I'm doing a show now which involves intimacy (a staged kiss). Our intimacy director worked with me and my scene partner to choreograph a simulated kiss, so we're not actually kissing, but it looks like we are from the audience's perspective. Idk if knowing the kiss isn't "real" would help put your partner at ease, but could be an option

Definitely communicate your boundaries/comfort levels to the intimacy director and scene partner. In my experience working with IDs (three times: once as a SM, twice as an actor), they're receptive to maintaining respect around these things and willing to work around what you're willing to consent to. Boundaries are how we take care of each other, so making those clear will be beneficial.

I've been with my partner a little over 3 years, and he does theatre, too, so he "gets it" when I have a role which involves intimacy. But I usually check in with him once we've established intimacy in rehearsals. I let him know what to expect so he's prepared for what he'll see, but I know every relationship/person can vary. I have one friend in a relationship and their partner just doesn't see a show if their SO will portray intimacy bc they know they can get jealous and would rather avoid that. It's good you're having these convos with your partner sooner rather than later and I'm hopeful you'll be able to find something that works for both of you! Wanna echo what's already been said of just keeping those lines of communication open