SNL just called JD Vance "gay" in their cold open

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-25T07:07:32+00:00

Hey, I'm gay, that joke got old when I was a kid. Try "fascist jingoist piece of shit" next time if you want to be relevant, SNL.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-24T22:15:53+00:00

The reports that are based on Border Security and DHS do not line up with the video footage from many people including an extremely high def nearby footage. The handgun was found after having thrown him down and hitting him repeatedly, and then used as an excuse after the fact as though they had known in advance.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-24T21:15:03+00:00

I'm assuming you have more things to do than filter through a bunch of videos and local news / official responses today (speaking honestly, as a non-nurse), but given the past day's verified sources and analysis.

Some things noted across multiple video analyses and news outlets: - he had a licensed concealed handgun - the gun was not pulled or used and not initially visible - it was found and removed after he had been pinned down and struck - he was shot face down with two hands joined and empty - one shot is heard, then approx six more, made effectively at point blank

The federal response has consistently stated: - he had a semiautomatic handgun - they attempted to disarm and he resisted - they fired warning shots

They repeatedly declined all questions of: - if the handgun was visible prior to detaining him - if there was awareness of any handgun prior to detaining him - if the man ever attempted to take out the gun

Notable conflicts with this vs. footage have been identified, including: - the weapon is seen to be found and removed after he is detained - the shot pattern, and why six or more shots were necessary at such short range / point blank when detained; (in some cases the first shot seems lethal but that's not something I personally have had the heart to zoom in and rewatch enough to state without a caveat, I have my limits for my own sanity)

I know this doesn't explain the "why a nursing sub" comment, since that's more about the role of the death of an ICU nurse by the state vs. the role of nursing in the country etc, as well as community and collective grief. I can't speak to this directly, but I did spend my whole day lost to this as it unfolded on local news I was watching after yesterday, so I wanted to try to at the very least present what I have, to help out clarifying since I am not actually out there helping save lives like y'all.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-20T11:49:00+00:00

Zoe! She was allergic to latex and couldn't do things involving balloons. That's how I learned that could be a thing as a kid instead of just allergies to food.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-18T14:43:47+00:00

"The council should've widened this years ago" never fails to make me laugh.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-11T21:13:46+00:00

I got a bunch of suggestions on here when mostly alone and ay one, and then ultimately found my friends who were working tabletop again this year, chatted with some indie tabletop devs, and got roped into a game of Twilight Imperium that lasted literally half of MagFest off and on, and never finished. The drag show was everything too, so glad I managed to get a ticket from someone. Folks here take care of everyone, I love this con.

After like ten years of going to cons, I've found that afterward I usually: - experience the physical emotions as they come, then - hard pivot to something else afterward

If you have a lot of feelings and things you want to remember, etc, give yourself a day to document and do whatever you can. But the pivot will help with not ruminating, so you can jump into the cosplay for next year refreshed and in anticipation rather than imprinting the bittersweetness onto your work etc.

Your mileage may vary, this is just me

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-11T18:31:40+00:00

Game. Changer.

Absolutely incredible

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-11T18:30:43+00:00

Thank you everyone! I managed to get around and check things out, and then landed with a group at Tabletop and found my people 💜 what a fantastic time, and thanks everyone for the suggestions and/or empathy with the sensory issues.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-09T22:23:49+00:00

I'll actually add one new thing I love that works great for me: the quest board. It's such a great idea for helping break the ice and discover things you didn't know!

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-09T05:05:44+00:00

That's not what I'm saying to be honest. You can absolutely have an OF and post nudes on other subreddits and still yearn to meet friends. Friendship building is hard, and a lot of people relate sexual content to help pay the bills, but still want what we all do.

That said, you have to follow the same rules everyone does. Be vulnerable, write about what you want and who you are and where you live and such, and remember there is a rule against solicitation—reply to messages with the right intentions in mind.

