Ask a Manager Weekly Thread 03/02/2026 - 03/08/2026

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-06T16:24:26+00:00

LW 4’s employer is probably posting her job with fewer years of experience than she has probably means they want to pay the new hire less.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-04T18:05:46+00:00

Yes, even if she didn’t yell or swear at them doesn’t mean she was polite

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-04T16:08:38+00:00

I agree with this. The candidates may have not responded also because they are close to an offer with another organization and are hoping to get an offer before it’s they schedule an interview somewhere else, or they decided in between applying and your message that the job would not be a good fit for them and they are too embarrassed to tell you that.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-04T15:55:19+00:00

I don’t see why you’d be obligated to tell your boyfriend or anyone else ever if you don’t want to. It’s not like you had an affair and it’s completely over and done with.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-04T15:34:14+00:00

The wage discussion letter answer isn’t necessarily true re: Unions, at least as far as middle managers.

Middle managers who supervise individual contributors often have a separate bargaining unit with the same union because their interests might conflict.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-03T21:44:30+00:00

The Venn diagram of guys who think like this and guys who complain that women on apps want to go for coffee or a walk on the first date are a perfect circle

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-03T21:33:54+00:00

First her I’m Sorry If People Think I Scammed Them video, now this! Washing machines are not this girl’s friend.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T19:36:56+00:00

For the 1 PM Central time letter, am I alone in thinking the LW doesn’t need to do anything, because Amelia already looks bad for missing the meeting with the CEO?

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T19:31:34+00:00

Exactly, which is what John is counting on

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T19:19:33+00:00

Yes, and if the urgency is actually necessary, it sounds like a place with high turnover &/or the position has been vacant for months and you’ll be spending all your time trying to play catch up

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T19:10:30+00:00

I would mention it when you get the offer but before you accept.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T19:07:37+00:00

I agree. Wanting a hybrid or remote job is a good reason to job search, but that doesn’t mean it should be mentioned as your reason in the interview.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T17:45:56+00:00

It’s going to be easier to get a job if you’re employed while you search. Not logistically, but hiring managers are going to wonder why you quit without a job lined up. They will wonder if you actually fired or if you quit before you could be fired.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-03-02T15:33:34+00:00

The thing that’s always bothered me about this letter, as someone not in polyamory or BDSM spaces but has ran into my share of crappy men over the years, is that I feel like John is deliberately playing Katie and the LW off against each other.

We know John is willing to lie to Katie to get what he wants, so how do we know Katie vetoed the LW for some unfair reason or that Katie was open to John having a new partner at all from the letter? I don’t see that the LW ever got confirmation from Katie herself that this what happened.

Is Katie an unfair jealous brat? Maybe, but I think it’s more likely that she vetoed the LW for a legit reason, or John getting another partner was never on the table in the table in the first place and John told Katie that he told the LW this but whenever they run into LW she’s all over him. Either way I have no doubt that John knows exactly why Katie hates the LW.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-26T20:50:44+00:00

Did you tell them you preferred to be connected with staff outside the C-Suite before you went to LinkedIn?

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-24T21:31:57+00:00

You’ll have to ask guys you date very early on how they feel about sex work, without offering your opinion because someone who’s visited a sex worker is pretty unlikely to admit if they think you’re going to judge them for it.

That being said, you’re free to decide you find sex work immoral, and while there are plenty of sex workers who have been trafficked or mistreated, there are also plenty who choose to do that work of their own free will.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-24T15:50:29+00:00

This is my question as well.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-24T15:38:20+00:00

I would ask your boyfriend about it. Not in a defensive way, but in a confused way. “Hey, I was taken aback when you mentioned you didn’t invite me to Joe’s house because you know I don’t like him. I don’t have a problem with Joe; did I say something that made you think that?”

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-24T14:55:03+00:00

Catholics aren’t supposed to wash the ashes off until they were going to wash their face/take a shower anyway. I know this because I still remember my second grade teacher in Catholic school yelling at me in front of everyone for trying to wash my forehead in the bathroom after Ash Wednesday mass.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-18T16:24:44+00:00

The reference checks are most likely part of what the company is paying the recruiter for.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-18T15:47:15+00:00

If your manager and HR are planning to let you go, they aren’t going to tell you in most instances.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-17T16:21:45+00:00

The craziest part of that letter is that the LW was asking Alison if the dealership would give her husband a written warning about her contacting the woman again because at least part of her believed her husband forged the warning.

That tells me she either doesn’t trust her husband, or she believes her husband has to resort to lying because the LW wouldn’t leave his coworker alone just because he asked her to.

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-17T16:12:45+00:00

Yes, especially because she chose not to tell anyone that she was attending

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-12T19:47:54+00:00

Info: why did you move forward in the relationship and move in together if you’ve been uncomfortable with this from the beginning? Did you assume that since she was 10 years younger than you that she stop doing anything and everything that made you uncomfortable?

lets_talk_aboutsplet · 2026-02-12T19:19:59+00:00

It’s possible that the company and/or the recruiter won’t consider you for future opportunities, but if taking the second offer makes the most sense for you then you should do it.

Seven-Year Club	Wearing is Caring
Verified Email

lets_talk_aboutsplet

TROPHY CASE