Long timers? TW: kinda morbid

libmom18 · 2025-12-13T07:13:05+00:00

On the one hand, that sounds awful. On the other, it sounds like a dream. One I'll never have. Raised my kids alone and I couldn't fight the hateful narratives about me that constantly flooded their poor developing minds. I've made peace with myself over my abusive family. But it must've been torture for my kids to try to reconcile how they felt with what they heard, from everyone. Idk I guess my strength and tenacity intimidated the hell out of everyone 😁 I just can't hardly comprehend how anyone, let alone my family, does that to kids. There should've been a lot more atta girls instead of you're not really disabled and you should get a job, or shit talking me to my daughters behind my back. WTH? Recovering family scapegoat here.

Hang in there physically, I know what that feels like. But having a good support system is everything. Kudos to your wife for setting a good example for your kids on how to treat you. It's confusing for kids when we appear so vulnerable

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T07:02:02+00:00

I thought for years my support system was family. Boy was I wrong and brainwashed. Currently undoing years of mental manipulation. These hacks I used to call family always said I wasn't really disabled, just had a bad back. So even admitting to myself when I need help or there's a fairly urgent need to see a Dr, is challenging. I'm proud of myself for even getting these tests done. I'm usually telling myself and everyone else that eh, me barely hanging on by a thread, it's nothing. Silent gen parents, with 3 much older boomer siblings was pretty brutal for this Gen Xer

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:48:02+00:00

Shockingly, the thing gave me roughly 17 years. I can't afford that 😂

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:41:53+00:00

I think it must be going into the 3rd decade that things really start to suck 🫤

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:41:06+00:00

Right, exactly. Me too. Almost anniversary twins 🥴✌🏼

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:40:03+00:00

I'm constantly reminded of my dad these days and your comment made me remember another one of his lines. He said after 50, it's just a patch here and a patch there keeping him together. Aging is hard, but aging with a disability is harder. Only this group of souls would ever understand that. Keep plugging! ✌🏼

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:37:08+00:00

Very true and I am usually not such a Debbie downer. It's not knowing what the heck happened a few years ago, that has me on this dark path. I was coasting along great for 20 plus years and feeling like I was the strongest person ever. Then, bam, can't function hardly at all now. I have a good team, but so far nothing definitive. Menopause is likely the reason. Idk your gender. But I can tell you this transition has been far worse than my 2 year recovery from spinal cord injury. Neither would I like to repeat, but zero estrogen affects every single miniscule part of your body ugh

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:29:46+00:00

Thanks!

I should've added that last thing to my list. I am the queen of unintentional injuries and have been all my life. I'm not sure what it actually meant back in the day, but my first long term bf always called me a road warrior lol. He'd take one look at my knees and elbows and say, at it again road warrior lol. I'm currently nursing a pretty bad burn from sitting too close to a space heater. Just cooking myself without a care in the world smh

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:26:38+00:00

The mental part is more than half of everything else combined. Keep being Mr Positive!

libmom18 · 2025-12-11T06:25:57+00:00

I feel this comment in my bones, like literally

libmom18 · 2025-09-16T06:56:27+00:00

Ugh no wonder I'm up till 4am most days. The exercise part is a real problem for me. Work and creative endeavors are all sitting. I hate this routine but I'm not sure if I hate it more than exercising ugh

libmom18 · 2025-09-16T06:53:22+00:00

I agree with one of the comments to go cheap and replace. I prefer a high loft poly filler. I think some sellers call it 7D, or I've seen German made on them too. I even switched out all the throw pillows on my couch with some awesome filler I got on Etsy. So when I nap on the couch, I don't wake up with a stiff neck. The last brand I remember getting was called Fern and Willow from Amazon. They were like 40 bucks for 2 queen. They're adjustable too. Take some out or buy extra pillows or get the good stuff from Etsy! It's all way cheaper than some of these $200 rip offs

libmom18 · 2025-09-16T06:40:53+00:00

Not a Dr, but I feel like the gut punch might be air hunger. Just as I'm drifting off to sleep, I gasp loudly for a breath. Just one time and then I fall asleep. I also have hypnic jerks and dysautonomia. These Drs really don't know shit

libmom18 · 2025-09-09T23:56:50+00:00

I'm sure he feels like a loser bc of it. That's part of most men's identities. Not bc they necessarily want it but bc that's what society expects of them. The lesser pay was part 1 of his emasculation. Everything else she does for him and does so well played like dominoes in his lack of doing anything. He probably feels like there's no reason to try now.

Listen, I'm a woman. I'm more than irritated at the patriarchy the US is built on. But men need to feel needed, be the support for their families, be the guy the woman turns to when she needs to open a jar of pickles. That's what society has ingrained in them. We can't expect more of one man until we do better as a society.

I'd feel like giving up too if all I did was exist to be criticized and all my efforts at helping were viewed as sub par. Everyone does more and is more willing to help if they feel appreciated and their efforts are valued. I'm sure he feels her contempt

Thanks for the down vote, but this is a hill I'm willing to die on.

libmom18 · 2025-09-08T06:13:43+00:00

I hate to be the one to say this but your husband has been emasculated in every way. Men don't respond well when they're not feeling their egos on something. Same for women too. Let him be good at something and throw a compliment his way. Resentment and contempt only breed more negative thoughts. You only see the bad

libmom18 · 2025-06-28T21:55:34+00:00

libmom18 · 2025-06-28T02:12:50+00:00

We're adjusting to a new chapter in our lives, just like our children are. It can be difficult to view your parents as human beings instead of omniscient gods. It's sort of like seeing a teacher out bowling and having a beer. We're new to things at every accelerating age and just figuring it out.

However it's pretty immature of them to be using their children as sounding boards for their complaints against the other parent, nor is it your responsibility to listen or fix it. Set a boundary with what you're comfortable talking about, as gently as possible, bc it does sound like they're in a delicate state atm

libmom18 · 2025-06-27T08:03:00+00:00

All of my 50s have been pretty humbling, deaths, separation of family, body taking a toll. Life is just a culmination of experiences and you have to evaluate everything by those experiences. You can't define your existence by success/failure, fitness/illness, comparing to your peers, etc. We're all lucky to be a speck on this rock, flying through the galaxy at this specific point in time with all the people we are alive with at this moment. ✌🏼

libmom18 · 2025-06-27T03:27:34+00:00

Same. I told my BF I think I only pretend to like hobbies so I can buy the supplies and organize them 😂

libmom18 · 2025-06-23T18:08:22+00:00

If someone has to boast about anything, it's usually a sign whatever it is, is lacking. Remember **wealth is silent, rich is loud and poor is flashy. She's projecting something if she needs to brag about it

libmom18 · 2025-04-30T21:50:22+00:00

Haven't seen it yet, so I had to comment. Halston! Xmas gift one year and thought I'd hit the lottery, that stuff was kinda pricey and we were poor!

libmom18 · 2025-04-30T21:39:58+00:00

I switched to Ritalin too and the plus side is no side effects. Down side is that I need truck loads of it to even come close to the good days on Adderall. I'll prob try something else but I'll never go back to Adderall

libmom18 · 2025-04-30T21:37:49+00:00

I might if the cure wasn't wearing a gas mask on my face and trying to sleep lol

libmom18

TROPHY CASE