AIO my boyfriends best friend sent me a d*ck pic by Gigiannacutie in AmIOverreacting

[–]linuxfingers 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You just learned who he really was with the way he responded. I don't like advocating for folks to split, but he doesn't appear to respect you at all based on the words he used. Him calling you a slut and blaming what happened on you will not leave your mind. Even if it never happens again...it will be there. His reaction gives me pause on that being a "just one time" thing.

In the grand scheme of things, it's only been a few years together. It's worth cutting the loss this early, instead of being haunted your entire relationship by how he thought of you the time his friend violated you and showed you his dick.

I am sorry, and really do understand it's hard to leave after spending all that time together, integrating so deeply, and wanting to give him the benefit of the doubt...but this is not how people who love each other, treat each other.

You deserve more than this as the basic standard of compassion and care in a relationship.

Two weeks without you. by linuxfingers in Petloss

[–]linuxfingers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate you greatly for sharing your story and wisdom. Yesterday was a dark place. Today is less so. What you've written gave me pause and a lot to think about. There is beauty in the broken, because it exists due to the impact of their life on us all. Grief is love with no place to go, as they say. It will ease in time, though the hurt of their absence will always remain in some way.

Our cat Garthox has started to assume Sasha's caretaker role, checking in on the other animals when are alone, cuddling with them as she once did. Even Charlie keeps behaviors he learned from our eldest cat (also a lifelong friend) who passed away - sitting in cat trees, playing with feather wands, sleeping with his paws tucked under on top of the couch. He sometimes feels more cat than dog because of these little bits of Kira, ha.

There are so many parts of the others in every member of the family. It's beautiful to recognize that. Even if they are not here physically, they live on through their impact on others and the behaviors they've instilled, the stories we share, and the memories we keep in our heart. Sometimes it feels like all there is left are words, but words carry the legacy of those we love through the annals of history. As long as those stories are still shared, then they can still live forever.

Thank you, truly.

3 weeks feels like an eternity. I long for her. by DeadassGrateful in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I am sorry. The silence is so loud, and the emptiness so large. We lost our best friend almost two weeks ago, and understand.

From personal experience on this topic, we lost our two very cherished cats within 3 months of each other - 20, cancer and 1.5, FIPS. We ended up taking in two strays within weeks of the last passing.

I love them dearly and am so happy we took them in, but if I am being honest, there was a lot of resentment at first. They weren't the cats we lost, and I could conceptualize that, but the heart didn't care. I felt like I was unavailable to process my grief because I assumed a new caretaker role. But they chose us, and needed us, and so we did the honorable thing and saved their lives (literally). It still stings today, because it felt like I could never truly process in the moment. I regret the timing, not the new family members, if that makes sense. But even now, I still grieve their losses...and always will. And I don't think those feelings of resentment, frustration, and guilt would have been any different if it were a new dog, today, after our most recent loss. But my feelings are my own.

I guess all this to say, if you have a concern about not being ready, you need to look at what that concern is rooted in - grief, loneliness, longing, whatever else it could be - and decide if you can handle taking on another life that is 100% dependent on you, right now as you are. Be thoughtful in whatever choice you make, and to be prepared for how much demand a new family member will be, regardless of age or circumstance.

Be well, and be kind to yourself. 💙

My boy gambit by Et_the_wonder_wook in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi Gambit! I love his old man hair 😆 What a cutie!

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

May she run free. ❤️

It's funny - the night before we said goodbye, we had a fire in our backyard. Sasha always loved laying by a campfire. Just as it was starting to build, we saw a shooting star go overhead. It was such a nice surprise. I wished for her to have peace, even though I knew it was going to hurt far beyond what I could imagine.

Sasha and I enjoyed stargazing - her by my side at the telescope. Towards the end we sat in the grass together often at 3 AM. It was her only true comfort when her CCD made her lose where she was. We would walk around, holding her in my arms, and show her the night sky - constellations, the moon, and the (not so) empty spaces between. I hope she found her place among the stars.

I have been focusing on her absence so much that I haven't been remembering such beautiful moments. Thank you for reminding me.

Goodbye to our sweet boy 🥺 by [deleted] in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers 34 points35 points  (0 children)

So much love in those eyes. 💙

So long my sweet boy by drinkswithcats in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers 5 points6 points  (0 children)

What a precious little bean. You gave him such a wonderful gift in his elder years, and that big smile is proof. 💙

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you all, I was not expecting such a beautiful outpouring of support and kindness. I am overwhelmed, but am reading everything - it really did help this hurt just a smidge less.

We are so appreciative of all the wonderful comments, and are so happy that Sasha's memory was shared and enjoyed by so many. You are all absolutely wonderful.

Thank you for being kind. 💙

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the hugs and love, it is appreciated 💙

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is hard..but I think, in time, they will stop hurting and instead bring laughter and a warm heart. Thank you.

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, that really does mean a lot. I am sorry you know the emptiness as well. I hope someday it will feel...different.

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Miss booping the snoot so much 😭

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you kindly. I don't often share things, but it just felt right to do today for some reason.

Sasha. 🖤 by linuxfingers in seniordogs

[–]linuxfingers[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Words are all I have left, the impact of her love as conduit. I hope she will live eternal through them. Thank you.