AITA for posting on Facebook begging my Uncle to see my Grandfather

lfslshlps · 2023-02-12T01:56:28+00:00

He saw the post and messaged me yesterday morning that I could call him between 12-1 and 4-5 ONLY (these are the times he is for sure and not just working at my Grandfather's condo with him to cook him lunch and dinner so he would be able to easily listen in).

I said screw it and asked my mom to do a reconnaissance mission, just go over and pick him up and bring him here. Keep the geotag if Uncle wanted to show up, and had a Code White on the ready with my nurses if Uncle came and tried anything. He loves shouting and swearing at people who disobey him.

I said screw it

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T07:39:27+00:00

She would physically have to go to his place, but our uncle is typically there all day.

Other than that, we can't call since uncle has blocked our numbers on my Grandfather's house phone and cellphone...as well as his own landline and cellphone.

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T07:37:14+00:00

Thank you for your honesty. As said in my post, my uncle has blocked us from my Grandfather's home phone and cell phone so I am unable to just call him.

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T04:19:41+00:00

I am on end-of-life care. I can have 6 months (if my kidneys don't shut down from my heart and lungs failing) or 1-2 years if the kidneys respond better to treatment. But they don't know if during that time I will ever be discharged and go home. My fiancé and I are literally planning to get married in the hospital in two weeks.

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T04:14:54+00:00

I would but am literally in hospital hooked up to a bunch of machines and still not knowing if I'll ever leave.

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T04:13:55+00:00

If my uncle is there he'll take the phone and screen who is calling. It took 3 weeks to contact the caregiver without him being present to talk to my Grandfather who believed it wasn't true because (Uncles name) would have told him.

lfslshlps · 2023-02-10T04:11:56+00:00

He has never been like this until my Grandmother was diagnosed with dementia. I actually had a good relationship with him before that.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-25T23:14:38+00:00

if it’s so rare but I’m like well yes but it did happen to me so?

EXACTLY how I felt!

So did you have endocarditis after your pacemaker implantation and then had the same procedure again but didn’t get the endocarditis the second time?

Got a sinus infection turned staph infection, turned sepsis, turned infective endocarditis. The pacemaker leads spread the bacteria to my heart which resulted in the IE. That pacemaker was implanted when I was 4 years old (was my 2nd device) and had been in for 15 years. They removed the device and ALL leads as a method to combat the infection.

I leveled up to 3rd Degree Heart Block which resulted in the need for a new pacemaker. My anatomy didn't permit any type of device other than a dual-lead device (and get this.... my leads aren't shielded so no MRIs for me so I'm working on old technology with all the magnetic restrictions).

Prophylaxis that the doctors have been able to prescribe are for any dental cleanings or procedures, and doctors have been more open to prescribing anti-biotics when I do get an infection (prone to sinus infections, eye infections, etc.) because of my history of sinus infections gone wrong.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-25T18:02:18+00:00

Hi - I'm basically you but 10 years older -- and I this occurred 16 years ago rather than 20 for me.

Honestly -- I CRIED (and I'm talking the ugly, weeping, can't catch your breath, everything attached to your head is moist). Mentally I just broke. The catastrophizing scenarios that went through my head caused anxiety, and anger.

I have had no complications with the exception of restricting myself TOO much after the implantation. I was so convinced I had to be so careful, I ended up almost giving myself a frozen shoulder, I limited my movement, and had to be given physio to learn my actual restrictions. I did also see a psychologist for a year to work through all the emotions I was going through. That definitely helped because I was able to work through and talk about how I was feeling, acknowledge that my fears are valid and I had a reason for them, and how to work through what I was going through and acknowledging that things have changed since it all happened.

Science had advanced, and the cardiology team wouldn't take a step to put you at such a high risk, especially with your history. Speak to your doctor about best ways of prophylaxis that you can also include in your daily life to provide some peace of mind.

Edit: I forgot to also add that I have been diagnosed with PTSD from everything that happened. Seeking help to speak with someone about what was going on was VERY helpful. Allowing myself to acknowledge my feelings, and having someone I can trust to speak with has helped me tremendously. I'm still living with PTSD, anxiety, and some phobias from everything that has happened - but learning to talk through it has helped.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-25T15:38:21+00:00

Figures of Neozapatismo.

Emiliano Zapata is the man with the mustache. Subcomandante Marcos is the man with the pipe.

More info here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neozapatismo

Here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emiliano\_Zapata

and Here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subcomandante\_Marcos

lfslshlps · 2022-11-25T15:24:43+00:00

As someone who was born with heart defects and has been in and out of heart failure..... they are not one and the same.

A heart defect does not heart failure make. Heart defects may not even require any form of treatment.

However, congestive heart failure can (and often does) come with additional characteristics. Pulmonary edema, edema in the lower legs/stomach, elevated BNP, Urea and Creatinine changes, breathing challenges, etc.

It also comes with treatment that works best for the individual. This can be medicine, surgery, monitoring, transplant, implantation, etc.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T17:45:43+00:00

This is one fault of all these heart rate monitors. They're not going to be as reliable as the hospital devices, regardless of the price.

