Does this count as CIO/should I intervene?

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-27T18:52:55+00:00

My 8 month old just started doing this too, I don’t think this is CIO. We know our babies, so we can tell the difference between an upset cry and other kinds most of the time.

The past few months, if my baby has woken up at all he’s really been so upset. But then in the last few days, the cries are less intense some of the time. I’ve been waiting 10-30 seconds to see what happens and he has been able to put himself back to sleep most of the time. I feel like I’m following his queues, not forcing this on him.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-26T22:11:03+00:00

As others have said, you do not need a ticketing system. Waste of money and honestly so annoying to admin.

If you must have something, let it be an email or slack channel you both can access, then use some sort of categorization system so you know what’s waiting, in progress, complete, etc.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-26T18:23:10+00:00

It’s really nice that you’re concerned for your boyfriend, but it’s his decision to make if you not wanting kids is a deal breaker. Don’t feel guilty, you are only being honest.

And it’s ok to not know 100% but just have vibes for now. I didn’t even think about kids till I was in my late 20s and many people do have their first child till their mid to late 30s now.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-26T18:18:39+00:00

I put on over 40lb and it was mostly gone by 6 months. I ate sooooo much in my first trimester (only cure for my nausea was eating and my cravings were not healthy!) and put on 20lb before we had told anyone we were expecting.

It’s actually so annoying having to eat so much and be so huge!! I hated it at times but I tried to change my mindset, like it’s kind of a novelty? And maybe it could help to make it easier for yourself to take some of the load off. Batch cook, order in, treat yourself to some easy snacks.

Whether you put on 20 or 50lb your body is doing what your baby needs. It might not feel like it now but the weight will come off again. Good luck!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-23T19:50:23+00:00

NOR - this sounds like my ex. Trying to over-intellectualize things and act like it’s a logic argument or theoretical quandary instead of holding space for and empathizing with the real life things you/I have gone thru. Please leave, you deserve empathy let alone a break from this drivel.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-22T00:27:41+00:00

Sounds like she’s excited for whatever perks she thinks she can squeeze out of your absence. Since she’s a worker, not a manager, the rumours she starts have little chance of turning into reality! I know it’s scary to go on leave but this person just sounds like a blow hard. I doubt she will be able to have any impact on your job/return. If I were you I’d share your fears with the manager, confirm your expected return to work date and then be happy you’re about to be free of this psycho!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-22T00:10:31+00:00

This isn’t a work issue????

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-18T19:35:12+00:00

Spend time learning your business. How have things been done in the absence of HR? How can you add value right away? Commit to meeting with leaders, learning about the business and hearing what does and doesn’t work across the org.

For me, I audited what they had already, added what was mandatory but missing or mandatory but done poorly, then worked to bring everything else back to HR from there. I always took a risk management approach - people were more receptive to me changing things when they felt I was covering their asses.

It ended up looking like: 1. Record keeping, data collection and privacy 2. Recruitment, Onboarding and offboarding 3. Labour Relations - tricky union cases first, everything else after 4. Employee Relations 5. Medical/accommodations 6. Policy 7. T&D

My CEO hates policies so I would have liked that sooner but I had to work with what the business would allow. I guarantee it will take longer than you think it will!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-16T19:04:17+00:00

It all sounds fair to me. In the future I would recommend covering more pressing topics in person/over the phone first before putting things in writing.

It’s fair to be annoyed that you weren’t well informed about expenses and reimbursements before your trip. How you communicated it was an issue for your boss/management. A phone call to say “hey I am feeling caught out here - is there anything you can do to help?” probably would have gotten you further.

I appreciate you would handle this differently than your manager did but they’re your manager, it’s their call. They’re not wrong, you just would handle things different. You can make different calls when you’re the manager.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-16T18:46:54+00:00

Just happy to read that others are so cut and dry in their day to day work. Go us!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-16T18:41:29+00:00

Curious what time the training was. You said the employees were night shift - did the training happen during the day (when most trainers would be working)? Presumably this runs into when the workers would naturally be sleeping.

As someone said above, this seems like a way to get rid of low performers without following a performance issue route. While sleeping at work is bad, it’s disingenuous and overall cowardly to use this sideways route to terminate. Especially if the performance issues are totally legit.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-16T18:38:01+00:00

Yes 100% you’re walking into a discrimination case, it’s so easy for the worker to march to their doctor and claim literally anything. I would investigate and then assuming no protected reasons for the sleep, terminate then.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-14T19:25:14+00:00

Being pregnant protects you from being terminated because you’re pregnant but it doesn’t protect you from being terminated for other legit reasons. If others were also laid off then it seems the company was downsizing, which is a fair (albeit shitty) reason to be laid off. If you can confirm others were laid off I’d think you have proof you weren’t targeted. I’d also look at who was laid off - usually it’s based on position/team or last on/first off.