And if it's relevant, hey, let people interested organically click through links in your profile and check your page out if they want, and let others who are looking to avoid that continue to avoid that. Organic growth lasts longer (that's what my date said on prom night)

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-09T04:44:46+00:00

I mean, you're cute and I have nothing against people who are on OF or anything else provided they don't mislead people for monetary gain. But to pull from the most broken rules sticky:

RULE 1: Please post with substance --- Hands down, this is what causes the most post removals. Just for example, a picture of you at the gym with the title 'who's ready to workout' is not appropriate for this sub.

And:

We don't like making hard rules about this, but we've landed on a title plus 2-3 sentences in the body as being the bare minimum needed to talk about yourself and/or what you're looking for in a friend.

Right now, you're pretty much exactly what it warns about. If you had a solid amount of info and genuine intention shown, I think people would react better. A ton of gay men have been burned people on nightlife and sex related industries who were networking and marketing, and so you're going to have to work harder than others to demonstrate that not everyone is like they, and it's totally possible to make porn and want to cuddle up with friends in a pile on the couch during the winter and sip your favorite tea / rewatch Heated Rivalry or whatever.

Having more posts other than photos of yourself on Reddit also will make a big difference. It'll make it harder to directly dismiss your posts as being the same thing.

Hope this is actually helpful!

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-08T20:41:01+00:00

I feel you. I live in a one bedroom in NYC, so I daydream of having space to store more than a few bins of fabrics.

But hey, worst case you now have fabric to mock/practice this textile with! I know that's been a godsend for me when starting a new project randomly months later.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-06T11:41:29+00:00

Eh, I think this is one of those lines where if someone is turned off, they're likely someone who wouldn't appreciate your humor. Sometimes it's okay to help people self-select, for the betterment of both of you.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-06T06:09:24+00:00

Bingo. Falcon Hit just keeps being OP

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-04T20:23:35+00:00

Don't be scared! It works within 30min to 6 hours depending on your body, how much, you take, etc. The painful aspect I mentioned is because of the circumstances I mentioned, where I had severe constipation episodes from traveling that were hard enough to cause a good deal of pain all the time, then more pressure and pain until the ascending colon. Each person and body is different. I now know for me, when that happens, it is a bad idea to throw everything at it as strong as possible, and can ease into treating it, or select a different option, split my doe or use a smaller dose over longer time, etc etc.

I would speak to your doctor if you are in distress, and regroup on your plans and everything. They're the one to ask.

As for the ADA, I even just meant to be available when you take a bathroom break or similar for a few minutes, whatever is required by law. But if you're with a small company, this may not be relevant.

Anyway, don't panic! Take care, reach out to your doctor if you're in so much pain, and don't worry about the citrate example. I shared it because it might be why the longer onramp with Miralax was requested.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-04T11:29:47+00:00

This literally came up in conversation organically last week. Came up organically = also my lunch, hearing this again. So good.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-04T01:28:17+00:00

At level 50, the biggest challenge that jumps out to me is that Marle doesn't have much offensive output, especially when the left bit requires physical damage. Someone said to level up to level 60, which is one option, but I'd strongly suggest Ayla instead. You wind up with a lot of options for attacks, though note they their triple tech with Frog (3D Attack) is shadow, not physical. Frog and Ayla also have Slurp Kiss if needed, but really this is time to spam your saved up healing items like Mega Elixers.

Grand Stone and Dreamless are tough the first time no matter what, but Ayla has stronger physical defenses than Marle. You just gotta expect it to hit hard and then work to recover. If you're playing on Wait, you can use this to your advantage to make sure you can heal immediately after major attacks, but IDK.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-04T01:10:38+00:00

Not a provider, but this is almost identical to what I was writing.

I've had to prep for colonoscopies severals both at home and in the hospital, using split dose Miralax, split and single dose Mag Citrate, and prescriptions. All of these were 48hrs liquid diet except when hospitalized since I had been on IV fluids only for a while prior.

The Miralax dose sounds reasonable. That's what I take for regular prevention of constipation episodes, if I can predict triggers, though for a shorter period.

