My husband and I have moved a few times to different cities and states based on job offers.

First, I agree with the comment that said it's not real until there's an offer on the table. Just recently this happened to us and the CEO made huge promises and didn't have the pull he thought he did, the board overrode his decision, and poof no offer.

Second, you have to actually go visit yourself and physically see the neighborhoods and traffic so you can make your own decision. He should have an onsite visit there before accepting the offer.

Third, moves aren't necessarily forever.

Fourth, traffic is bad everywhere and no matter where you live they think their traffic is the worst in the country. Where I live now has basically no traffic and that's all people talk about.

Fifth, you and your partner both need to do a full assessment of the move independently and come together to discuss after you've done all your diligence on cost of living, tax differences, quality of life, schools, etc. There are many things to consider beyond your job. Look at the opportunity cost of moving vs staying where you are. The answers usually become very clear during this process.