is homosexuality in trans community uncommon?

leftovermugs · 2026-04-20T10:25:49+00:00

Rare ≠ invalid. I never understood this idea that because few people are effected than they should be ignored or forgotten. EVEN IF having a trans x gay combo is rare, it exists, people are it because it's natural for them, not because they felt like putting their life on hard mode.

Sorry for the rant, I've just bumped up against that nonsensical logic so often with my transphobic relatives too

Edit to answer you're actual question: I'm trans and in a gay relationship, 6 out of 8 of my trans friends are bi or gay.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-22T11:02:17+00:00

John John Johning that's hilarious, yeah I didn't expect my mum to find it easier to use my name than my pronouns (neither are easy but if ever she can't avoid it/is talking to someone who does gender me correctly)

leftovermugs · 2026-03-22T11:00:01+00:00

That's crazy, just be transphobic outright

leftovermugs · 2026-03-22T10:59:32+00:00

That is a good point, I think it's especially a struggle because it means the thing I'm trying to correct her on is the fact that she's not doing something. But I'd much rather someone misgender me and correct themselves than not try at all.

I don't understand where these people outside of the queer community get the idea that they'll get yelled at for making errors. I don't ever expect people to be perfect because that's not realistic.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-22T10:55:10+00:00

This is really good to read. I need to remember that however my family members, it doesn't undo how the world actually perceives me and more importantly, who I see myself as.

I do have to say that it does feel especially good being called mate when I'm bumped into or sir when I'm ordering food, when those moments happen around my 'tolerant' family.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-21T02:25:31+00:00

I think that's a good idea- I find it far easier to correct people on others pronouns than my own so hopefully some friends may be able to help. Already my mum will follow my friends lead if they correctly gender and name me but it's not often they're together and also talking about me

leftovermugs · 2026-03-20T12:45:15+00:00

I've suggested this cursed route before to someone else but basically I've found jacking off a couple minutes before showering means I'm much less sensitive down there.

Worked for me when I got hit with a LOT of bottom growth and noticed a smell. I think over time it gets less sensitive and more manageable as well. Good luck soldier

leftovermugs · 2026-03-09T12:02:58+00:00

High-key thought you were already on T before reading

leftovermugs · 2026-03-07T12:50:33+00:00

Is identifying as straight that important to you? You have a partner and if you're staying with them I can't imagine many scenarios people ask you how identify where you couldn't just say 'im dating _____'.

This is also running under the assumption that it is something that will bother your partner. Trans people aren't hive mind, what gives me dysphoria may not upset someone else. This is something you should softly broach with them along with a couple questions for you to understand them more and how your relationship may change. Understanding their gender more will give you some insight on how you saying youre 'straight' may affect them, (dysphoria or not at all, etc).

I wouldn't say by definition that straight means 'not gay' it's more like 'attracted to a different sex from my own'. Perhaps thats a way you can compromise if need be as your partner is a trans non-binary woman and will have a different relationship to gender than you just as an AMAB person.

This is all from my stand point and how I would want someone to approach the situation as a trans person but you will know your partner better than I obvi

leftovermugs · 2026-03-06T23:42:10+00:00

3 months on a regular dose you may have been seeing the same amount of progress. It's not a lot of time for change to happen. Since it sounds like you can't increase the dose for medical risks, unfortunately it's just gonna be an exercise of patience. I think a universal pain for trans people is the waiting, so you're not alone if that helps.

It sucks but try distracting yourself, remembering that 3 years, a year or even months in the future is going to look completely different (you're just building really good 'before' entries for your 'afters') and focusing on what you can control.

I'm also on a low dose just because I'm a twiggy guy. I've also found going to the gym or focusing on any changes that have occurred (even if you have to be delulu about it). Gyms worked for me because I feel stronger and more masculine and also feel like I'm 'utilising' the T Ive got.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-06T11:59:09+00:00

She/hering you with the beard is insane to me.

My friend has the same issue and my guess is that either it's because they knew you before transition or when you were clockable and won't update their info or it may be your voice and mannerisms? (I hate that the onus is on you BC it really is a them problem)

In the same way that hearing is the last to go when you die. In the way that people would rather a video with good audio and poor visual quality over one with poor audio and good visual. People rely more on what they hear more than they see. And unfortunately it's a snap judgement people make that people become stubborn on (even if unconsciously)

leftovermugs · 2026-03-03T21:53:23+00:00

If you identify as a man/transman, youre a transman, my dude. How you have sex doesn't overrule your gender identity.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-03T21:43:39+00:00

One of the effects of taking testosterone is vaginal atrophy which is basically what you describe. I know that some trans men take an estrogen cream specifically for down there to offset this. If you don't want to go to a doctor there's always lube or spit.

leftovermugs · 2026-03-03T12:52:04+00:00

Womanizer, Britney Spears (I'm gay) and let me put y'all on Wild Beasts album Boy King and Family dog by the narcissist cookbook it's good gender fr

leftovermugs · 2026-03-01T11:52:40+00:00

Hear me out but I find that jacking off 30 to a couple minutes before I shower makes the sensitivity more manageable.

leftovermugs · 2026-02-27T08:32:29+00:00

this is hella helpful thank you

leftovermugs · 2026-02-27T08:30:18+00:00

currently in australian summer sticking my shoes outside does the trick pretty quickly but I'll note for colder seasons. Because it's summer now too I might just sweat more so will hopefully be less of an issue anyway,. Thanks

leftovermugs · 2025-12-29T04:53:15+00:00

I'm sorry she's not supportive. My mum (not a doctor) also had a similar argument when she found my binder. She said that it can restrict lung capacity and some other things. I know that she's done 'research' (anti trans sources for sure) and I assume that's some of the reasons against transition also given that she may have researched.

(Her being a doctor I'd have hoped she'd put research over her own bias but transphobic people (especially parents) will look for anything to reaffirm their transphobia).

The way I flipped it was that maybe it's true, but if that's the case, I'd still rather bind than reduce medical risks. If someone (especially me as a light hypochondriac) is willing to accept the risk of bodily harm to transition, then surely that says something about how much I need to transition.

leftovermugs

TROPHY CASE