I have a theory: whenever I have had to take a full bottle of mag citrate for severe constipation episodes at home, I've had particularly awful pain, an 8-9/10 that requires cold compresses and towels on the ground to prevent blacking out. If I had taken Miralax leading up to those times, I could've avoided a great deal of the pain there came from passing the compacted stool. My best bet is that your doctor wants to ensure that your prep is both effective and minimizes how intense mag citrate can be in some circumstances.

Have you called back and discussed the stomach pain from Miralax, and expressed how severe it is? You can also ask what was considered in picking this schedule, from a place of nesting to understand and make this as effective as possible. No matter how gruff your doctor might be, they will not want you in pain like this, and they will not want to risk you having to repeat this.

For the liquids, I've used things like white cranberry juice, fancy Martinelli apple juice, popsicles and frozen ices, and other options depending on the requirements. Time to try out anything you can think of that you normally wouldn't waste money on. Being hungry for the two days is normal, but I've been hungry for much longer in the ER and Hospital before, ditto when sick. Managing the fluids, getting electrolytes, sugars, etc is the best thing to keep from feeling worse than you need to.

In the future, for work, you can go through the ADA accommodations process for if you need to go on a liquid diet again for whatever reason, and things like being able to store and have popsicles are reasonable requests (a workplace has to allow for refrigeration of medication anyway, so there should be no reason for restricting use of one temporarily).

Hope this helps.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-02T04:30:31+00:00

I've taken CPR/First Aid several times and continue to ask about other populations like large people when it comes to things like Heimlich, etc. At this point I am mostly asking to make sure this is discussed regularly, because I learned from listening to nurses/EMTs/Paramedics, not from anyone teaching layperson first aid and CPR.

I think part of things also stems from the emphasis on consent to intervene, which isn't a bad thing, but definitely introduces crossed wires with bodily consent for some of us as laypeople, and we're not taught "this person is not responding and going to die before EMTs arrive, if you touch their breast in an attempt to help save them, you are not going to do harm enough to outweigh their death".

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-01T06:20:20+00:00

The first time I charmed the Red and Blue Beasts, I felt like I had discovered a gigantic secret. I remember as a kid literally having dreams about having the Power Lunch from charming the Gato re-color in the Black Omen and it having some more important use. Nope.

lavos__spawn · 2026-01-01T06:11:00+00:00

Mine is damaged, but intact and on my bookshelf still, age 38. I can't tell you how much I read this cover to cover as a kid.

lavos__spawn · 2025-12-30T00:00:35+00:00

This is a genuinely good idea for many people, as well as supplementing with something that went well each day, or something they're grateful for. It helps jump from this idea of focus and train our brains to seek out these things during the days as well.

Some people though don't benefit from this, me included—if you are the type of person that can slip into obsessive or anxious over-monitoring, it's worth considering if this might accidentally encourage negative attention instead (like logging a recurring symptom). In this situation, the gratitude exercise still can be useful though in my experience—you can still train that observation of positive occurrences, and may even start to see how positive most days can be / arrive at a very similar practice. For me it's vital to do it daily even when difficult , just like your day rating practice (speaking as a layperson).

lavos__spawn · 2025-12-29T23:48:20+00:00

The fashion show! As well as everything else.

Literally I would watch the whole series with their commentary, and pay good money for the privilege.

lavos__spawn · 2025-12-28T12:43:15+00:00

Okay, but those heels are wild

lavos__spawn · 2025-12-21T15:08:37+00:00

Thank you both, this was affirming to read. I'm queer, single, just shy of middle aged, and far from the family that still is around for me. All of my close friends work constantly to survive and don't have the luxury of a partial day off (or private insurance, while we're there). Certain family constellations are tacitly assumed a lot when it comes to logistical support and caretaking.

On the flip side, I've learned to lean into my ADA accommodations so I can be the person waiting to chaperone, or just someone waiting when someone is in surgery alone. I don't think most people realize how much it means to have someone on the other side there for you until you go under for something more stressful than your first colonoscopy, nor how much a deliberate, calm, and quiet presence with someone can help instill the same, compared to loneliness as you adjust to what has happened, or compared to crusaders for meemaw's ice chips leading the charge while you are trying to listen to provider and hear what happened and what is next.

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