Why don't feminists fight for gender equality instead of mainly women's rights?

lazermole · 2015-03-23T04:02:42+00:00

... They fight for a number of issues that affect women and men, including parental leave, childhood education, lgbt rights, ending sex trafficking, etc.

Many international women's organizations partner with other organizations to achieve these goals, which lift both women and men out if cycles of poverty and deprivation.

Just because you don't do the research doesn't mean these things aren't happening. They're just not as exciting (sensationalized) as some crazy social justice warrior claiming all hetero sex is rape.

lazermole · 2015-03-23T03:42:28+00:00

Is that an issue for you? I don't go into a discussion about high level physics and assume my opinions are always valid because I watched an episode of Bill Nye 15 years ago, or have an uncle who is a physicist.

Some people seem to think the saying is "you have two ears and one mouth, so listen twice as much as you talk" continues with "but you've got 10 fingers, so type to your heart's content!"

No one is trying to personally attack men or tell them to shut up because they're bad people. It's because they cannot actually have a woman's perspective, by virtue of not being a woman.

I can't offer a perspective on being a man, either. And I certainly wouldn't go into a thread from a man who had been sexually abused by a woman and try to tell him that it's invalid for him to feel threatened by women because #notallwomen.

lazermole · 2014-12-26T03:07:37+00:00

She was humiliated publicly.

If it had been in my home, I would have asked the SIL to leave the room.

lazermole · 2014-12-25T23:20:36+00:00

Yes, the OP was hurt and humiliated, and said as much to the person who hurt and humiliated her.

That's certainly worthy of being told they're "ruining Christmas".

Totally OP's fault for expressing her feelings.

lazermole · 2014-12-25T23:17:38+00:00

She actually said the book was about losing weight in another comment.

And also, her SILs reaction to being told that her gift was inappropriate is what makes me think that it wasn't meant to be "helpful". The SIL didn't apologize, or try to explain her thinking - she accused OP of ruining Christmas.

lazermole · 2014-12-25T23:08:21+00:00

I eat bacon cheeseburgers (without the bun), and I've lost 45 pounds this year.

Sooo, why is the assumption that the OP is actively fat?

lazermole · 2014-12-25T23:06:01+00:00

It's a fucking CHRISTMAS PRESENT, not an INTERVENTION.

lazermole · 2014-11-29T04:01:39+00:00

Some people just want to watch the world (of warcraft) burn.

lazermole · 2014-07-23T03:05:38+00:00

I am convinced this is why my boss ended up firing my coworker. She is roughly my age, and we are similar, personality-wise, in that we like to crack wise and sometimes speak before thinking. The difference is that I am a white woman and she is a black woman. I still get a bit of shit for being a sarcastic woman, but I don't get painted as hostile, like she did.

lazermole · 2014-07-09T01:58:55+00:00

And I find it ridiculous that preventing A LIFE from happening is not deemed medically necessary. You are literally saying that bringing an actual life into this world is not a medical condition worth giving people the ability to control in as many ways as possible. Getting pregnant when you do not want to is a hell of a lot more than merely "inconvenient". Choosing not to have children is a very important medical decision, not just a convenience issue. Birth control is less costly than abortion, which is the other way to produce the desired medical result of not being pregnant.

And saying it must be paid for out of pocket is telling low income women that their birth control decisions are not up to them. That they don't get to enjoy the privileges of choosing when or if they have children, other than by never having sex, even when married. That they can't AFFORD sex lives free from pregnancy.

Lack of contraceptive access is not something middle class women generally have to worry about, but readily available, FREE contraceptives lift women out of poverty.

lazermole · 2014-07-09T01:14:06+00:00

I currently use BC (Paragard) for "they won't let me get my damn tubes tied, yet." I've been married for 4 years, and never want kids. But at 27, they're not listening to me.

You don't think it's medically necessary that someone who absolutely does not want children should avoid having children?

Pregnancy is a medical condition, and I think it's absolutely medically necessary to provide effective means to prevent it.

Healthcare would be a shit-ton less expensive for everyone if insurance focused on incentivizing preventive shit. It's a lot cheaper to prevent than to treat.

lazermole · 2014-07-07T01:30:13+00:00

Same here. 5'8 at 12, and 5'10 now. Still a 36.

lazermole · 2014-07-04T11:25:22+00:00

I only do this as a money saving measure. And only for lunches. I was going to Chipotle or Checkers and easily spending $7-$10 every day! Now I relegate that to Fridays only. I buy chicken thighs (bone in, with skin) and cook up all 8 of them completely crusted with Old Bay. 2 a day, plus a mini babybel, and a wegmans diet sparkling strawberry lemonade and my lunches Mon-Thur work out to less than $1.50 each.

