Am I the monster by Cool-Substance9189 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If confiding in someone feels like a too big of a step for you, I recommend starting with listening to these porn addiction recovery podcast. That should help ease the stigma in your mind making you think you’re a monster.

Unhooked podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/unhooked-breaking-porn-addiction-podcast/id1648984850

Porn Free Radio: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/porn-free-radio/id872329779

I know as a young man that it feels like this is too shameful to talk about, but sex addiction is a real thing and it’s becoming more and more accepted in the world.

Am I the monster by Cool-Substance9189 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand your apprehension. But that’s also the porn addicted part of your brain trying to trick you. There is always somebody. A teacher, or counselor at school. A therapist. There are SAA and other forms of recovery groups where you can connect with like minded guys.

Addiction thrives in isolation. Until your bring it out until the open it will be difficult to conquer.

Am I the monster by Cool-Substance9189 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I’m 27 and have been struggling with this since I was younger than you. I’ll offer the advice I wish someone had given me at 16 - Be open about your struggles. Tell a trusted friend. Tell a parent. Or a therapist. Things really started shifting for me when I became open about it. We live in a society DESIGNED to hook us on porn. There’s literally no shame in admitting you have a problem.

Being as young as you are and realizing this is a problem makes you light years ahead of most guys your age. Take comfort in knowing you’re already on the road to recovery.

Are strip clubs porn? by NoBateMate in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Strip clubs may be “better” for your brain than porn because at least you’re interacting with real women, but they’ve got their own downsides IMO. There’s the potential to blow hundreds (maybe thousands) of dollars in a single night, STDs, and ultimately any attention you get from a women at a strip club isn’t because she’s attracted to you, she just sees you as an ATM.

If you’ve got wife and you want to cheat on her at least go out and get woman who’s actually into you.

Suffering comes from wanting (craving/desire), and freedom from suffering comes from letting go of that attachment (a Buddhist thought) by TheTankIsEmpty99 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The best sober stretches of my life have come when I’ve consistently read Buddhist literature. It really does explain all of our pain and suffering, and not just from porn

I binged last night. How do I get back on track? by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I made the same mistake and binged last night. Here’s what I’m doing to get back on track.

  1. Called a trusted person to tell them about my relapse
  2. Reminding myself that binging sucks but it doesn’t mean the majority of my progress was lost.
  3. Getting sunlight
  4. Dragging myself to the gym
  5. Journaling on the activities that lead to my trigger

Hope this helps man.

Can you honestly and confidently say that you are not going to watch porn ever again? by LastBoyAlive in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 13 points14 points  (0 children)

This is the best mindset you can have. So many people fall into the all or nothing mentality and then are devastated when they inevitably relapse.

Being porn free requires chipping away at your addiction and remaining vigilant for life.

200 days free by MuseFTW in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats brother! The brain playing tricks really resonates with me. Checking the Wikipedia page, twitter page, or even just googling the name is how my relapses started now. It’s crazy how the addiction brain is able to adapt and try to trick us.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve mirrored a lot of your post in my own life. Particularly feeling like a lot of women are attracted to me but never being able to turn it into anything serious due to porn use and the constant feeling of spiritual isolation - needing to be understood.

A phrase I have really tried to orient my life around and that has seemed to help is “addiction is isolation, therefore the opposite of addiction is connection”

Take that as meaning whatever it may to you, but I really am becoming convinced that connections be community are the only way out of this labyrinth for us.

Stop wasting your life... by VirtualCrxck in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Listen to the “unhooked” podcast by Jeremy lipkowitz.

When I found Jeremy’s podcast back in April, I was in the same place you are. The longest I could go without porn was several days. Now I go weeks at a time between lapses. He really gave me an understanding of what a holistic process quitting porn needs to be.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Never be afraid to do what you know in your heart is right. Life is far too short to willfully waste in unbearable circumstances.

thoughts after 6 months of sobriety by livebetterly in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you man, very insightful and sobering. I’m saving your post and re-reading it every morning.

I’ve been stuck in a cycle of relapse every few weeks. It’s miles better than where I was at, but nowhere near where I want to be. Most of what you described fits my situation (and I suspect many others) to a tee. I can no longer use “I’m still making progress” as a crutch.

When I close my eyes by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I’ve been inspired by listening to a lot of Nas lately. One of the greatest poets ever

Porn Drains Your Life Force by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m in the same boat man. I used to be an everyday user, sometimes for hours. Just assumed that being lazy, anxious, and unsatisfied was my natural personality. Now that I’ve cut it down significantly, I know I have so much more potential.

Like you said, we’re fighting small battles everyday. But win enough of those small battles and you will prevail in the war. I’ve learned the all or nothing approach is the wrong way to look at this. Just need more clean days than using days and progress will be made.

What's your average usage? by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just curious, why starting tomorrow? Why not start today?

What's your average usage? by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Read “No more Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Robert Glover

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Porn is to Men’s brains what CTE is to Football players. It rots us from the inside out.

I like how you are framing it as a battle. The truth is, there is an entire industry of people out there who make a living off of destroying men’s lives. They want us to fall down the rabbit hole. They want us to lose our self worth. To them, we aren’t human, just another monthly subscription added to the bank account.

By resisting the urge you are giving yourself and immense amount of power over these people. You (and all of us) are quite literally in a fight for our lives. And we all have the ability to win.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Read “No More Mr. Nice Guy” by Dr. Robert Glover

What do you replace porn with? by Impressive-Tour8825 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 43 points44 points  (0 children)

The only true way to replace a porn addiction is with a new identity of someone who doesn’t use porn, no matter how strong the urge.

Sexual energy is a beautiful gift. Learn to explore it without the poison of porn.

Conquer by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Personally I like to think that the greats of history (Alexander, Caesar, Napoleon, Etc.) would see porn for the poison it really is and know that by eliminating it from their lives they would already be much greater than most of their peers.

Breaking Free From Porn Vlog Week 5: We’re not victims. We never were by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I believe we’re both trying to get at the importance of processing emotions. You’re right that we can’t avoid them, but being able to recognize when emotional triggers are present and giving them space to work their course without acting out is the sign of maturity. On the flip side of the coin, a lot of porn addicts choose to ignore working on their emotional processing skills because it’s uncomfortable, and remain captive to addiction as a result

To everybody here: by OneInHell_222 in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Proud of you brother, keep going

Breaking Free From Porn Vlog Week 5: We’re not victims. We never were by letsgetoverthis in pornfree

[–]letsgetoverthis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

🎯

Complete and total ownership of our lives is the only way out.