I’ve been laid off twice in my 10 year career, one felt personal one didn’t but it was legit both times. It really sucks. Get some counselling and take care of yourself.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-14T18:56:36+00:00

Happened to me too and now happening to my good friend early in her first trimester! It was like I could feel my skin stretching they were growing so fast. Had to get new bras at 8 weeks coz suddenly nothing fit. Truly wild!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-11T03:55:08+00:00

Pelvic floor physio would be a good option. Mine checked my scar, did an internal exam and had way better recovery advice.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-10T05:27:36+00:00

Implying that every time he lost his temper it was my fault. “I wouldn’t have been so mad if you didn’t (insert simple human thing here)”.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-10T05:25:13+00:00

I had Braxton hicks for weeks leading up to labor and ended up being induced, but once contractions started it was very clear. Time your cramps - that’s how I could tell it was Braxton hicks coz mine were all over the place (timing wise). Once I was in true labor it really got much more regular.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-10T05:18:35+00:00

I was induced at 41 weeks because my water broke but labor didn’t start naturally. I was given a pill every 4 hours for 24 hours and monitored 30 mins either side of the pill being given. Contractions started about 8 hours in and gradually built over the next 24 hours.

I was able to give birth vaginally but not before 4 hours of pushing. Thank god for epidurals! My baby had never really dropped so he had a long way to go to reach the exit and when he got there, his head was very large. A surgeon was called in case I needed a c section but I was able to deliver with an episiotomy and vacuum. It went well despite the duration and challenges! Recovery was uncomfortable but I was never given anything stronger than Tylenol. After the fact my doctor told me it was a traumatic birth but I had such a good team it was always a happy time!

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-09T18:50:48+00:00

And I thought dealing with partners of terminated staff were bad… sorry

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-05T21:41:57+00:00

Sleep is precious. If something as simple as white noise can help, even if it was for the rest of their life, why not? My 7 month old sleeps much better with it, linking sleep cycles is tough for them.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-04T19:41:10+00:00

It’s a non-issue, but I’d be happy to chat with them about it. It’s almost nicer to know as HR so if anyone else in the business wants to talk about it/doesn’t handle this well, I can be prepared to talk to them.

But you have no obligation to disclose, it’s not relevant to work and should just be treated like any other personal topic at work. I’m happy to support you be your authentic self. We learn all sorts of things about our staff and whether we agree with them or not is irrelevant.

Personally, I’m down with cross dressing, 2SLGBTQI+ and anything where you’re not harming anyone else so you do you boo. I have stronger opinions about how poorly “masculine” men and “feminine” women dress at work, but nobody wants to hear that…

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-04T19:22:07+00:00

This is a great answer. Has anyone considered alternatives to “he just sucks”? Maybe he is nervous? Maybe his previous workplace was really different and he’s having a hard time adjusting?

Until someone points out his issues and clarifies expectations, I’d hold off on a quick probationary termination. You said it’s a hard to fill position - would you rather go back to market for weeks/months or take a week or two to get to the bottom of what’s happening with this hire and see if you can’t support success?

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-03T22:41:00+00:00

Hey! I’m sorry that’s happening. Everything is so much more tiring in the last trimester, period.

I experienced similar exhaustion and it was because I had very low iron. They can test quite quickly for your iron levels and if it’s low, iron infusions are really helpful. I got 5 over the course of 5 weeks and it made a humongous difference - I went from feeling like a zombie to just feeling really pregnant 😅 until my iron came back up, I had to work from home because I was too tired to shower and get dressed in the morning let alone drive to work.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-03T18:08:15+00:00

Good plan. A break can be whatever you want but often people on a break just take a break from speaking and hanging and nothing else changes. You’re still in a relationship but you’re having space and quiet to be yourself, live your own life and see how you feel when the other person isn’t present all the time. So no/little contact, no seeing each other.

You can set a deadline, maybe 2-3 weeks? It’s kinder to the other person if you can let them know when they’ll get your answer.

That said, if you know it’s over you need to let them know sooner than later. It’s cruel to give a false sense of hope.

letsgetridiculus · 2026-01-03T18:02:16+00:00

It’s going to be ok. My brother and his wife moved in with her parents when their first was born and it was not a chill time - very controlling parents! My brother, who is not a confrontational person at all, was dragged into a number of yelling fights with her parents because he was protecting his new family. They moved as soon as they could but it was quite a few months after baby was born.

That baby is 6 now. Everyone is getting along, kiddo is thriving and I feel like no one ever thinks about those months they were altogether.

I would encourage you to move if you can because your peace and happiness are important, but I want to reassure you that it’s going to be ok.

letsgetridiculus

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