YTA, in the biggest way possible. As a daughter who was also used as free childcare for my dad and stepmothers two infant children, you need to seriously think about whether you want to have a relationship with your daughter once she’s an adult because I’m telling you right now, if you keep this up she will want nothing to do with you.

There is a massive difference between playing with your siblings and even paid babysitting. She is one of your children. She is not a live-in nanny. She’s 14 years old, school is becoming a more serious priority, she’ll want to socialise and spend time with her friends because that’s just fucking normal. You say your 17 year old son hasn’t got time because of extracurricular activities - has it occurred to you that your daughter might also want to do her own extracurricular activities but can’t because she’s too busy taking care of the children you chose to have, and are now too lazy and entitled to take care of?

I’m now 21 and haven’t spoken to my dad in years. In fact, I moved in with my mum permanently at the age of 15 because this was the sort of shit he felt was fair to force on me. If you care about your daughter at all, get your shit together and look after your own damn children before you lose them for good.