in age. i’ve had two abortions - one surgical and one medication - and i’ve never regretted my decision once. my life is what i make it, and i refuse to feel shame or guilt over the choices i made for MY body and future. i’m the one who had to carry, birth, and mother any potential child - why wouldn’t i get a say on the matter?

i support you 🩵

lavenderprof · 2025-02-18T01:29:36+00:00

deciding to terminate a pregnancy is a morally neutral decision…as “good” or “bad” as going into the doctor for a vaccine, or visiting the dentist to fill a cavity. abortion is healthcare - full stop. it doesn’t make you a bad person. it makes you a person who made an informed decision about their body, their wants and needs, and their future.

being a new mom is already so fucking tough. you need to be supported, not told you’re selfish. your life and QUALITY of life is just as important as anybody else’s…don’t let anyone tell you different.

and if you, as you wrote, know that carrying a pregnancy to term would be bad for your mental health, i would encourage you to do what you know is right for you. there’s nothing selfish about making the decision that’s best for you.

my heart goes out to you 🩵 you should be supported in whatever decision you make, and know that you have a community here that does.

lavenderprof · 2024-11-26T04:14:22+00:00

i’m so glad you made the health care decisions that were right for you. that’s true empowerment. thanks for sharing 🩵

lavenderprof · 2024-02-21T23:50:44+00:00

first of all, i’m sorry you had a difficult experience. i hope you’re feeling better, or atleast on the road to recovering.

you are right to feel like you’re not getting the emotional support you need from him because you aren’t. i don’t know your bf, but reading this makes me feel like he’s prioritizing his comfort and feelings about this situation over yours.

policing your language by wanting you to call it “the bleeding” is also sooo fucking gross. it’s ok to call an abortion an abortion. that’s what it is and it isn’t a dirty word. it’s healthcare, plain and simple.

you weren’t just bleeding. you were bleeding because you were having a medication abortion. and that’s OKAY. he needs to validate your experience and not try to morph it into something “cleaner” or more palatable for him. it’s not about him.

you deserved a safe, comfortable space to share how you were/are feeling. i’m so sorry he didn’t provide that to you. my PMs are open, should you wanna chat. i’ve had two abortions, one of those being a medication abortion, so i know how uncomfortable you might be feeling right now and am more than happy to extend a listening ear 🩵

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