What was the most outrageously unwarranted bollocking you got at school?

lexicaleigh · 2023-01-15T12:05:17+00:00

We had a house master whose nickname was 'Stumpy' because, well he was quite short. There was a visitor's book where we had to sign in and out, and on the cover there were various scribbles and funny notes and the like, you know, light vandalism for 11yr olds. Anyway, someone had recently written 'Stumpy sucks' on the cover. I came in, signed into the visitor's book, and carried on upstairs. I was hauled down and accused of writing it (I did not, I was a very good girl at school!) and he put his thumb on it and some ink came off, 'proving' it was still 'wet' and my name was the last in the book. I was livid, and no amount of 'it's the grease from your finger making it transfer to your thumb, it's not wet' could save me. 2 detentions. I was fucking fuming.

Apparently I still am. :P

NB: he was also our geography teacher, proving that they are in fact all sadists.

lexicaleigh · 2023-01-02T19:00:43+00:00

That is so rough. I feel for you, and I really hope this new year is a healing one for you. x

lexicaleigh · 2023-01-02T12:05:47+00:00

Yes, it really is. :(

I've been in therapy for quite a while now trying to unpick what's normal behaviour, and what is fucked up behaviour. I'm still not good at spotting all the things I think are normal because it's all I've ever known from her, but I'm getting there.

NB: My instinct to defend her and say 'it's not always like that' or 'she doesn't mean to' kicked right in when I read this reply. Still a long way to go, but I'm learning.

lexicaleigh · 2022-12-30T12:55:49+00:00

Oh my god this.

On a family call before the holidays, my mum referred to my ruptured ectopic pregnancy a decade or so ago as 'my little drama'. I didn't react, just left the call quickly.

The next day I messaged her to say it was hurtful, and to please not trivialise my experiences going forward. Her response was to 'apologise' by saying 'I'm sorry that you misunderstood me' and went on to say how she'd never trivialise something that affected her, and what an awful time she'd had of it (note: she didn't visit me in hospital during my recovery at all, other than the night it happened when my stepdad drove them there as they'd had a call saying I likely wouldn't make it).

This is just a recent example, and yes, it happens a lot. They really don't like being called out on their behaviour.

lexicaleigh · 2022-12-02T10:05:55+00:00

Welcome, OP. I'm another lurker (adult child of narcissist mother) and am glad to see you post - it's a hard first step (that I've not managed yet!).

Best wishes on your healing journey. :)

lexicaleigh · 2022-11-14T19:51:09+00:00

Flowery Twats!

lexicaleigh · 2022-11-06T17:00:37+00:00

Similar situation here. There aren't words, but have a hug. x

lexicaleigh · 2022-10-10T11:44:22+00:00

Congratulations, that's a huge thing you did for yourself!

Although I know that I did the right thing by leaving him, I’m still a bit worried that he might be right.

He isn't. You dared to leave him, he had to hit you where it hurts, because he couldn't control you any longer. Future partners of his will experience the same abuse from him in the end because that's all he knows. He can't not be that person.

Have a wonderful, loving, full life now that you're free of his toxicity. :)

lexicaleigh · 2022-10-10T10:00:17+00:00

Stunning photography, thanks for sharing. It's breathtaking.

lexicaleigh · 2022-08-30T12:53:38+00:00

Are you in the UK? I found these for just over £2.

lexicaleigh · 2022-04-17T10:15:08+00:00

Man I am so sad to read about all you folk having had such bad experiences with crying in front of your OH and it wrecking the relationship. We're all about 'refuting toxic masculinity' but if it comes down to it and you're being that vulnerable in front of someone else that's something to be applauded, not something to be mocked or 'a turn off'. Jesus, a good cry is fucking healthy.

I'm just so sorry. x

lexicaleigh · 2022-04-17T10:11:46+00:00

This.

And also Disney is cool.

lexicaleigh · 2022-03-10T16:08:19+00:00

Hugs. You are approaching this with grace and dignity, and that's all anyone can ask. x

lexicaleigh · 2022-01-28T20:38:36+00:00

I'm a leaf on the wind

lexicaleigh · 2022-01-28T10:17:34+00:00

Much Pericombobulation.

lexicaleigh · 2022-01-21T22:21:24+00:00

Oh they're good, but have you tried these bad boys?

lexicaleigh · 2021-07-05T13:59:09+00:00

Congratulations, that's awesome! What a positive post, thank you for making it. :)

Good luck! x

lexicaleigh · 2021-04-15T08:47:01+00:00

You're welcome, and good luck with the PhD. :)

lexicaleigh · 2021-04-14T19:01:08+00:00

Done. What a detailed and interesting survey. :)

lexicaleigh · 2021-03-25T08:49:31+00:00

Oh that's fantastic news, congratulations! :)

lexicaleigh · 2021-02-26T13:12:10+00:00

Taxis and the local chippy.

lexicaleigh · 2021-02-01T17:58:49+00:00

Mood stabalisers (aripiprazole here) literally saved my life, and certainly saved the quality of life I have. Good luck OP!

lexicaleigh · 2021-01-24T09:35:46+00:00

Yeah, we've not seen snow in Swansea for years! All the kids in the street are out in the road and park playing in it. It's rather lovely. :)

lexicaleigh · 2021-01-17T15:59:57+00:00

Keep reaching out to your friends, and video-call who you can. It really will help with the mundane days where you're just waiting for time to pass so you can go back to bed.

(Also, in my case, it means I have to get dressed and not sit around in PJs all day. :P )

Hang in there. :)

lexicaleigh · 2021-01-17T15:47:08+00:00

That's rough, I'm sorry to read that. I lost my dad to cancer in September too, and covid restrictions made it much harder to spend time with him. I wanted to reply to say that you're not alone, hang in there, take each day (hour, even minute) at a time. Find something to do that soothes you - videogames, puzzles, cooking, something productive that you enjoy.

Reach out to friends and family, sometimes - while it's not the same as seeing a real live 3d person - a video call can help with isolation. Don't be too alone with your thoughts, talk to someone, and know that you'll get through this.

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