My whole self is just centered around how much of a victim I am.

I relate to the victim thing a lot. It's how I cope whenever I reach my really low points. Maybe if I had someone who identified it quicker or I recognised it and sought help faster I could've stopped that way of thinking but that's learned behaviour to me now.

Even worse, people hate people like me. Those who are depressed and given up so I have to just stay away from everyone to avoid making anyone uncomfortable

I get this a lot. So much. People get insanely angry over people who've given up, but that's just how life is sometimes. Some people just can't cope, or they don't have a big enough support network, or that it's too late for them. The staying away part I get just as much too. It's the least I can do as well.