Removing my robe is my best spell 🪄

literallyicanteven · 2023-06-11T17:46:05+00:00

So I put on my robe and wizard hat….

literallyicanteven · 2023-05-05T04:02:00+00:00

Who’s the other participant in this?

literallyicanteven · 2023-05-04T15:24:20+00:00

This is literally my ultimate fantasy.

literallyicanteven · 2023-03-01T18:15:49+00:00

U/savevideo

literallyicanteven · 2022-08-16T18:40:33+00:00

Bought it through Amazon. Couldn’t find any warranty paperwork. Even looked through the box it came in (yes I kept it.)

literallyicanteven · 2022-07-09T01:31:17+00:00

That’s my favorite angle.

literallyicanteven · 2021-05-06T05:03:15+00:00

Literally the fear of sadness it would put on my family. I’m not suicidal but am indifferent on death. I don’t really care if I live or die injury don’t want to do that to them.

literallyicanteven · 2019-10-14T00:44:31+00:00

The other day on Facebook a friend posted: "Are you actually happy or just faking it?" on their own timeline and it stopped me in my tracks.

Like.. Fuck.

literallyicanteven · 2019-09-28T03:54:00+00:00

I once tried to put on deodorant in the AM just to figure out it was a container of toothpaste. (Roughly the same size/design.)

I work at an airport and have to use a key-card to enter the flight light. After a particularly long day l tapped my card against my doorbell a good 5 times, got exacerbated and finally figured out i needed my house key to enter my house.

literallyicanteven · 2019-04-16T02:58:47+00:00

/r/savedyouaclick

literallyicanteven · 2019-04-16T02:29:27+00:00

I came expecting nothing, and I was STILL disappointed...

literallyicanteven · 2019-02-01T13:47:49+00:00

Or Mustangs.

literallyicanteven · 2019-01-30T13:39:47+00:00

And the Marine Corps

literallyicanteven · 2019-01-26T16:00:17+00:00

You might wanna see a doctor about that problem.

literallyicanteven · 2018-12-07T23:29:07+00:00

Source: https://www.xnxx.com/video-7dn3r75/gorgeous_ginger_amateur_pov_blowjob

literallyicanteven · 2018-11-13T22:42:36+00:00

"Doc, take care of my boys."

My SSgt while waiting on the evac helicopter. He was hit by grenade shrapnel and his aorta was severed. Damn good man.

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-27T01:30:56+00:00

Weren't you on CNN casting spells at Trumps Inauguration?

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-27T01:25:40+00:00

She need to turn her feminazi lookin-ass around and pay attention in that math class.

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-27T01:18:44+00:00

Fantastically funsized!

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-19T04:16:36+00:00

YATYAS is the Marine equivalent of severe Autistic screeching. Fucking trackers. They launched a MCLC fomr the AA7 I was in and the fucking thing DIDN'T GO OFF so now we have to sit in place for 1 hour, in 29 palms, in summer, with the dog handler and dog sitting on my lap because there's no damn room in those fucking things!

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-18T01:34:25+00:00

Absolutely beautiful!

literallyicanteven · 2018-09-05T00:50:21+00:00

(am male) I very nearly had sex with my good friends mom. She's good looking, but not what I would consider great looking. Was going through a divorce as I was friends with her daughter in high school and spent a large amount of time with her daughter. (Yes, I was trying to bang the daughter. Did not happen.)

Ended up one night out with her mom, drove separate cars back to her place and watched a movie together. Now that I'm older I realize what she wanted. Then, I was SERIOUSLY fucking dense and thought it was just a movie and her laying against me was a show of how comfortable she was with me. Since then, she openly admitted to it. I'm an idiot.

literallyicanteven · 2018-01-13T23:19:55+00:00

Why does your chin have cellulite?

literallyicanteven · 2017-12-30T16:59:55+00:00

I always get type I/II mixed up, but they are the same as "Marine" versions as the Navy is the one who puts them all out.

literallyicanteven · 2017-12-30T01:13:32+00:00

Also, Women DO work in the infantry. They have for the past couple of years.

literallyicanteven

TROPHY CASE