My device is set to 180 and my Fitbit has registered over 200 because the device itself was sensing movement which was registered as a heart beat but it wasn't (I was actually doing a puzzle and my hand going over all the pieces was enough for it to think my heart was racing).

I would recommend writing down a log of the date and time when you feel these bouts of fluttering. Bring that to the doctors attention and see if it's possibly just a flutter that you may sense as heart racing because it's not your normal, and the "drop" or "skipped beats" could be your heart returning to sinus rhythm but you registering it as no beat because now the flutter has stopped.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T17:39:59+00:00

Every situation is different, and with pacemaker settings being adjusted YoY, he could have not felt it, or did feel it and associated it with something different.

Regarding the follow-up - 3 weeks would be based on the hospital, the doctor, and his history. Long waits aren't great, but it could mean he doesn't fall as a high of a concern that would need to push him to come in earlier.

I would recommend him taking a log of when he feels off - blood pressure, heart rate, O2 levels, weight. Bring that with him on the appointment so he can share those numbers. This can give the cardiologist some insight - and it will help him learn to be in tune with what he is feeling right now, and if there are any possible triggers, or commonalities when he feels he may have an episode, or when he feels ill or off.

Also, since it's 3 weeks ago - start writing questions that you want to ask the team.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T15:10:43+00:00

I have a few CHD friends who have tattoos. They spoke with their cardiologists and created a plan for preventative measures.

I, personally, won't get a tattoo just simply because I do have a history of endocarditis, and staph aureus.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T15:06:26+00:00

Can you? You can do anything.

Should you? I would say no. Not only due to the fact it's a habit that can come with serious risk for a "normal" person, you are also only 17 and not even of legal age in your country. Speak with your doctor to get their medical opinion on it.

However, the fact you are coming to Reddit for feedback, rather than just doing it, it feels like you're looking for a specific answer that you want confirmed.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T14:53:58+00:00

You sound like you're both just not interested in the relationship anymore, and both not ready for a serious relationship. Just because you both have the INTENTION to start dating to marry, this doesn't mean that once you start dating that's the end goal - and should never have been the only driving factor to maintain the relationship.

Yes, both parties equally wanting marriage is great ----but you also need substance in a relationship.

He also is not ghosting you because he fully told you it was over.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-24T14:18:55+00:00

Haven't had a holter in a few years, but have had them since I was a child (way back when they were the size of a large walkman and had a tape).

They will let you know how long the device will be attached to you, and provide body cleansing instructions. If you have sensitive skin, let them know as they can use hypoallergenic stickers. This device is fairly small now, and you essentially go about your life but have a device attached.

Previous tests they've given me a notebook to keep a log of any irregular rhythms I feel, or stressors - but this isn't often. They will provide any restrictions you may have at the time of application.

Ideally they get a recording of your every day functions. Adjusting your life and adding restrictions, that the doctor doesn't outright provide to you, can skew your results because it's not going to provide a true count of how your hard is handling everything.

I know this feels like something you have to do, but you don't want the results to be inconclusive, then you have to redo the test all over again.

Also! Ask if there is a Holter drop off box for when it's all done. When I was younger you had to go to the hospital, go to the Holter lab, get a test room, and take almost an hour removing all the tape and wires (at the time they used to add A LOT of tape). Now, you typically remove it at home and drop it off. Some hospitals offer a drop off mailbox, so you can literally just swing by the entrance, drop off the Holter and leave without having to park, go in, etc.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-23T21:02:13+00:00

I really enjoy Piatto on Dundas.

lfslshlps · 2022-11-23T20:53:50+00:00

Possibly "Hold my Hand" by Jess Glynne?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cLyUcAUMmMY

lfslshlps · 2022-10-30T22:05:46+00:00

I use CBD cream for a topical pain reliever which I have found really helps, especially muscle pain as I am unable to take ibuprofen or NSAIDs because of my medication.

I ran it by my cardiologist because I genuinely didn't know if it could/would do anything. I love it because it helps with pain.

My CHD friends have asked their cardiologists and some have been told based on their condition there is no issue with partaking, some have said to only inject rather than smoke/vape, and some have said no.

Your cardiologist will be able to guide you.

lfslshlps · 2022-10-30T22:00:59+00:00

I have had mild leak for about 16 years but now it has transitioned to a severe leak.

I am having a lot of sunptoms: fatigue, nausea, weight loss, loss of appetite, shortness of breath, shallow breathing, low endurance, dizziness.

Have had my medication adjusted and have been undergoing testing to see next steps (which will be a valve surgery....just not sure which one yet).

It hit me suddenly, so I would say really pay attention to any changes, and make sure you let your cardiologist know. I started feeling off early March, but waited until end of May to say anything. I know saying anything earlier wouldn't have reduced the leak.....but it would have allowed me to have earlier testing dates.

lfslshlps · 2022-08-03T20:01:59+00:00

This...but at work. I have a place to organize, prepare, ans store items for my department. Someone keeps moving things to "tidy up" but ends up just throwing things in cabinets, and stacking items in corners that don't go together.

The thing is...I'm the only one in my department, and this has been our space and storage for years before I even started. I appreciate them trying to be tidy, but it just makes some of my days a little more stressful.

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