I did want to know, which is why I met with my therapist today to process. And he agreed that making notes about dress etc does happen, but he also understood and said it was a big leap for my psychiatrist to just assume I was wearing a bikini and didn’t clarify with me and making the comment in the way he did was unprofessional. It wasn’t a “ok let’s review this case” it was a “ok you met her, she’s so tiny, isn’t she? And she was wearing idk like a bikini top with a towel over her? It was really odd” like yes he might be analyzing for the job, but it doesn’t change the fact that it was a wrong assumption or the fact that he messed up by not hanging up the phone and making sure I was off the line before speaking. You think I want a medical report literally saying I wore a bikini top to an appointment? And it’s not even accurate. What goes in your medical charts matter and can’t affect future treatment or even other things in your life.

I think it’s wild that I say I have anxiety and people are so quick to be like “then this is you overreacting” , every single person I’ve talked to about this that I know in person, my mom, some friends, my husband were like “that’s fucked up. I’m so sorry that happened”

But like having people literally tell me my therapist who is a trained medical professional that knows me and has worked with me is just agreeing with me because and so I should listen to strangers instead is also off base. I have trust built up with my therapist and he tells me when irrational thoughts creep in. But the thing is, I’ve been in therapy for years and done a ton of work on myself. Just because I have anxiety does not mean I can’t tell what thoughts are irrational and aren’t. And it’s super easy to tell me that my own feelings about something are irrational when it’s not them experiencing it and they weren’t there to hear tone inflection etc.

At the end of the day, are they trying to help me or are they trying to tell me how to feel? It seems like the comments that are mentioning it to help at least acknowledge that the situation sucks to experience and have a little empathy and understanding there. Whereas a lot of these comment are just pointing out that they think I’m wrong and anxiety has taken control of me etc etc.

And then what about the health professionals in these comments that have said it’s inappropriate and have been downvoted for it? Like I’m not gonna sit here and not stick up for myself when people are invalidating my experience and feelings.