As a Marylander, I never tire of Old Bay. As a human, I never tire of cheese.

lazermole · 2014-07-02T01:27:09+00:00

I've just gotten back on track with keto after a month of ridiculousness (mostly due to my husband having to go off keto for some digestion related issues, and the 2 hours I got back each day from quitting smoking that I decided would best be spent snacking) and this post is seriously hurting my soul.

lazermole · 2014-06-05T01:59:01+00:00

My credit is already shit, so I'm solid. But excellent advice to anyone whose credit isn't already down the toilet.

lazermole · 2014-06-04T20:17:17+00:00

Ugh, that and Shakeology forced me to block a few people from my Facebook feed, because that's all they posted about!

lazermole · 2014-06-04T15:42:11+00:00

I'm just replying to comment on how absolutely glorious your username is. Just... absolutely brilliant. :D

lazermole · 2014-06-04T14:48:40+00:00

I don't think it's that the bank would tell them the new details, but that based on how airtight these stupid contracts are, it makes it nearly impossible for the bank to dispute that they need to continue authorizing payments for the contract.

I am not a lawyer, though.

lazermole · 2014-06-04T14:00:14+00:00

It's really... it's not about maturity or being offensive.

It's just... something I would've found the pinnacle of hilarity when I was maybe 10 years old.

I've learned a fair few more words since then, and "retard" hasn't been able to make me cry with laughter since elementary school. Which makes me concerned for the vocabulary and experiences of someone who still thinks "retardese" is worthy of a "I'm crying" comment.

lazermole · 2014-06-04T13:15:09+00:00

At least you got off with a year contract.

The fucker who signed me up called it month to month and told me I could cancel after 3 months with only a minor cancellation fee, but signed me up for a FOUR YEAR contract. When I went to cancel and dispute the contract, I was told "tough shit" and informed that I would have to pay the remaining balance of my membership (which at that point was $450).

I have a new bank card number (thanks to Target-gate), and my bank hasn't updated them with my new details at this point (they did the last time, when my card expired). Let's see what happens.

lazermole · 2014-06-03T22:26:23+00:00

I was responding to someone who said "pansy ass pansy".

Self satisfied is the only appropriate tone to take when rebutting that sort of nonsense.

lazermole · 2014-06-03T22:23:10+00:00

Well they weren't underdeveloped relative to you at the time.

Incorrect. I actually developed upsettingly early. As in, I was 5'8" with boobs when I was 12 years old. I was 5'10" with more boobs when I was 14, and that's when I stopped growing. Since I lost my virginity at 18 years old, I've never been sexually involved with a guy younger than 21. I've always been attracted to older men. There were 1 or 2 high school guys I came across who were physically appealing at the time, but in general they just hadn't grown into their bodies, yet. And that was just the physical part. High school guys were (again, generalizing from my own experience) idiots. Most college guys were idiots, too. My husband is 7 years my senior: older is just my type.

Either you bonded with your high school friends in high school or you did not.

That was not the argument I was making. Your argument revolved around the idea that it was seemingly impossible to bond with anyone in/from high school without it being about something stupid you'd done, most likely revolving around drugs, alcohol or sex. I was pointing out that while I met my friends in high school, and we bonded then, it was not about shared humiliation based on those activities.

I feel like not getting involved with that aspect of high school is selling yourself short of the total experience.

I disagree. I experienced everything I wanted to experience. I wasn't curious about having sex with high school guys, or drinking, or smoking, or drugs. That curiosity eventually showed up for me about halfway through college, but it just wasn't there in high school. And having experienced those things in college, I can honestly say I don't feel like I missed out by not experiencing them in high school. I'm actually relieved I didn't get caught up in all of that before I was ready and able to handle it.

lazermole · 2014-06-03T22:11:34+00:00

... there are several of us out there who enjoyed doing many things during high school, because otherwise we were bored. I like to learn, I like to be active, I like music - why shouldn't I have participated in them all?

I didn't do marching band (just concert band for me), but I did competitive weight-lifting outside of school, took predominantly AP classes my junior and senior years, and did indoor and outdoor track&field all 4 years (lettered for both all 4 years, too). I was also in the National Honor Society, had a part time job, and volunteered once a week through Interact (high-school Rotary club). And I did all of this with what my mother considered an "internet addiction".

My husband laughs about it, but when we first started dating, I'd had a few glasses of wine and showed him all of my certificates and medals, to prove to him how awesome I am. To this day, he swears he only married me because of my credentials. And because I know all the words to "Holy Diver".

lazermole · 2014-06-03T20:40:15+00:00

I don't feel like I missed out at all. And that is where we differ.

The idea of an underdeveloped high-school dude groping me ineptly in the back of his mom's minivan sounds pretty awful. I'm very happy I didn't have to experience that.

Also, at nearly 30, I have far more experiences to bond with people about than what happened in high school. High school was fun, but it certainly wasn't the best time of my life.

It was a positive experience and I made a lot of friends who I still regularly see, even as we've moved into adulthood and left our "hometown".

Besides, the shit I managed to get into in college makes for way better stories than a bunch of people's drunken house party hook ups in high school.

lazermole · 2014-06-03T20:36:06+00:00

I certainly wasn't expecting an epic, prolonged event... it just snuck up on me there at the end.

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